Just finished last chemo treatment...kind of sad????

luna20
luna20 Member Posts: 13
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
On thursday, I finished my last chemo treatment. It was one of the hardest. I vomited for 3 days straight until only blood came out, and pulled my ribs out. I guess why I am writing is to wonder if anyone else felt kind of sad when it was over. I am happy I don't have to have chemo anymore, but now I feel scared, and sad. I feel like the last five months of my life were the hardest, and I fought so hard to live, and now I am not sure how to appreciate life. I feel like I am suppose to make all these changes in my life, to desrve the chance I have to live. I dont know maybe this sounds crazy. My friends and family don't really understand, I just feel lost. I am 28 yrs old and I am sitting here trying to figure out how to make it to 80???? Sorry this is such a depressing message I just feel worse than when I was going through treatment.I feel like now I am asking the question WHY ME? Any thoughts would be great...Thank you, and you are all in my prayers

Comments

  • grandma
    grandma Member Posts: 162
    #2
    congratulations!!!!!
    I don't know how to cheer you up, but know that my heart goes out to you.
    I have read on here that others have felt the same way as you. like they lost their lifeline... but you have to take one day at a time, and as they say, get on with your life..easy for me to say right? well Thurs the 25th will be my last one also. right now I think I will be ok with it, am looking forward to getting them over with. My husband is ill, so when I am done I will be able to care for him better. If I didn't have other worries, maybe I would feel as you do. who knows maybe I will, but I have to focus on someone else right now.
    Keep the GOOD LORD in your life and talk to HIM often. thats what keeps me going.
    LOVE, HUGS AND PRAYERS---Flo
  • banker
    banker Member Posts: 317 Member
    #3
    Hi, don't feel bad, I have been there too. Your life has been controlled by BC all this time, you had the security of the doctors and nurses, now YOU are in control. Yes it is scary, we wonder, will it come back, why.
    Oh I know it so well. This is my second time around, I was devestated. Took a couple of weeks and here I am fighting again. I thought I lived right, did all the right things and still I got BC again. I will not let it get me down. I hope you do the same, try to get priorities in place and plan your future, you are so young, so much to live for. As time goes by , it gets easier. Do things you like to do and take CONTROL, you can do it. I f you need someone to talk to you can reach me at
    charmin@froggernet.com
    Take good care of yourself... Love Emmi
  • cekramer
    cekramer Member Posts: 33
    #4
    Hey!

    Go treat yourself! End of treatment is scary but now you can do all the things you've always wanted to do. Have you made your list yet? I finished a year ago (I'm 35 now) and was scared to death. But you will have checkups at least every 3 months between the surgeon, onco and all just to be safe. Do you have a support group you can go to? I found an awesome one with young adults at the Wellness Community here. We all hang out socially and share our fears about recurrence. It really helps. Just remember God knew you could handle this challenge and you've made it this far. Take care.
  • ksfc
    ksfc Member Posts: 251
    #5
    cekramer said:

    Hey!

    Go treat yourself! End of treatment is scary but now you can do all the things you've always wanted to do. Have you made your list yet? I finished a year ago (I'm 35 now) and was scared to death. But you will have checkups at least every 3 months between the surgeon, onco and all just to be safe. Do you have a support group you can go to? I found an awesome one with young adults at the Wellness Community here. We all hang out socially and share our fears about recurrence. It really helps. Just remember God knew you could handle this challenge and you've made it this far. Take care.

    From what I understand, it's not unusual at all to feel sad when treatment is over. I finished chemo the end of May and am halfway through radiation, and I think I'll be relieved, but a little sad when it's over. Treatment is something positive you do everyday to get well and stay well. It really defines your life while you're in the midst of it. Plus you make a lot of new friends and acquaintances through treatment.
    It actually becomes almost a social outing.
    Don't be too hard on yourself. Figure it's just another stage you need to pass through on your way to wellness. Diane
  • bubbles
    bubbles Member Posts: 2
    #6
    cheer up you are on the uphill now you will go through alot of different emotions i did and i promise things will begin to look alot brighter soon!!!! Bonnie Langdale in NC
  • vjc5199
    vjc5199 Member Posts: 101
    #7
    congrats on no more chemo!!! when i finished mine it was sort of unexpected. i had a CT scan done on a place on my stomach and when the results came back it was gone so my onc decided i didn't need anymore chemo. most everyone else has a set number of treatments but mine just stoppped. at first, i was so excited about not having to go through that anymore. then it sort of hit me----now what!?! my whole schedule was made around doc visits and tests. now i have all the time i want to do something else and i have no idea what to do. wierd, huh? remember though, just because we're finished with one part of our treatment doesn't mean that we are through fighting. we are all in this together. God bless. Vicki :)

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