30 yr old husband dx'd stage iv

My husband was diagnosed January 04 with stage IV cancer. It all started with three months of constant back pain. We saw a family doctor, an orthopedic, went through physical therapy and saw 2 seperate er doctors. The first time in the er twice and the doctor told him he was young and healthy and to basically get over it, back injury's take months to heal. Even though he had already lost 40lbs. Three weeks later we returned to the er and we refused to leave till the figured out what was wrong. They did their job. He had a Pet scan done, xrays, and many labs. The Pet scan revealed there was soft tissue around the esophagus and they said maybe ulcers. He was admitted and before the GI doctors scoped him, one doctor made the comment there is no way he has cancer. When they found out there were malignant cells we never saw that doc again.

My husband's weight a year ago was 180 and now its 125. They first suspected that it was in the lymph nodes and the lungs. We received a second opinion and they said the same thing he's uneligable for surgery. He has had 6 rounds of chemo and is on a trial drug and now they are saying there never was any cancer in his lung, it's probably old scarring. Due to the lymph node involvement it's still satge iv and maybe that's why I am confused. I feel that they should be more aggresive. He has always been very healthy, never smoked. The doctors are saying quality of life but on a thirty year old with a 3 year old and 11 month old baby, I think it should survival. I feel surgery should be an option since it's only involvement is in his lymph nodes.

I have been on many websites and message boards. Heck, I know the cancer down to the cellular level. This is the first time I have talked openly about this. It's still very shocking. When I read the profile of adenocarcinoma of the esophagus it makes me so mad that my husband does not fit the description at all. The doctors call it unfortunate, I call it unfair!