Vulvar cancer/repeat/depression

cbryson · February 2004

I am a first time user of ANY chat room; I've always been kind of scared of them. But I've reached a point where I am so depressed, and on anti-depressants, and I need people who have had cancer like me to talk to. In 1995, I was diagnosed with a skin cancer on my left vulvar area. It was a Stage III skin cancer, malignant, and so I was shipped off to Barnes-Jewish in St Louis and underwent a radiacal vulvectomy : removal of the entire labia and lymph nodes on the left side. At that time, all doctors were confident the entire cancer was removed, so I didn't have to have any follow-up radiation/chemo. Two years ago, the cancer re-appeared in a lower area on the same side. This time, my cancer doctor said five weeks chemo/radiation and then surgery to remove the affected area - and since it was so close to my anus, a possible colostemy. I was so sick during all this treatment, but I felt guilty complaining, because at the same time, a friend from work was undergoing six months of the same for ovarian cancer. I tried to be "good" - keep up a good face, etc. The radiation/chemo worked, and the surgery went okay, and no colostemy. However, since this second occurance, I have had nothing but trouble in the vulvar area: infections, itching, a D&C to remove polyps, lots of pain, several biopies when they thought they spotted a bad area. The diagnosis is that since it's such a thin-skinned area, there is not much that can be done for the destroyed tissues, except use topical creams, etc. In the middle of all this, I have started menopause, AND been diagnosed with both high blood pressure, and hypothyroidism (which made me gain a ton, makes me tired, and edgy - and we are still working out medication dosages to correct). Now, my pap smear has come out abnormal, and they want to do another biopsy only we can't because I'm currently suffering ANOTHER infection (strep) on the cancer side, and a yeast infection (caused by the penicillan) on the right. I just want to give it all up, people! I'm so tired of this whole thing. I'm also scared every time something new comes up that the cancer has returned. I am a normally cheerful, outgoing person, but lately I just want to keep away from people and hide at home. I'm tired of explaining all my illnesses to work bosses, and I think that people think I'm a hypochondriac and I feel bad whining when I haven't had it half as bad as say, someone who's had a mastectomy. Sorry this is so long, but it's my first message, and I sorta wanted to pour my heart out. Anyone who wants to correspond with me, please do. I just need a sympathetic shoulder to cry on at the moment, and I'll gladly return the favor when I am feeling better. Thanks for "listening." Cathy

epgnyc · February 2004

Hi, Cathy. I myself am a breast cancer survivor and am usually on the breast cancer part of this discussion board. But I have a friend who was diagnosed last July with vulvar cancer and so I was looking to see if anyone had anything helpful to say about her cancer - when I cam across your posting. I feel so badly for you. You've certainly had a really difficult time of it and I can't say I blame you for feeling down. We all get that way sometimes when fighting cancer. It all just builds up....the treatments, the surgeries, the feeling sick all the time, the fears, the worries, the wondering when it will end and we can get back to a somewhat normal life. You've just hit one of those tough spots and are feeling discouraged. You're entitled. I for one am amazed at the strength you've shown in fighting your cancer - you've been through a lot and have coped with it all. Just take a deep breath and try to be kind to yourself. Surround yourself with friends and supportive family members during the difficult patch. I'm saying some prayers for you. Hang in there - you're great!
Ellen

cbryson · February 2004

epgnyc said:
Hi, Cathy. I myself am a breast cancer survivor and am usually on the breast cancer part of this discussion board. But I have a friend who was diagnosed last July with vulvar cancer and so I was looking to see if anyone had anything helpful to say about her cancer - when I cam across your posting. I feel so badly for you. You've certainly had a really difficult time of it and I can't say I blame you for feeling down. We all get that way sometimes when fighting cancer. It all just builds up....the treatments, the surgeries, the feeling sick all the time, the fears, the worries, the wondering when it will end and we can get back to a somewhat normal life. You've just hit one of those tough spots and are feeling discouraged. You're entitled. I for one am amazed at the strength you've shown in fighting your cancer - you've been through a lot and have coped with it all. Just take a deep breath and try to be kind to yourself. Surround yourself with friends and supportive family members during the difficult patch. I'm saying some prayers for you. Hang in there - you're great!
Ellen

Ellen, Thank you for the encouraging words. I do have good friends, and they are a comfort to me, but sometimes I feel like I'm bothering people when I talk all the time about all the stuff going on. Have you ever felt that way? I go for another(!) biopsy March 25th and hopefully that will be negative and put everything right for awhile. Your prayers are much appreciated and I will reciprocate for both your friend (let me know how things go for her) and for you. Again, thanks for the comforting words: I will take a deep breath, and let myself relax until the biopsy, and go from there. Talk to you later, maybe?

Cathy

dcarl · March 2004

Hi Cathy - I know exactly what you're going through, I had basically the same operations (radical vulvectomy and lymph nodes) except on my right side. It is so hard to explain to people since it's such an embarrassing situation. I find it especially difficult talking to men who ask about it. A lot of women don't really understand vulvar cancer either. Sounds like you were lucky to avoid the colostomy. I was really afraid mine would head in that direction, luckily it is moving in the other direction. I say luckily considering the alternative. I have yet to go a year without a procedure. I was diagnosed 3 years ago. April will be a year and my 3 month check up is in May. I know how you are feeling with the depression and all. I too am taking antidepressants but it began long before the cancer. I know I'm very lucky and I go on the chat room here sometimes and listen to what other people say. I can't believe some of the cancers they are talking about. Brain cancer, lung cancer breast cancer. They are very uplifting if you want to try out the chat room. Takes a while to jump into conversation but helpful non the less. I keep looking at myself compared to terminally ill patients and people in countries that have no health care at all. I know it sounds a little commercial but it keeps me going. I'd like to keep in touch with you and hope you'll respond to this message. I hope we can continue to support each other and get through this better people.

Diane

cbryson · March 2004

dcarl said:
Hi Cathy - I know exactly what you're going through, I had basically the same operations (radical vulvectomy and lymph nodes) except on my right side. It is so hard to explain to people since it's such an embarrassing situation. I find it especially difficult talking to men who ask about it. A lot of women don't really understand vulvar cancer either. Sounds like you were lucky to avoid the colostomy. I was really afraid mine would head in that direction, luckily it is moving in the other direction. I say luckily considering the alternative. I have yet to go a year without a procedure. I was diagnosed 3 years ago. April will be a year and my 3 month check up is in May. I know how you are feeling with the depression and all. I too am taking antidepressants but it began long before the cancer. I know I'm very lucky and I go on the chat room here sometimes and listen to what other people say. I can't believe some of the cancers they are talking about. Brain cancer, lung cancer breast cancer. They are very uplifting if you want to try out the chat room. Takes a while to jump into conversation but helpful non the less. I keep looking at myself compared to terminally ill patients and people in countries that have no health care at all. I know it sounds a little commercial but it keeps me going. I'd like to keep in touch with you and hope you'll respond to this message. I hope we can continue to support each other and get through this better people.

Diane

Hi, Diane. It does sound like we are going through much the same things now and I will be glad to keep in touch with you and have someone whose shoulder I can cry on (and you can cry on mine!). I agree with you about vulvar cancer being embarrassing to explain, but get this: I had skin cancer on the vulvar area, which is really kinda hard to explain, since this is not an area you flash around in the sun alot, and I had always assumed that's how you got skin cancer. When they first told me, I was shocked. It was such an unusual thing, even fof the doctors, that when I had my original operation back in 1995, they brought in interns to my hospital room and used me as a "lesson!" And then they kept saying, well, it is so unusual, and we got it all, it's like a one-time thing. Well, then, exactly five years later, it popped up again directly below the original site. My doctor was shocked. Needless to say I was not a happy camper. At the moment, I'm very very worried, not just because of the biopsy on the 25th, but because I have a very sore area on the scar tissue on my "good" side, and that immediately screams "cancer!" to me. I'm going to see my doctor next week for that. Ah well, sigh. How are you doing this week? Oh, and I agree, I sometimes feel really bad for feeling sorry for myself when people have gone through so much more than me, but then I feel like I've gone through a lot too, so I should be able to feel sorry for me every now and then. Does that sound nuts? Well, I hope to hear back from you.

Cathy

epgnyc · March 2004

cbryson said:
Ellen, Thank you for the encouraging words. I do have good friends, and they are a comfort to me, but sometimes I feel like I'm bothering people when I talk all the time about all the stuff going on. Have you ever felt that way? I go for another(!) biopsy March 25th and hopefully that will be negative and put everything right for awhile. Your prayers are much appreciated and I will reciprocate for both your friend (let me know how things go for her) and for you. Again, thanks for the comforting words: I will take a deep breath, and let myself relax until the biopsy, and go from there. Talk to you later, maybe?

Cathy

Hi, Cathy. I just wanted to say good luck with your biopsy on the 25th. I'm sending powerful good thoughts your way that it's negative and everything is clear. And I definitely did have times during my 10 months of treatment for breast cancer when I felt I shouldn't burden my friends and family any further....and believe me I have great friends and family. Sometimes it just needs to be someone who's going through it or has gone through the same thing that we need to talk to. So good luck. We're cheering for you.
Ellen

dcarl · March 2004

cbryson said:
Hi, Diane. It does sound like we are going through much the same things now and I will be glad to keep in touch with you and have someone whose shoulder I can cry on (and you can cry on mine!). I agree with you about vulvar cancer being embarrassing to explain, but get this: I had skin cancer on the vulvar area, which is really kinda hard to explain, since this is not an area you flash around in the sun alot, and I had always assumed that's how you got skin cancer. When they first told me, I was shocked. It was such an unusual thing, even fof the doctors, that when I had my original operation back in 1995, they brought in interns to my hospital room and used me as a "lesson!" And then they kept saying, well, it is so unusual, and we got it all, it's like a one-time thing. Well, then, exactly five years later, it popped up again directly below the original site. My doctor was shocked. Needless to say I was not a happy camper. At the moment, I'm very very worried, not just because of the biopsy on the 25th, but because I have a very sore area on the scar tissue on my "good" side, and that immediately screams "cancer!" to me. I'm going to see my doctor next week for that. Ah well, sigh. How are you doing this week? Oh, and I agree, I sometimes feel really bad for feeling sorry for myself when people have gone through so much more than me, but then I feel like I've gone through a lot too, so I should be able to feel sorry for me every now and then. Does that sound nuts? Well, I hope to hear back from you.

Cathy

Hi Cathy, I'm glad we could make a connection. I hate being in this alone. I met a woman in my area who had vulvar cancer too but we just didn't click. She was into all this weird self help stuff like the power of touch and aromatherapy. I don't know about anyone else but that kind of stuff didn't do it for me. Don't get me wrong she is a very nice person and I appreciate her kinship. I always thought this might be a skin cancer but it was never discussed as such by my gyn onc.I don't blame you for being freaked out by the class full of students. I always say no when they ask me if I can be a learning exhibit. Unless there is only one person, it's a little less uncomfortable. I hope your biopsy goes alright on the 25th. I just found out today that I have a tear in my medial miniscus in my right knee and I'll need surgery. They are doing orthoscopic(sp?) on the 25th also and I should be fine by Monday. I'll be thinking of you and your biopsy that is on the same day. I hope you're wrong about the hunch you have about it being a recurrance. You are right, we are suffering too and I guess feeling sorry for ourselves is as much deserved as necessary for our own well being. Just try not to keep it inside - I found it soothing to talk about it if not with friends and family, I like to find people on this site to connect with. People you encounter here tend to understand better. I'll always be here if you need to talk.
take care and good luck on the 25th.

Diane

cbryson · March 2004

dcarl said:
Hi Cathy, I'm glad we could make a connection. I hate being in this alone. I met a woman in my area who had vulvar cancer too but we just didn't click. She was into all this weird self help stuff like the power of touch and aromatherapy. I don't know about anyone else but that kind of stuff didn't do it for me. Don't get me wrong she is a very nice person and I appreciate her kinship. I always thought this might be a skin cancer but it was never discussed as such by my gyn onc.I don't blame you for being freaked out by the class full of students. I always say no when they ask me if I can be a learning exhibit. Unless there is only one person, it's a little less uncomfortable. I hope your biopsy goes alright on the 25th. I just found out today that I have a tear in my medial miniscus in my right knee and I'll need surgery. They are doing orthoscopic(sp?) on the 25th also and I should be fine by Monday. I'll be thinking of you and your biopsy that is on the same day. I hope you're wrong about the hunch you have about it being a recurrance. You are right, we are suffering too and I guess feeling sorry for ourselves is as much deserved as necessary for our own well being. Just try not to keep it inside - I found it soothing to talk about it if not with friends and family, I like to find people on this site to connect with. People you encounter here tend to understand better. I'll always be here if you need to talk.
take care and good luck on the 25th.

Diane

Hi, Diane. Well, there have been a couple of changes and a little bit of a scare the last week or so. If you read my last new message, I'd found a sore place that I was so afraid might be cancer on the scar tissue on my "good" side. So, we cancelled my 25th biopsy (again), which is a vaginal biopsy due to an abnormal pap, and my cancer guy did a biopsy of this sore spot. Had to wait a whole weekend to find out that it was good news and not a recurrance of the skin cancer. So, now the vaginal biopsy is back on but for April 1st. So, I'll be thinking of you on the 25th and wishing you good luck with your knee surgery, and you can think of me on, ironically, April Fool's Day, being poked once again by an unfriendly instrument. I'll take a valium beforehand, so maybe I'll be out of it enough not to "suffer" so much. I'm glad to have someone like you to "complain" to: you are right, I shouldn't keep this stuff inside, but I've gotten very sensitive about "bothering" people with my problems. Ah well. You take care, and let me know how things go.

twinsmamaw · March 2004

cbryson said:
Hi, Diane. Well, there have been a couple of changes and a little bit of a scare the last week or so. If you read my last new message, I'd found a sore place that I was so afraid might be cancer on the scar tissue on my "good" side. So, we cancelled my 25th biopsy (again), which is a vaginal biopsy due to an abnormal pap, and my cancer guy did a biopsy of this sore spot. Had to wait a whole weekend to find out that it was good news and not a recurrance of the skin cancer. So, now the vaginal biopsy is back on but for April 1st. So, I'll be thinking of you on the 25th and wishing you good luck with your knee surgery, and you can think of me on, ironically, April Fool's Day, being poked once again by an unfriendly instrument. I'll take a valium beforehand, so maybe I'll be out of it enough not to "suffer" so much. I'm glad to have someone like you to "complain" to: you are right, I shouldn't keep this stuff inside, but I've gotten very sensitive about "bothering" people with my problems. Ah well. You take care, and let me know how things go.

Hi Cathy,

I'm Kathy, I have lichen sclerosus, which my doctor says is a pre vulvular cancer. This is so hard. Also, my husband has non hodgkins lymphoma, he relapsed, and is getting chemo now, and will be getting a stem cell transplant in the near future. I just feel helpless about his situation and my situation too. I'm supposed to get my lichen sclerosus checked every three months, my biopsy was negative for cancer in December, but I'm due to go back in next week. I'm hoping for a good report, because both of us can't have cancer at the same time. I'm 50 years old, soon to be 51. The depression is about to get to me, everyone says you will find the strength somewhere, I'm looking. I'm praying for you. Kathy

cbryson · March 2004

twinsmamaw said:
Hi Cathy,

I'm Kathy, I have lichen sclerosus, which my doctor says is a pre vulvular cancer. This is so hard. Also, my husband has non hodgkins lymphoma, he relapsed, and is getting chemo now, and will be getting a stem cell transplant in the near future. I just feel helpless about his situation and my situation too. I'm supposed to get my lichen sclerosus checked every three months, my biopsy was negative for cancer in December, but I'm due to go back in next week. I'm hoping for a good report, because both of us can't have cancer at the same time. I'm 50 years old, soon to be 51. The depression is about to get to me, everyone says you will find the strength somewhere, I'm looking. I'm praying for you. Kathy

Kathy, I wish I could instantly make you feel better, but I can't. What I can do is tell you that my prayers are with you. I pray that your test comes out negative and that your husband will soon be back in remission. It is very depressing when all the problems pile on at once; I have felt that way more than once over the last 6 or 7 years. Eventually tho, things seem to come together, even when I get bad news. My friends are always there, and my family, and now nice people on this site. Please, please feel free to contact me here any time, especially if you just need an ear to bend. I'll be here. Let me know how your test went. I'll let you know about mine after April 1st. Keeping the faith, Cathy

dcarl · March 2004

cbryson said:
Hi, Diane. Well, there have been a couple of changes and a little bit of a scare the last week or so. If you read my last new message, I'd found a sore place that I was so afraid might be cancer on the scar tissue on my "good" side. So, we cancelled my 25th biopsy (again), which is a vaginal biopsy due to an abnormal pap, and my cancer guy did a biopsy of this sore spot. Had to wait a whole weekend to find out that it was good news and not a recurrance of the skin cancer. So, now the vaginal biopsy is back on but for April 1st. So, I'll be thinking of you on the 25th and wishing you good luck with your knee surgery, and you can think of me on, ironically, April Fool's Day, being poked once again by an unfriendly instrument. I'll take a valium beforehand, so maybe I'll be out of it enough not to "suffer" so much. I'm glad to have someone like you to "complain" to: you are right, I shouldn't keep this stuff inside, but I've gotten very sensitive about "bothering" people with my problems. Ah well. You take care, and let me know how things go.

Cathy, sorry I haven't been logged on for a while. I'm really happy to hear about the spot being clear of the "C"word. Don't you just hate waiting for the results? So much goes through your mind. I'll be hoping for the best on the 1st.I hope your doc uses some sort of numbing agent before he does the biopsy! Can't imagine it without. I've been very itchy on my "good" side (as we say). I sure hope it isn't the dysplasia coming back. Will find out in May for my regular check up. I sincerely hope you continue to "bother" me with your problems. I tend to find that I make a connection with someone here and it peters out, it seems you like to correspond so I'll be here whenever you need. I'd like to think I can count on you, too. No one can fully understand the anxiety and other emotions we are going through like we can so don't feel as if you're all alone. That goes for anyone else out there going through this. Please keep in contact. (I hope this doesn't sound desperate!) but I really enjoy getting things off my chest. Hope to write soon. I've got a busy few weeks ahead of me but I'll make every effort to log on. Talk to you soon> Diane : )

dcarl · March 2004

twinsmamaw said:
Hi Cathy,

I'm Kathy, I have lichen sclerosus, which my doctor says is a pre vulvular cancer. This is so hard. Also, my husband has non hodgkins lymphoma, he relapsed, and is getting chemo now, and will be getting a stem cell transplant in the near future. I just feel helpless about his situation and my situation too. I'm supposed to get my lichen sclerosus checked every three months, my biopsy was negative for cancer in December, but I'm due to go back in next week. I'm hoping for a good report, because both of us can't have cancer at the same time. I'm 50 years old, soon to be 51. The depression is about to get to me, everyone says you will find the strength somewhere, I'm looking. I'm praying for you. Kathy

Kathy, I have vulvar cancer and know exactly how you feel. I know you have a double blow with your husband and all, but I'll be available if you'd like to vent. You can't go through this all and keep it inside. I also think it's easier to vent to total strangers merely because they aren't going to judge you. That's why I like to use this web site. Have you tried the chat room? They sometimes go too fast for me to jump in but they are very supportive. Isn't it just wonderful we are able to use stem cell research? Just imagine if it is deemed illegal. What then? We need to make sure we vote wisely in the upcoming election to keep the research alive. (hope you don't think I'm campaigning !) But keep it in your mind. What is lichen sclerosus? I have an idea in my mind but am not exactly sure. I do hope you've talked to your doc about the depression. Don't feel upset if you're prescribed something. You may find it helpful. Keep us informed on your biopsy.Will have nothing but good thoughts for you. Diane : )

cbryson · March 2004

dcarl said:
Cathy, sorry I haven't been logged on for a while. I'm really happy to hear about the spot being clear of the "C"word. Don't you just hate waiting for the results? So much goes through your mind. I'll be hoping for the best on the 1st.I hope your doc uses some sort of numbing agent before he does the biopsy! Can't imagine it without. I've been very itchy on my "good" side (as we say). I sure hope it isn't the dysplasia coming back. Will find out in May for my regular check up. I sincerely hope you continue to "bother" me with your problems. I tend to find that I make a connection with someone here and it peters out, it seems you like to correspond so I'll be here whenever you need. I'd like to think I can count on you, too. No one can fully understand the anxiety and other emotions we are going through like we can so don't feel as if you're all alone. That goes for anyone else out there going through this. Please keep in contact. (I hope this doesn't sound desperate!) but I really enjoy getting things off my chest. Hope to write soon. I've got a busy few weeks ahead of me but I'll make every effort to log on. Talk to you soon> Diane : )

Diane, Good to hear from you. I guess you'll be going in for your knee surgery next week; good luck on that and let me know how it goes when you feel up to it. Even though I found out the spot wasn't skin cancer, I am still having just tons of trouble with itching (like you) and severe burning when I pee. Both my doctor and radiologist says that the radiation just basically burned all my delicate skin in the vagina area, and I'll probably have these kinds of problems forever. Have you been told this? They have tried every topical and antibiotic cream know to medical science, and now we are back to just plain old over the counter Neosporane. It helps a little, but I'm basically being reduced to sitz baths once a day now, and sometimes twice on weekends. The real problem is that anything touching the site, like underwear, just irritates the hell out of the area. I heal up quite a bit on weeknds because I don't wear underwear at home (now there's info you probably didn't need, huh? HA!)so the area gets "aired" out and I actually feel better by Mondays. But by end of week, it's all bad again. Sigh. I'm still scheduled for vaginal biopsy on April 1st, but I don't see how I'm going to stand it, even with the valium. I'll probably feel quite sorry for myself that day, and probably a couple of days afterward. Do you have problems like these or did you after chemo/radiation? Well, I've gone on enough for this time. Sure, I'd love to keep in touch with you; just like "talking", I can go on and on (let me know if you want shorter chats)and I need someone to "listen" to me, too, who can sympathize whole heartedly. You take care and good luck with your surgery. E-mail me anytime you need some comfort.

lilflutterb · March 2004

hi c, i was just told i have vilvar cancer on the left side to, i,m scared to death!! i just did my second treatment of radition and now have to do chemo as a preventive measure i ask alot of questions and surround myself with friends and family. don,t try to do this alone and don,t lock yourself away. it won,t help you at all!! you sound like a strong person and you will get thru all this!!remember be strong positive your already halfway there!!

dcarl · March 2004

cbryson said:
Diane, Good to hear from you. I guess you'll be going in for your knee surgery next week; good luck on that and let me know how it goes when you feel up to it. Even though I found out the spot wasn't skin cancer, I am still having just tons of trouble with itching (like you) and severe burning when I pee. Both my doctor and radiologist says that the radiation just basically burned all my delicate skin in the vagina area, and I'll probably have these kinds of problems forever. Have you been told this? They have tried every topical and antibiotic cream know to medical science, and now we are back to just plain old over the counter Neosporane. It helps a little, but I'm basically being reduced to sitz baths once a day now, and sometimes twice on weekends. The real problem is that anything touching the site, like underwear, just irritates the hell out of the area. I heal up quite a bit on weeknds because I don't wear underwear at home (now there's info you probably didn't need, huh? HA!)so the area gets "aired" out and I actually feel better by Mondays. But by end of week, it's all bad again. Sigh. I'm still scheduled for vaginal biopsy on April 1st, but I don't see how I'm going to stand it, even with the valium. I'll probably feel quite sorry for myself that day, and probably a couple of days afterward. Do you have problems like these or did you after chemo/radiation? Well, I've gone on enough for this time. Sure, I'd love to keep in touch with you; just like "talking", I can go on and on (let me know if you want shorter chats)and I need someone to "listen" to me, too, who can sympathize whole heartedly. You take care and good luck with your surgery. E-mail me anytime you need some comfort.

Hi Cathy, It's the night before my knee scope. The only thing I'm nervous about is the anesthesia. I sometimes get nauseaus....can't wait!

I think the best healing help is letting the area "air out". Seems to get rid of the moisture that makes it irritated.

No, I've never had radiation or chemo - knock on wood - so I can't relate to any of that stuff.

Hopefully you'll get some good meds for your biopsy! Maybe get you a bit loopy for a while! Alwaays good for a laugh. At least you forget your problems for a while. I can't imagine not having some sort of novacain or something to numb the area.

If you haven't already done so, check out "misae" s message board. She has quite a story we could all learn from. She could probably use some support too.

Well, gotta go and get ready for the big day. (surgery). Talk to you soon - Diane

cbryson · March 2004

lilflutterb said:
hi c, i was just told i have vilvar cancer on the left side to, i,m scared to death!! i just did my second treatment of radition and now have to do chemo as a preventive measure i ask alot of questions and surround myself with friends and family. don,t try to do this alone and don,t lock yourself away. it won,t help you at all!! you sound like a strong person and you will get thru all this!!remember be strong positive your already halfway there!!

L, thanks for your upbeat e-mail. I try to stay strong, but as the saying goes, sometimes all the days gang up on me at once. I'm having a bad week this week, and am worrying myself to death over the biopsy next week. Hoepfully, once is over, and I have a negative result, I'll be okay. Good luck with your treatments. I know how scarey it is; I still can't drive by the clinic without getting slightly ill. You will do well, I'm sure. If you do feel bad sometime, feel free to e-mail and cry on my shoulder. I usually check in twice a week. Cathy

dcarl · April 2004

cbryson said:
L, thanks for your upbeat e-mail. I try to stay strong, but as the saying goes, sometimes all the days gang up on me at once. I'm having a bad week this week, and am worrying myself to death over the biopsy next week. Hoepfully, once is over, and I have a negative result, I'll be okay. Good luck with your treatments. I know how scarey it is; I still can't drive by the clinic without getting slightly ill. You will do well, I'm sure. If you do feel bad sometime, feel free to e-mail and cry on my shoulder. I usually check in twice a week. Cathy

Hi Cathy,

Was thinking of you the other day. How did the biopsy go? Do hope you're feeling all right. Have you gotten any results yet? How about comments from the doctor? Did he/she notice anything specific? I know you were nervous about it and I hope it didn't hurt too much. Let me know what happens.
I had my knee surgery. I can't believe modern medicine! I went in there barely able to put weight on my knee and walked out a couple hours later with no pain at all! I still have to do a bit of physical therapy and keep ice on it but other than that I feel great! Glad it's over with. We have a trip to Hawaii planned for April 18th. At least I know I'll be able to walk. It's our 20th wedding anniversary. Can't believe it has been that long. Can't believe I'm old enough to have been married 20 years!! Time flies.
Be sure to talk to me as soon as you get your results. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you!

Diane

cbryson · April 2004

dcarl said:
Hi Cathy,

Was thinking of you the other day. How did the biopsy go? Do hope you're feeling all right. Have you gotten any results yet? How about comments from the doctor? Did he/she notice anything specific? I know you were nervous about it and I hope it didn't hurt too much. Let me know what happens.
I had my knee surgery. I can't believe modern medicine! I went in there barely able to put weight on my knee and walked out a couple hours later with no pain at all! I still have to do a bit of physical therapy and keep ice on it but other than that I feel great! Glad it's over with. We have a trip to Hawaii planned for April 18th. At least I know I'll be able to walk. It's our 20th wedding anniversary. Can't believe it has been that long. Can't believe I'm old enough to have been married 20 years!! Time flies.
Be sure to talk to me as soon as you get your results. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you!

Diane

Diane, How great that your knee surgery turned out so well. I'm so happy for you! Well I had my biopsy last Thursday and I'll tell you, now that I know how painful it is, I ain't never having it again! HA! It was okay at first as I was rather loopy from my Valium and 1/2 Anti-depressant, but once the "tester" (I still don't know what it was, just that it looks like a long skinny thermometer) hit the tip of my uterus, I had major cramping pain in both sides and just about flew off the table. The nurse was holding my hand the whole time. They made me lay there for about fifteen minutes after. I stayed home the rest of the day, and still wasn't feeling up to snuff Friday, so stayed home then, too. I'm feeling lots better today, tho I've started spotting a little. They said they'd call me Monday or Tuesday with results. As soon as I get them, I'll send you a quick e-mail, okay? You guys will love Hawaii. I went there in 1994 and had a grand time; it's lovely there, and if you get a chance, take some side tours. I went on a helicopter ride and got great pictures of a waterfall. Anyway, I'll e-mail you next week. Thanks for your concern. I'm glad you're there for me. Cathy

cbryson · April 2004

dcarl said:
Hi Cathy,

Was thinking of you the other day. How did the biopsy go? Do hope you're feeling all right. Have you gotten any results yet? How about comments from the doctor? Did he/she notice anything specific? I know you were nervous about it and I hope it didn't hurt too much. Let me know what happens.
I had my knee surgery. I can't believe modern medicine! I went in there barely able to put weight on my knee and walked out a couple hours later with no pain at all! I still have to do a bit of physical therapy and keep ice on it but other than that I feel great! Glad it's over with. We have a trip to Hawaii planned for April 18th. At least I know I'll be able to walk. It's our 20th wedding anniversary. Can't believe it has been that long. Can't believe I'm old enough to have been married 20 years!! Time flies.
Be sure to talk to me as soon as you get your results. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you!

Diane

Diane, a follow-up to previous message. Got the results back: NO CANCER! Yay! The doctor said even tho the pap smear had abnormal cells, the vaginal biopsy showed no abnormalities, and that's what they'll go by. So barring further incidents, I don't go back for another checkup until July. In case I don't hear from you again before you go, Happy Anniversary and have lots of fun in Hawaii. Stay well. Cathy

dcarl · April 2004

cbryson said:
Diane, a follow-up to previous message. Got the results back: NO CANCER! Yay! The doctor said even tho the pap smear had abnormal cells, the vaginal biopsy showed no abnormalities, and that's what they'll go by. So barring further incidents, I don't go back for another checkup until July. In case I don't hear from you again before you go, Happy Anniversary and have lots of fun in Hawaii. Stay well. Cathy

WHOOO HOOO!!!! I am SO glad to hear your results!! Don't you just feel so much better knowing you're ok?
I'm sorry I haven't been on for a while - got a lot on my mind with the trip and all!My girls are staying home alone - I'm just a nervous wreck! I'm sure they'll be fine..
I see my ddoc the first week of May. Hopefully will talk to you before then.

GREAT NEWS!!!
Take care - Diane

dcarl · May 2004

dcarl said:
WHOOO HOOO!!!! I am SO glad to hear your results!! Don't you just feel so much better knowing you're ok?
I'm sorry I haven't been on for a while - got a lot on my mind with the trip and all!My girls are staying home alone - I'm just a nervous wreck! I'm sure they'll be fine..
I see my ddoc the first week of May. Hopefully will talk to you before then.

GREAT NEWS!!!
Take care - Diane

Cathy -

What's been going on? I haven't been on in what seems like ages. Our trip was wonderful, am ready to go back depsite the 10 hour plane ride!!
I hope you are well. I read yor reply to the new message board. I think I'll write to Cathy also.
I see my onc on Tuesday (9th). Am a bit nervous. I've had a lot of itching and bleeding on the left side now. Hope it's not what I think it is. Will let you know.

Hope to hear from you soon.

Diane

Vulvar cancer/repeat/depression

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