impotence

I am sorry to hear about your impotence. Specially since I had my surgery only 5 months ago. I am 58 and was told by my surgeon that if I wasn't having any erectile problems before surgery I shouldn't have any problems after. I haven't had any erections yet and am also starting to be very pessimistic about ever having another natural erection. I have the same emotional struggle, in that I feel I should be thankful that I am cancer free so far. My wife says not to worry, we will adjust to the new artificial erections. I am truely thankful and fortunate to have her, but the depression over the loss of our love life, as I had become accustomed to after 35 years, continues to grow. I have been seeing a therapist but he's not much help. I had no luck with the pills and the vacuum pump is also unsatisfactory. I am now starting to try the caverject. It was painful the first time but I'm going to continue with it. I am sure that my reply is not giving you the kind of information you were expecting or needing. This is a truely a mean disease and as many others have previously stated, none of the treatment options are "user friendly". I just wanted to write and let you know that you are not alone. There are too many of us out here trying to deal with this problem. There are several web sites like this one where we can share our experiences and vent our feelings. I might suggest that you continue to communicate openly with your wife and with us. It helps! Good luck and God Bless!!

Hi Billy D,
I'm 52 and I had my RP 03/17/04. I have had some movement but nothing to bragg about. I inject myself for ED. I also take Red Gin Seng exstract and I have notice some frimness. It's only been 5 months and I have noticed some improvement considering they could only save 50% of my nerves. Check it out on line and don't give in. I would give it 2 or more years before I had something done. (Korean Red Gin Seng Exstract) It's expensive about $150 for a 320g bottle. I take a gram per day. They recommend 3 grams per day. Your young, so your odds of success are better than mine.

I am truly grateful to be alive. I had PC at 38 and I'm now 40 and cancer free. Still working at my sex life, please be patient, it's too early at 5 months or even a year to expect to get it back. I always try to remember, it took 38 years to get the way it was-45 minutes for the Doctor to change it all-and it ain't going to heal overnight. Currently use Cialis. But have recently had sex without using anything. It's not anything to write home about, but it's a start.

MK1965 said:

ED after prostatectomy

Grinder,

Here are people who suffer badly after RP, bad cases of unrecoverable erectile dysfunction even for very young guys.

See for your self and then judge all of us who were expected and told by our docs of not having any reasons not to have good recovery of erectile function and we are at terrible loss.

I am reading this forum from backside and found so many who did not regain erectile function.

I would certainly trade my loss of sexual function after RP for one that would develop years later down the road after RT.

i, dry probably, would not miss sex at age 65 as much as I am missing it now at 53 and being almost 17 months post RP with zero results and no sign of life in my penis. Should I mention that my erect penis is 1 inch of shaft and penis head (glans)?

Whole this ordeal tota derailed my relationship with my wife. She is post menopausal now and distanced herself from my problem. She pushed me to have surgery and now, we are in two different worlds, nothing to bind us together.

i will bring to life other old treads just to proof that RP makes thou and thousands of guys loose their QoL.

MK

Mission

MK1965 -- "a man on a mission."  We've all gotta have some purpose in life.

Again, variables

Pasting this from discussion about penile shortening...

"MK... you think your issue is with RP... no, your issue is the same issue we all have... who do you trust to give you all the variables to make the right decision for YOUR case. Your crusade should not be against Davinci surgery, your crusade should be against urologists that do not give the patient enough information to make the decision for his quality of life post-op. In my case, I was lucky because my GP was a accomodating with my reticence when I felt i was being hustled."

 You and H&O continue to ignore pertinent variables that must be assessed prior to RP, and that is the responsibility of your urologist. 

Will someone come to this thread that RP would be in their best interest, but will shy away because your urologist failed to inform you of the side effects that would directly affect your case?

Do you really want to be responsible for someone who shies away from RP and may even risk their life with prostate cancer just because of your experience?

In my situation, i am fearful that i might have seen posts like yours and H&O's and  changed my mind avout RP... if i had it would have been the  BIGGEST mistake of my life! 

Do you really want that responsibility? 

I keep telling you guys about my neighbor... you keep ignoring it. What  would he have given to have an RP before his PC got out of control? I could go to his grave and ask him, but he wont be able to answer. PC is the silent killer. He didnt know he had it because he was a "what do I need a doctor for" kind of guy. He was one reason i got the RP. He warned all family and friends before he passed... it was not a pleasant way to go either. 

Since no one else has the guts to say it, i will, because i could care less if anyone thinks i am a "hero".

If you are considering radical prostatectomy, and your penis is shorter than 3" , opt for open surgery instead, because robotic RP can't lower the bladder when reattaching the urethra.

That is  the entire issue here. And every urologist should be informing patients of that VARIABLE.

hopeful and optimistic said:

" You and H&O continue to

" You and H&O continue to ignore pertinent variables that must be assessed prior to RP, and that is the responsibility of your urologist"

Not ignored, did lots of research about surgery and the major side effects, so no way will I have, or recommend this barberic treatment.

Grinder, how many posts are you going to make to respond to this? I think that your average is three or tour.......

1:1

I have not bothered to do an exact count, but Grinder is pretty much matching you 1:1, H & O.

max

Never going to see the light

Hi All,

MK & H&O are never going to say anything good about the surgery option for Pca.  First of all H&O has never had surgery, kinda like taking car advice from a person who has never worked on a car.  You can read books but you get good experience from working underneath the hood. MK has had a bad experience from surgery but like you said Grinder there are variables that can make your surgery go bad or go good.  MK & H&O you really need to watch what you are posting because people come to this board for honest experiences, and H&O you have none as it relates to surgery.  MK we all feel sorry for you and your bad outcome but there are several people here who have had acceptable/ good outcomes.  Not fair to bias people against ANY treatment option, again I say ANY treament option.  H&O said "so no way will I have, or recommend this barberic treatment."  Surgery is a a valid treatment option and is getting better with the advances made in medicine.  H&O you really need to re-think your thoughts for someone who has never had surgery, saying surgery is barberic does not bode well for your credability on this subject. Surgery is never a barbaric treament option but possibly not the right selection for certain cases of Pca.  Any don't say you and the pro surgery guys are all alike & will always support surgery.  I think most of us including me support free choice based on facts and actual experiences not someone's opinion from which they have no experience(that discounts MK, he lived it and he should tell his surgery outcome.)

Dave 3+4

Dear FAN CLUB members

Dear Max, Grinder, DAve and Rob,

After reading stories from, and speaking with many men who have had significant side effects that may continue through out life from surgery,  I am an advocate for other treatment options that are available.  Many who are  eligible for Active Surveillance, simply monitoring, as I am doing, instead  elect to have intervention of surgery or radiation, with immediate consequences and   potential long term life changing side effects. Studies have shown that there are similar cure rates betweeen radiation and surgery; however radiation generally has less side effects.

Some of the members of my fan club are examples of men who have had bad outcomes, but still persist in avocating  the procedure, and also  who instead of simply monitoring the disease of which they were eligible,  elected to cut it out with potential side effects. Frankly I cannot understand the logic of men seeking and advocating a procedure where great side effects commonally happen. 

 

 

Individual choice

Hi All,

Unless you are up in years I don't see how AS can put off the inevitable decision of surgery or radiation somewhere down the road.  AS will give you time to spend on selecting the best form of future treatment.  Yes if your cancer is small and non agressive maybe, just maybe you can beat it by waiting it out.  But for some of us with 4 and above ratings AS is not an option unless you want to fold up your table and go home. Both Surgery and the various forms of Radiation ALL HAVE SIDE EFFECTS.  If people on this form have not had any side effects from surgery or radiation I wish they would speak up, I doubt there are few.   It's a choice that most 4+ Pca patients will have to make at one time and we need to share our experiences with them, not condem certain treatments base on our own personal bias.  There is no magic wand to waive that will take away our cancer. Everyone is free to choose but they must understand the consequences with that choice.  There are no Mulligan's once you choose your treament, so study the side effects carefully.

Dave 3+4

Glad I took a gander today....

Just had my 6 month PSA tested a couple weeks ago, still <.04, undetectable.   Yep, six months after my successful Robotic Surgery.    Seems like a lifetime ago since diagnosis, but really only nine months.   Time is an intesting dynamic.   So much to learn for all just beginning to visit these forums.  I started reading foums after diagnosis and decided on surgery relatively early on.  I problably should have research radiation more than I did.  I would recommend all to do so who are new to this.    I was diagnosed with a G4+3.  

My urologist, and subsequent surgeons, all discussed radiation a bit, and the surgery itself, the process and potentail side effects.   No one held anything back, but I also got the best information when I asked better questions.   That's where these fourms help, you learn and can ask your providers better questions.   They all gave me good information, but they also are optimistic about what they do.   For those new to this, you as a patient owe it to yourself to dig in deeper for better clarified information.   

I'll admit, once I scheduled my surgery, I was worried about long term ED and urinary issues.   Who wouldn't after reading stories online.    But I believe people who have no long term issues don't really stay on forums for the long term.   I myself have started to stay away, as I want to put this whole cnacer thing behind me.   But, at six months it still stays with you.   So coming back to these forums still helps.

My point.   (Sorry it took me so long to get to it)   I have never had any leakage since my surgery and catheter removal.   Not once.  I sleep through the night without getting up to pee, just like prior to surgery.   I had two erections with a catheter in.   I started Sildeafil 7 days after surgery, cathetre in for 14 days.   I have had pretty good erections for the last 6 months.   I'm not 100% yet, but good enough for a good time.    I think Toby Keith sang it best "I ain't as good as I once was, but I'm as good once as I ever was".   I fully expect to be much better in a year, I'm shooting for 100%.  And why not.

Was I lucky?    Sure.  Did I get to a really good surgeon?   Yes, I sure think that was part of it.  And I found him by asking questions.   I was also healthy going in, and younger, 56.    Trifecta!!    I have others ask me for my opinion, I always give it.   It's always the same, Check all your options and pick the best one for you, and most importatnly trust your gut.   Oh, and no guarantees for anything, short term or long term.

I don't look at my treatment as barbaric at all.   I look at those six scars every morning in the mirror.  Along with my three appendectomy scars, I look like a bad-**** who survived one heck of a knife fight.   Some Halloween I'm going to fit that into a costume idea.  I feel very fortunate that I had robotic surgery when I did.   One last opinion, and it is only my opinion, I never think of anything will be worse in 5, 10 or 20 years than it is today because of treatment choice.    That was my one recurring concern last summer when researching my options when thinking of radiation for the long term.