Waiting, worried & confused

Etta
Etta Member Posts: 5
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
My mom was diagnosed with breast cancer 2 weeks ago & it's taking so long for the results, but tuesday she was told it is an agressive cancer and it is all in her lymph nodes her 1 doctor told her she will have to start kemo then have surgery then end with radiation, but my question is is there any one out there that can help shed some light on this. Does she have a chance are there any surviors out there that can give me help so I can help her? I know I babbled but Im so afraid & confused I only want to help her Thank you

Comments

  • bettygee
    bettygee Member Posts: 40
    #2
    Dear Etta: First I want to extend my deepest sympathy for your mothers illness. Please don't give up hope, I had a vert aggressive cancer in my right breast and lymph node involvment in 1999. I had mastectomy followed by chemo and radiation. I remained very well until January this year when I had a recurrence in a lymph node. I am awaiting results of tests and decisions on treatment. You will be a great help and support to your mother as my daughter was to me. Sometimes all you can do is pray and hold her hand through the bad times, but believe me that is a big help! And remember when the really rough treatments have ended, she can have years to enjoy her family and be a mom to you. All the best to you both, I will pray and have positive thoughts for you. Betty
  • Etta
    Etta Member Posts: 5
    #3
    bettygee said:

    Dear Etta: First I want to extend my deepest sympathy for your mothers illness. Please don't give up hope, I had a vert aggressive cancer in my right breast and lymph node involvment in 1999. I had mastectomy followed by chemo and radiation. I remained very well until January this year when I had a recurrence in a lymph node. I am awaiting results of tests and decisions on treatment. You will be a great help and support to your mother as my daughter was to me. Sometimes all you can do is pray and hold her hand through the bad times, but believe me that is a big help! And remember when the really rough treatments have ended, she can have years to enjoy her family and be a mom to you. All the best to you both, I will pray and have positive thoughts for you. Betty

    Thanks Betty. I have been strong for her but Im so worried because she hasn't been told exactly how bad it is or how long her treatments will be or anyother meds she might have to take. Im sorry you have to be going through this and my prayers are with you also & wish you the best. Can you give me any questions I could ask her Oncolg. on Monday things that could help myself and her understand what is happening? Thank you
  • epgnyc
    epgnyc Member Posts: 137
    #4
    Hi, Etta. I'm very sorry to hear of your mom's diagnosis. While it's not a diagnosis anyone wants to hear, your mom is lucky to have such a loving daughter to support her through it. First let me say, there is ALWAYS a chance. There are people on this site living for many, many years with advanced breast cancer, so don't give up hope. As to your request for some questions to ask the doctors, that's a very good place to start. Right on this website you'll find a list of questions specifically relating to breast cancer. Go to the home page and you'll see "Choose a Cancer Topic". Just fill in "breast cancer" and it will take you to that section. On the left-hand side of the page you'll see "Treatment Options" - click on that. Then on the right-hand side of that page you'll see "Questions to Ask". Hope this helps. Hang in there...things will get better. You and your mother are still at the point where everything is at its most frightening and confusing. Good luck.
  • 1Supermom
    1Supermom Member Posts: 12
    #5
    Hi Etta,
    I'm so sorry to hear your mom's news. I'm VERY new at this, having just had my surgery in February, but I've learned a few things:
    1. If you even think you have a question for the doctor, ask it.
    2. Have the doc give you a copy of the pathology report. There are all sorts of details in there that you can use to research stuff for yourself and help you understand the type of cancer your mom has and the treatment regimens and prognoses you can expect.
    3. Visit the cancer center in the hospital that's treating your mom. They have ALL SORTS of resources available to you and the social workers at the hospital ARE GREAT AND VERY HELPFUL. Also, get a copy of the breast cancer booklet that your mom should have received. I don't have it with me now and I don't remember the exact name of mine. I'll check when I get home and get back with you.
    4. Every knee, every name, even cancer must bow to the name of Jesus. If you're a Christian, curse the cancer in Jesus' name and command it to die. Just ask the Lord to show you the way.
  • Ronee33
    Ronee33 Member Posts: 25
    #6
    I was diagnosed in August 2003 with agressive cancer, also with lymph node involvement. I had two lumpectomies, followed by 8 doses of chemo, followed by a bilateral mastectomy 3 weeks ago. I just got my pathology report back - they see no evidence of cancer in my body. That's the hope your mother has. Breast cancer does not kill women like it used to. There is much hope.
    I wouldn't wish chemo on my worst enemy. It can be that bad. But with a supportive cast - family and friends - she should be able to come through this stronger on the other end. I know I am!
  • 1Supermom
    1Supermom Member Posts: 12
    #7
    Etta,
    The booklet I mentioned is put out by the American Cancer Society and the National Comprehensive Cancer Network. I was given a copy by both my surgeon and also by my oncologist. It's simply titled, "Breast Cancer, Treatment Guidelines for Patients." If your doctors don't have a copy (but I'm sure they do), you can get one through either of the above organizations. You already know the ACS's website, but their phone is 1-800-ACS-2345 and info for the NCCN is www.nccn.org and 1-800-909-NCCN. The booklet isn't comprehensive, but it gives you a solid overview and is a great place to start. And it will help you decipher all the details on the pathology report so you'll get a good idea of what you and your mom are dealing with. I hope that helps. Good luck to you and godspeed.
  • lynne40
    lynne40 Member Posts: 87
    #8
    Hi Etta, Sorry about your Mom's diagnosis but you will find that there are alot of women living on these boards full lives with much hope. Take comfort. Ask questions. The more informed you are the better you will feel about treatment. I took a typed list with me and the docs were great about answering every question. It also helps to have another adult with your Mom at each appointment. Then you can compare notes and discuss what was said so your answers are clear. I did dose dense A/C and was Ok most of the time but the last 2 treatments had a cumulative affect. I also had neulasta shots which made me ache but I wasn't sick even once even though my husband and daughter were. Tell your Mom we are all praying for her and you can come here anytime for help and support and prayers! Hugs,
    Lynne
  • LKBrokaw
    LKBrokaw Member Posts: 5
    #9
    Etta,
    2 1/2 years ago I was diagnosed with a very aggressive breast cancer.(my mammogram 5 months earlier had been clear) I had a lumpectomy and node removal, 13 of 20 were positive. Plus mine was not estrogen related. Very scary stuff. My oncologist put me on an aggressive treatment. 4 cycles AC, then 4 cycles Taxol followed by 7 weeks of radiation. I have had only clear test results in the 2 years following the end of treatment. I know you're worried for your mother was my kids were for me, but you can support her by urging her to be strong and positive in her attitude during treatment. Humor helps,too. If she has a good support system of family and friends, she's well on her way to a cure!

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