Need hope or advice.

gkoziarski
gkoziarski Member Posts: 8
edited March 2014 in Colorectal Cancer #1
Hello All,

This is my first time on this site and may not type the correct terminology, so please bear with me. Last August my brother was diagnosed with colon cancer that spread to his brain. He went through a chemo\radiation regiment and had the tumor removed from his brain. He then went through more chemo than went through surgery to get a permanent colostomy bag two weeks ago. We just found out that the cancer cells are back in his brain and that he has to go through more chemo. After the surgery the doctor told me that he was a stage 4, but I do not exactly know what this means. I was in so much shock that I did not get to answer all the questions I wanted to ask. I am writting this message to anyone that could give me suggestions on what to ask, give me hope, or just to listen. I am not sure as to how I should feel. I know that I am quite scared, not sure if I am just in denial....I don't know. If anyone could just respond with any suggestions, or tell me what to expect, I would really appreciate it.
God Bless,
Genia

Comments

  • idbaker
    idbaker Member Posts: 5
    Dear Genia,
    First off let me say your brother and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. I would take a note book and write down any questions that might pop into your head. No question is a stupid question. We are all scared going through this. Just be there for your brother. He will need you.
    God Bless you,
    De
  • nanuk
    nanuk Member Posts: 1,358 Member
    Genia: A few references for support and information:
    RA Block Cancer Foundation-1800-433-0464
    Colon Cancer Alliance-1-877-422-2030
    Cancer Hope Network 1-877-467-3638
    National Cancer Institute (www.cancer.gov) 1800-422-6237
    These organizations (and others) can match you with patients of similar diagnosis, and/or provide
    other resources. Please stay on ths site as the folks here are extremely helpful and supportive. Bud
  • gkoziarski
    gkoziarski Member Posts: 8
    idbaker said:

    Dear Genia,
    First off let me say your brother and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. I would take a note book and write down any questions that might pop into your head. No question is a stupid question. We are all scared going through this. Just be there for your brother. He will need you.
    God Bless you,
    De

    De,

    Thank you for your thoughts and prayers. I never really knew how effective these sites could be. It really does help to read the postings.

    -gkoziarski
  • gkoziarski
    gkoziarski Member Posts: 8
    nanuk said:

    Genia: A few references for support and information:
    RA Block Cancer Foundation-1800-433-0464
    Colon Cancer Alliance-1-877-422-2030
    Cancer Hope Network 1-877-467-3638
    National Cancer Institute (www.cancer.gov) 1800-422-6237
    These organizations (and others) can match you with patients of similar diagnosis, and/or provide
    other resources. Please stay on ths site as the folks here are extremely helpful and supportive. Bud

    Nanuk/Bud,

    Thank you for the info. I will make some calls first thing tommorrow.

    Could you or anyone reading explain to me what the "Juicing and Smoothies" terminology on this site means?

    Thank you,
    gkoziarski
  • gkoziarski
    gkoziarski Member Posts: 8

    Nanuk/Bud,

    Thank you for the info. I will make some calls first thing tommorrow.

    Could you or anyone reading explain to me what the "Juicing and Smoothies" terminology on this site means?

    Thank you,
    gkoziarski

    To anyone that is reading.....

    People tell me that I can't do anything more than just be there for my brother, but I just do not want to except that from people who have never experience this.

    I want to know from anyone, if those people are right and that I could only just sit around and do nothing. I want to do something!!!

    I am not sure how to act around my brother. He is very depressed and all he wants to do is stay in his room. I am not sure if I should just let him be, or try to get him out of the house to get his mind off of the bad news. I try to be strong in front of him, but I know he could sense my concern.

    I now am on a mission get more info from websites and from the numbers Bud gave me, but I need to do more.

    Maybe I am just a Drama Queen and am over thinking this. I am definitely rambling on like one. It just helps to type what I am feeling, so please ignore if I am irking you.

    I just am sick of all the 'sugar-coating' from everyone, I just want the brutal truth!

    OK...I feel a little better. I typed what was on my mind.

    All emotions put aside, for those who know, what do you expect from your family and friends, and how do you expect them to act. Someone needs to slap me on the face or something!

    -G
  • pattieb
    pattieb Member Posts: 168

    To anyone that is reading.....

    People tell me that I can't do anything more than just be there for my brother, but I just do not want to except that from people who have never experience this.

    I want to know from anyone, if those people are right and that I could only just sit around and do nothing. I want to do something!!!

    I am not sure how to act around my brother. He is very depressed and all he wants to do is stay in his room. I am not sure if I should just let him be, or try to get him out of the house to get his mind off of the bad news. I try to be strong in front of him, but I know he could sense my concern.

    I now am on a mission get more info from websites and from the numbers Bud gave me, but I need to do more.

    Maybe I am just a Drama Queen and am over thinking this. I am definitely rambling on like one. It just helps to type what I am feeling, so please ignore if I am irking you.

    I just am sick of all the 'sugar-coating' from everyone, I just want the brutal truth!

    OK...I feel a little better. I typed what was on my mind.

    All emotions put aside, for those who know, what do you expect from your family and friends, and how do you expect them to act. Someone needs to slap me on the face or something!

    -G

    Genia
    No you are not being a drama queen on this site it helps to get these things off your chest and ramblbing seems to help sometimes. Yes you should be there for him and you may have to take a hard core and get him out and about as long as he is up to it. Keep us posted we are here for you.
    Pattie
  • StacyGleaso
    StacyGleaso Member Posts: 1,233 Member
    Hi Genia,

    I was diagnosed stage 4 as well. That was Oct 2001...today I'm fine. Mine hit my liver, not my brain (could be there wasn't enough to latch onto up there, not sure!). Take each day as it comes. No sugar coating, this really does suck to have to go through any of this, but don't let the diagnosis dictate how your brother handles this. If he's able to be up and around, by all means, take advantage of that. Sitting around wallowing in everything will work against him. There are so many stories with happy endings, and he needs to focus on those, not the others.

    Taking a notebook to doctor appts is a great idea. That way, you're not trying to recall everything the doctor said on the drive home. If the doctors say something you don't understand, make them explain it as many times as necessary to understand it. They get paid for their service, so make them earn it. Also, don't let the doctors make him feel like this is something that cannot be overcome. There are new tests, meds, and procedures developing daily, and you should try to stay on top of them in the event your physician doesn't.

    Everyone on this site can and will support you and your brother through this segment of his life. In my opinion, only the strongest people are given things like this to handle, as you are supposed to learn something from it. For me, it was to live each day to its fullest, and not wait for the perfect day to do something. I think I speak for everyone here when I say to e-mail any of us through this site for information, support or just to vent...we have all been there and we all understand.

    Take care of yourself, too!

    Stacy
  • 2bhealed
    2bhealed Member Posts: 2,064 Member

    Nanuk/Bud,

    Thank you for the info. I will make some calls first thing tommorrow.

    Could you or anyone reading explain to me what the "Juicing and Smoothies" terminology on this site means?

    Thank you,
    gkoziarski

    Hello Genia,

    I would love to answer your Juicing and Smoothies question!! (she asked for it you guys)!!

    Juicing: taking fresh ORGANIC veggies and fruit (lots of carrots and greens --beta carotene) and putting them through a special juicer that masticates the produce, gives you juice and dispells the pulp (which you can compost). The end product being jammed packed with live enzymes--which equates LIFE! Eating meat is dead food but eating raw veggies and fruit is eating live foods. Live foods combat free radicals which are what can cause cancer. They are healing properties. In the colon foods like meat start to putrify and become toxic which is harmful to your delicate system during cancer. The key is to DETOX your system and not add toxins. It is also advisable to add protein powder and a barley green powder for all the nutrients. Green=life.

    Smoothies: personally I prefer blueberry smoothies since blueberries have the one of the highest levels of anti-oxident content. To this i add flax oil so you get your omega 3's and protein powder.

    Even the cancer society says we should have at least 5 servings of fruits and veggies per day I think.

    If you have more questions feel free to ask or email me.

    www.drday.com
    www.curezone.com
    www.hacres.com
    www.healthquarters.org

    Book to buy: Beating Cancer with Nutrition by Dr. Patrick Quillin

    A Cancer Battle Plan by Anne Frahm
    A Cancer Battle Plan Sourcebook by David Frahm

    The battle plan book is a testimony to beating cancer after all the chemos and radiations and stem cell transplants didn't work.

    My husband's boss's wife went through the whole chemo/rad/stem cell path and she was still full of cancer. She found juicing and is still alive today years later. The doctors told her basically they had done all they could do. She took matters into her own hands and started juicing, became a vegetarian, and voila! It worked!

    peace, emily the juicing maniac
  • gkoziarski
    gkoziarski Member Posts: 8
    pattieb said:

    Genia
    No you are not being a drama queen on this site it helps to get these things off your chest and ramblbing seems to help sometimes. Yes you should be there for him and you may have to take a hard core and get him out and about as long as he is up to it. Keep us posted we are here for you.
    Pattie

    Pattie,

    Thanks for making me feel beter. After posting my venting session, I felt awful, but after reading your message, I feel better. I think I just had to get it out and I now have my battle gear on and going full fledge with helping my brother win this battle.

    Thanks for your support,
    Genia
  • gkoziarski
    gkoziarski Member Posts: 8
    2bhealed said:

    Hello Genia,

    I would love to answer your Juicing and Smoothies question!! (she asked for it you guys)!!

    Juicing: taking fresh ORGANIC veggies and fruit (lots of carrots and greens --beta carotene) and putting them through a special juicer that masticates the produce, gives you juice and dispells the pulp (which you can compost). The end product being jammed packed with live enzymes--which equates LIFE! Eating meat is dead food but eating raw veggies and fruit is eating live foods. Live foods combat free radicals which are what can cause cancer. They are healing properties. In the colon foods like meat start to putrify and become toxic which is harmful to your delicate system during cancer. The key is to DETOX your system and not add toxins. It is also advisable to add protein powder and a barley green powder for all the nutrients. Green=life.

    Smoothies: personally I prefer blueberry smoothies since blueberries have the one of the highest levels of anti-oxident content. To this i add flax oil so you get your omega 3's and protein powder.

    Even the cancer society says we should have at least 5 servings of fruits and veggies per day I think.

    If you have more questions feel free to ask or email me.

    www.drday.com
    www.curezone.com
    www.hacres.com
    www.healthquarters.org

    Book to buy: Beating Cancer with Nutrition by Dr. Patrick Quillin

    A Cancer Battle Plan by Anne Frahm
    A Cancer Battle Plan Sourcebook by David Frahm

    The battle plan book is a testimony to beating cancer after all the chemos and radiations and stem cell transplants didn't work.

    My husband's boss's wife went through the whole chemo/rad/stem cell path and she was still full of cancer. She found juicing and is still alive today years later. The doctors told her basically they had done all they could do. She took matters into her own hands and started juicing, became a vegetarian, and voila! It worked!

    peace, emily the juicing maniac

    Emily,

    Let me tell you how thankful I am to you. It has only been a day that I have been going through these messages and I feel like I know you. As I read all of your messages, I LOL! (I laugh so hard that my husband thinks I am surfing porn) SpongeBob and you are like sunshine on a very rainy day. I know it sounds corny, but you are. I never knew how much these sites could make such a difference. I was so down yeasterday and now I feel I have a group of best friends to talk to. Thank you....thank you...thank you!!!!

    I am scheduling a meeting with my bro's oncologist early next week, to get more information on my bro's prognosis. It is really hard to understand all of this and I feel with all of the information I am getting from all of you, I am more prepared.

    I am going out today to get a juicer and stock up on the fuits and veggies. (Any suggestions on which one to buy?)

    Thanks again,
    Genia
  • gkoziarski
    gkoziarski Member Posts: 8

    Hi Genia,

    I was diagnosed stage 4 as well. That was Oct 2001...today I'm fine. Mine hit my liver, not my brain (could be there wasn't enough to latch onto up there, not sure!). Take each day as it comes. No sugar coating, this really does suck to have to go through any of this, but don't let the diagnosis dictate how your brother handles this. If he's able to be up and around, by all means, take advantage of that. Sitting around wallowing in everything will work against him. There are so many stories with happy endings, and he needs to focus on those, not the others.

    Taking a notebook to doctor appts is a great idea. That way, you're not trying to recall everything the doctor said on the drive home. If the doctors say something you don't understand, make them explain it as many times as necessary to understand it. They get paid for their service, so make them earn it. Also, don't let the doctors make him feel like this is something that cannot be overcome. There are new tests, meds, and procedures developing daily, and you should try to stay on top of them in the event your physician doesn't.

    Everyone on this site can and will support you and your brother through this segment of his life. In my opinion, only the strongest people are given things like this to handle, as you are supposed to learn something from it. For me, it was to live each day to its fullest, and not wait for the perfect day to do something. I think I speak for everyone here when I say to e-mail any of us through this site for information, support or just to vent...we have all been there and we all understand.

    Take care of yourself, too!

    Stacy

    Stacy,

    Wow...from what the doctors were telling me, I assumed the worst. They told him that being on Stage 4, he only has 6 months to live and I got so mad at them that wanted to punch them!

    I am so glad to read that you are fine. I am going to church in a few and will pray my heart out for all of you.

    Just now I found out from my sister that when they ran tests on the parts of the colon\rectum they recently removed, the tests were negative. The surgeon told her that the chemo/radiation did it's job, but I am confused as to why they took it out in the first place. I was not able to be at my brothers appointment yesterday, so I do not know all the info. Does this sound right to you that they would remove something that showed negative?

    Maybe I need to research on this more, but why is it that the cancer attached to my bro's brain and not the liver? Is this just how it is? You really don't know what organ it will pop up on next?

    I really appreciate your advice and support.
    -Genia
  • spongebob
    spongebob Member Posts: 2,565 Member
    Ahoy, Genia!

    Well, I certainly can't let you hear from emily (my smoothie arch-nemesis)and not from me!

    You are doing an awesome thing by coming here looking for info to help your brother with. Information is one of your best weapons. Your best weapon is your attitude. You will hear a lot of cancer survivors talk about their 'tude. It's really important - and it sounds like your brother may have misplaced his. Something you can do is help him find it.

    No doubt he's scared as hell. We've all been there to one extent or another. It's normal and we wouldn't be human if we weren't (even emily gets scared, I bet).

    OK, you have a lot of good info here between bud's websites and emily's juice recepies. Here's another hot tip - go out and buy the book: Chicken Soup for the Surviving Soul and read it tonight. Then give it to your brother and make him read it. It's about surviving cancer. It's loaded with reat stories of people who survived - and some whose fight ended too soon. But the beauty of it is that each and every one of these people loved life and cherished it. And that's what kept them in the fight.

    This place is an absolute refuge - you can come here anytime to vent, to ask questions, to trade smoothie recepies, anything you want - and nobody is going to judge you or give you a hard time unless you break the one golden rule of the semi-colon club "No **** allowed" (get it? Colon cancer? no ****... Anyway...

    Hang in there and keep doing what you're doing - we're all behind you (no pun intended...)

    - SpongeBob
  • 2bhealed
    2bhealed Member Posts: 2,064 Member

    Emily,

    Let me tell you how thankful I am to you. It has only been a day that I have been going through these messages and I feel like I know you. As I read all of your messages, I LOL! (I laugh so hard that my husband thinks I am surfing porn) SpongeBob and you are like sunshine on a very rainy day. I know it sounds corny, but you are. I never knew how much these sites could make such a difference. I was so down yeasterday and now I feel I have a group of best friends to talk to. Thank you....thank you...thank you!!!!

    I am scheduling a meeting with my bro's oncologist early next week, to get more information on my bro's prognosis. It is really hard to understand all of this and I feel with all of the information I am getting from all of you, I am more prepared.

    I am going out today to get a juicer and stock up on the fuits and veggies. (Any suggestions on which one to buy?)

    Thanks again,
    Genia

    Hi Genia,

    SO glad you have found your tribe of buddies to hold your hand through this. We all need 'em.

    I prefer the Champion Juicer. I have had the JuiceMan Juicer but I found that the Champion gives more output per veggie and it's easier to clean for me. If you follow Gerson's recommendations (do a Google search on Max Gerson--juicing guru for curing cancer) you will juice 12 times a day. That gets to be alot. I juiced at least three times 1 quart of juice. That was actually too much at a time but ya live and learn! Point is you want to make it as easy as you can.

    I would discourage you from buying a cheap juicer from say Target. I found my juicer at www.discountjuicers.com They have very good prices and you can compare a whole bunch at once.

    The organic twist is also very important to the equation. You do not want to be adding toxins while trying to detox. It sometimes is more pricey but it is worth it in the long run IMO. Otherwise you have to soak and scrub and again=more work.

    So Genia, we welcome you with open hearts and arms to our little corner of light in the darkness. You are an awesome sister voicing your concern and taking action. My sister died 11 years ago. She was very very ill when she discovered juicing through a JuiceMan infomercial--he had cured his cancer through juicing. My other sister moved in with her to be her personal cook and juicing preparer. But then she got pregnant and couldn't look a carrot in the eye. The juicing went out the window but my sister was able to have a beautiful baby girl before she died. The baby was 5 months old when her mama passed. She even nursed her for 6 weeks even though she was skin and bones. It was incredible. It came to a point where my sister couldn't even lift the baby anymore but would just lay in bed and admire her and sing to her.

    So if you can get your brother juicing and detoxing it could really help. There are plenty of good books on the subject too. A wonderful resource is "Prescription for Nutritional Healing".

    Hope this helps.

    peace, emily who stays an interesting shade of orange
  • 2bhealed
    2bhealed Member Posts: 2,064 Member
    spongebob said:

    Ahoy, Genia!

    Well, I certainly can't let you hear from emily (my smoothie arch-nemesis)and not from me!

    You are doing an awesome thing by coming here looking for info to help your brother with. Information is one of your best weapons. Your best weapon is your attitude. You will hear a lot of cancer survivors talk about their 'tude. It's really important - and it sounds like your brother may have misplaced his. Something you can do is help him find it.

    No doubt he's scared as hell. We've all been there to one extent or another. It's normal and we wouldn't be human if we weren't (even emily gets scared, I bet).

    OK, you have a lot of good info here between bud's websites and emily's juice recepies. Here's another hot tip - go out and buy the book: Chicken Soup for the Surviving Soul and read it tonight. Then give it to your brother and make him read it. It's about surviving cancer. It's loaded with reat stories of people who survived - and some whose fight ended too soon. But the beauty of it is that each and every one of these people loved life and cherished it. And that's what kept them in the fight.

    This place is an absolute refuge - you can come here anytime to vent, to ask questions, to trade smoothie recepies, anything you want - and nobody is going to judge you or give you a hard time unless you break the one golden rule of the semi-colon club "No **** allowed" (get it? Colon cancer? no ****... Anyway...

    Hang in there and keep doing what you're doing - we're all behind you (no pun intended...)

    - SpongeBob

    Sponger you're darn tootin' I get scared. I have been crabby the past week cuz my upcoming trip to Mayo is next week and I am always so very apprehensive about it. I'm due for CT and chest x-ray. So I come here for fun and games but around the house I have been crabby-patty. Well not today cuz tomorrow hubby and I take our R&R trip...no kids....cabin tucked in the woods on a frozen lake...fireplace....Victoria's Secrets.....oh la la!

    So yes, for the record I get scared and I hate the fear. No one but US understands what we live with everyday.

    I made an analogy the other day that cancer is like a mass murderer who breaks into your house and grabs you by the hair and puts a knife to your throat. You may wrestle him away and he runs off but you know he's lurking out there and no one can stop him and he knows where you live. Do you think for a minute not one of us would be scared knowing it's happened once and he can come back for you? I may juice and do yoga and eat well, and pray and avoid toxic people and journal and seek counseling, but ultimately my outcome is in God's hands and my faith is in Him and not the bean sprouts. Do I trust Him enough to live with whatever outcome He chooses? That is the question.

    Coming here lightens the burden. For all of us.

    peace, emily who waxes spiritual tonight
  • gkoziarski
    gkoziarski Member Posts: 8
    2bhealed said:

    Hi Genia,

    SO glad you have found your tribe of buddies to hold your hand through this. We all need 'em.

    I prefer the Champion Juicer. I have had the JuiceMan Juicer but I found that the Champion gives more output per veggie and it's easier to clean for me. If you follow Gerson's recommendations (do a Google search on Max Gerson--juicing guru for curing cancer) you will juice 12 times a day. That gets to be alot. I juiced at least three times 1 quart of juice. That was actually too much at a time but ya live and learn! Point is you want to make it as easy as you can.

    I would discourage you from buying a cheap juicer from say Target. I found my juicer at www.discountjuicers.com They have very good prices and you can compare a whole bunch at once.

    The organic twist is also very important to the equation. You do not want to be adding toxins while trying to detox. It sometimes is more pricey but it is worth it in the long run IMO. Otherwise you have to soak and scrub and again=more work.

    So Genia, we welcome you with open hearts and arms to our little corner of light in the darkness. You are an awesome sister voicing your concern and taking action. My sister died 11 years ago. She was very very ill when she discovered juicing through a JuiceMan infomercial--he had cured his cancer through juicing. My other sister moved in with her to be her personal cook and juicing preparer. But then she got pregnant and couldn't look a carrot in the eye. The juicing went out the window but my sister was able to have a beautiful baby girl before she died. The baby was 5 months old when her mama passed. She even nursed her for 6 weeks even though she was skin and bones. It was incredible. It came to a point where my sister couldn't even lift the baby anymore but would just lay in bed and admire her and sing to her.

    So if you can get your brother juicing and detoxing it could really help. There are plenty of good books on the subject too. A wonderful resource is "Prescription for Nutritional Healing".

    Hope this helps.

    peace, emily who stays an interesting shade of orange

    Emily,

    My heart goes out to you and your family. Having a baby is the best thing in the whole entire world. I am so happy that your sister got to experience the joy it brings. I wish all the best for your niece and for you.

    Thanks for the tips. I had just bought a juicer from Target yesterday and am on my way to return it. I am going to purchase the Champion Juicer as you suggested.

    Thanks again,

    Genia
  • StacyGleaso
    StacyGleaso Member Posts: 1,233 Member
    2bhealed said:

    Sponger you're darn tootin' I get scared. I have been crabby the past week cuz my upcoming trip to Mayo is next week and I am always so very apprehensive about it. I'm due for CT and chest x-ray. So I come here for fun and games but around the house I have been crabby-patty. Well not today cuz tomorrow hubby and I take our R&R trip...no kids....cabin tucked in the woods on a frozen lake...fireplace....Victoria's Secrets.....oh la la!

    So yes, for the record I get scared and I hate the fear. No one but US understands what we live with everyday.

    I made an analogy the other day that cancer is like a mass murderer who breaks into your house and grabs you by the hair and puts a knife to your throat. You may wrestle him away and he runs off but you know he's lurking out there and no one can stop him and he knows where you live. Do you think for a minute not one of us would be scared knowing it's happened once and he can come back for you? I may juice and do yoga and eat well, and pray and avoid toxic people and journal and seek counseling, but ultimately my outcome is in God's hands and my faith is in Him and not the bean sprouts. Do I trust Him enough to live with whatever outcome He chooses? That is the question.

    Coming here lightens the burden. For all of us.

    peace, emily who waxes spiritual tonight

    Emily you are SO good with words! And just for the record, be careful with the Victoria's Secret ammo...you already have 5 kids! Cheaper by the half dozen you think? Have a great trip, will send all positiveness your way for perfectly clean CT scans and x-rays...

    Have a safe trip, and let us know how things work out...(with the tests, not necessarily the lingerie...tee hee)

    Stacy
  • 2bhealed
    2bhealed Member Posts: 2,064 Member

    Emily you are SO good with words! And just for the record, be careful with the Victoria's Secret ammo...you already have 5 kids! Cheaper by the half dozen you think? Have a great trip, will send all positiveness your way for perfectly clean CT scans and x-rays...

    Have a safe trip, and let us know how things work out...(with the tests, not necessarily the lingerie...tee hee)

    Stacy

    Trip was great! Put me in such a better mood that my upcoming trip to Mayo is not messing with me today. Let's hope the afterglow will remain for the next couple days.

    Thanks for the compliment. It means alot. :-)

    peace, emily the wordsmith