went back to work and hear different comments

hounddog · October 2003

I started back to work and hear different comments like did a lawn mower run over your hair or you look like a boy you need a wig and one person said why aren't you wearing bras and I said I 'am she said no the kind with protesis and I thought to my self I'm comfortalbe the way I am .
I'm a people greeter at Wal-Mart so I have to put up with comments even though they hurt alot if you know what I mean .How does any one put up with comments ? I try to be nice and I tell people they look nice and thank you for shopping at wal-mart .I also tell them they have a beautiful smile and it makes a day go better . I have made a difference in some peoples lives . I think God puts us through tests so we can make a difference in the lives of others.
Marilyn

jeancmici · October 2003

Marilyn,

I am sorry you are getting comments from people who are so thoughtless and ignorant. These are the shoppers, I'm assuming, and not your co-workers.

I guess we have to just write some people off as not worthy of our replies.

We do not seem to have greeters at our WalMarts here in Buffalo area - if so they just make sure carts are ready to grab but do not greet.

I am sending you my best wishes for better days - just for now be thankful that you are feeling well enough to work and have come through the treatments - and hair does grow.

Would you care to share your location in the U.S.A. but of course that doesn't mean a whole lot - there are stupid, mean people all over - just more in some areas!
Hugs, Jean

jake10 · October 2003

How awful for you! I can not imagine people making such comments. Ignore them if you can if not tell them you had cancer and I bet they will shut up!
I have only had support and encouragement from people around me. Once, soon after surgery, I went to WalMart and was too weak to walk around, I saw the moterized wagon and asked the greeter about it. He stopped what he was doing, showed me how to use it and rode along for a test ride. Made me feel so good and less of a freak!
You just keep being the bright happy person you are, keep commenting on those smiles and pretty babies. Spread your sunshine! Good Luck, Beth

DeeNY711 · October 2003

Congratulations on returning to work! That is an enormous triumph in itself! I'm working very hard to regain the ability to do the same. We are in the same boat as far as hair. I announced my plan to go wigless commencing on Halloween when I came in for radiation therapy, but later in the day I was thinking about going out and about with my inch long hair starting Monday. This Monday, it is either return to the gym after a long absence wearing a wig, knowing it is going to fall off and freak everyone out, or not wear the wig at all. I gave up on finding a comfortable bra and switched to camisoles with pockets. They now come with skinny straps that don't peep out of tee shirt necklines. When I'm going to radiation therapy or an oncology appt, I skip even that because it is time-consuming to take it off and put it back on. We'll be comfortable with the way we are together, Marilyn. We live in a world where people are accustomed to saying whatever thoughts cross their minds. Hugs, Denise

Snookums · October 2003

Perhaps in a confident yet, kind manner proudly state the truth and maybe in a way you will ducate. By stating "I am a cancer survivor!" You will in a kind way completely make them aware of the inappropriateness of the comment and give them a chance to get out gracefully without conflict. For the small few that still "just don't get it" pray for them at that second to gain understanding and move on because honestly, if you remembered EVERY nice comment the total would surely outweigh the negative. My prayers and Kind Thoughts are with you.

blossomtime · October 2003

Good for you by getting back to work. I cannot believe the insensitive comments some people can make. I worked the whole time during 8 months of chemo and 5 weeks of radiation but I am a single mom with no financial help from my ex. I did what I had to do with a lot of help from my coworkers and employer. God bless them. Anyway I wore a wig the whole time. Alot of people never even have realized it is a wig. Anyway, October 14 is my "coming out party". I am having my hair highlighted and a trim and will finally be without my wig. I am a little anxious about this because it is really short. It is more like a close cropped haircut but I am tired of my wig and is gets so hot. Anyway I am going to try to make this a good experience by trying to use humor and have some fun with it. Wish me luck and you keep your chin up, you are doing great. Sharon

mc2001 · October 2003

Hi Marilyn!
Unfortunately there are a lot of dumb **** walking the planet. These are the people that shift gears before using the clutch! DON'T put any stock into what they say! At first I would take offense, but then I realized that it made no sense to worry about what one person with s**t for brains said, while fifteen others gave me encouragement. One time I had just come home from a two month *stint* in the leukemia ward. One woman I worked with knew that my hair could not grow back. Out of everyone in the leukemia ward, one other young man besides me have not had our hair grow back more than 15-20%. Anyway... in front of a lot of people she told me I dont look good with no hair. I totally understand it is much more emotionally difficult for women to lose hair,.. but the fact is that there are real idiots walking among us.... If you are confortable enough, think of a good comeback that lets them know you had cancer and that there comment only makes them look bad because "You Don't Care!" God bless!
-Michael
PS: I love Wal-Mart.... or Wally World as some other WalMart employees have called it! The greeters like to give me those little stickers for kids! So I wear them when I shop!

went back to work and hear different comments

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