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hollykiona · May 2001

Hi, everyone. I am 27 yrs old and was diagnosed with bc in mid-March. I had a lumpectomy and axillary dissection (12/21 nodes positive), after the surgery was told that I was at Stage IV because of a positive node above my clavicle. I am also negativer ER/PR and Her-2. Until the last few days I'd been mostly upbeat, but... I moved to Chicago from Texas a year and 1/2 ago, and I don't have any friends here. My family and friends are scattered and I fear that they are going to forget about me when I need them most (now). Out of sight out of mind. My long-distance boyfriend is moving here in August, but right now I'm just so lonely and scared. I've been reading the posts on this discussion board for the past couple of days and everyone seems so kind. I could really use some encouraging words. I am taking Taxol weekly and will be done with my first of two (I think) rounds at the end of this month. Has anyone else done weekly Taxol treatments?

blackbandana · May 2001

Hi Holly, welcome to the board. I understand how you feel, I'm Irish living in New York, all my family are in Ireland. My friends have been wonderful, but they are not my family. I can assure you your family and friends will not forget about you, they are going through this with you every step of the way. Keep them informed, if you need to talk, just call them, if you need someone there just ask them to visit and don't forget we are always here to help in anyway we can. Take care and keep posting.

nancys · May 2001

Hello Holly and welcome, I did not do the weekly Taxol but wanted to respond to you anyway. My Taxol was every 21 days for 4 cycles. Opposite to you I am ER and PR positive and Her-2/neu 3+. I am just finishing my radiation treatments. Chicago is a BIG city and I'm sure you must feel very alone. My son and his family lived in St. Charles for a year and their neighbors were never friendly. It was a beautiful area with many beautiful homes, but everyone too busy to get aquainted. You are so young to be up aganist this beast, but your youth is no doubt a plus factor and you will reap the benefit of all the new cancer research going on right now. There are so many new and better treatments on the horizon. Cancer will soon be a chronic disease that is very controllable with medication. Holly, you will make many friends here on this site, just type in , anytime you feel lonely and someone here will respond. Sending a hug your way, NancyS

lindysu · May 2001

hi holly, I am so sorry you are in this boat too...I am taking taxol every 3 weeks but I was wondering how your side effects are with the weekly treatment, I've read that they are less when taken that way...I was going to ask my doctor about it, but never did. I only have one more taxol to go...the leg pains have gotten less with each treatment for me...your body is young and resilent and should help you bounce back...I have found reading books on survivors to be very encouraging when I feel weak..."chicken soup for the surviving soul"...will make you feel good...knowing others in much worse stages have survived and gone on ,gives you strength...I read them over and over, and constantly repeat positive life affirmations...I WILL survive too!
find a support group with younger people, ask your oncology nurses, they usually know
whats going on in the area. I find listening to meditation tapes helps alot too, especially in the middle of the night, when you can't sleep....remember, you're not alone, there's always someone here...lindy

jeancmici · May 2001

I know from my oncologist that the weekly taxol is given to have a cumulative amount greater than you could stand given every three weeks for four times.

It must indeed be difficult for you in a new place with breast cancer added to it. Maybe some of your friends and boyfriend could visit - spread out so you'd have company at times.

And I hope your co-workers will come through for you. One does sometimes have to ask if you need some help.

My cousin lived in Chicago when she had BC - they have some very good doctors there.

Good Luck and call on us when you want to "talk". People here are wonderful when you send out an SOS!

Best wishes, Jean

amy_ohio · May 2001

Holly,
I know what it feels like to be young and have breast cancer. I was 30 when I learned. I had my 31st birthday during my chemo. I had 4 Taxol- about 21 days apart. I bounced back from them faster than the A/C. I think being younger did help me. I tried to walk the day I had my treatments and took Alieve to help out. I stayed as active as I could..probably form my mental health just as much as my physical health.
Chicago is a great town- my sister lives there. If you have a great oncology nurse she may be able to help you find some young people to work this through with.
If you need something or have question, ask. I've only been looking at this websight for about a week and wish I would have found it sooner.
Amy

24242 · May 2001

Hi Holly,
Like everyone else I want to say how happy we are that you have found us. Like you I had moved to another province in Canada and had just been settled at my new job for 6 months, new relationship, I was 36 and the mother of a teen. I too had 11 nodes but I was stage three. E-mail me anytime and I will return as soon as I can. We could meet in the chat sometime if you like. I will keep in touch and you do the same. Keep on posting.
24242Tara

beckyl · May 2001

Hi, I too have been reading all the posts on this board for a while. While I can't say I am going through exactly what you are as far as breast cancer I do understand your loneliness and being afraid. I got my diagnois a little over a month ago, and have been struggling with coming to grips with it and trying to make a decision about what type of reconstructive surgery to have. I just emailed my Dr. to tell her my decision and to schedule the appt for my mastectomy. I moved to this area a year and half ago too, and am 8 hours away from all friends and family. While my family is being very supportive most everyone else acts like they are afraid of me. It's very hard going through this without a close girlfriend close by to share it with. If you want to talk email me. You can use my other email if you want -- it's bebu10834@juno.com
Hang in there.....I found another woman through my Dr. that went through exactly what I am, and she is putting me in with a support group and it is helping ALOT.
Becky

hollykiona · May 2001

lindysu said:
hi holly, I am so sorry you are in this boat too...I am taking taxol every 3 weeks but I was wondering how your side effects are with the weekly treatment, I've read that they are less when taken that way...I was going to ask my doctor about it, but never did. I only have one more taxol to go...the leg pains have gotten less with each treatment for me...your body is young and resilent and should help you bounce back...I have found reading books on survivors to be very encouraging when I feel weak..."chicken soup for the surviving soul"...will make you feel good...knowing others in much worse stages have survived and gone on ,gives you strength...I read them over and over, and constantly repeat positive life affirmations...I WILL survive too!
find a support group with younger people, ask your oncology nurses, they usually know
whats going on in the area. I find listening to meditation tapes helps alot too, especially in the middle of the night, when you can't sleep....remember, you're not alone, there's always someone here...lindy

Lindy, thanks for the message. Actually the side effects of the weekly Taxol infusions have not been bad at all. And over time I will receive more of the Taxol cumulatively that I would have breaking every few weeks. I guess this dose-dense treatment is being used more and more often, particularly for metastatic disease.) As far as side effects... no nausea, minimal fatigue-- so far-- (5 down as of yesterday), and some sleepless nights. (Thank goodness for Ambien.) I had one instance (after the third treatment) of dizziness/claustrophobia on the train and weak legs walking up stairs. Luckily it appears to have been isolated. Hair just started to thin last weekend, and it was bit more traumatic that I had anticipated. It's short and supercurly and no one else can tell at this point, but I think I'll give it a good buzz this weekend and spare myself self-imposed bathroom drama.

You mentioned your usage of meditation tapes; what do you listen to?

Thanks to you and all who've responded. What a big a help to know that there are other survivors out there who understand and are not bashful about sharing their experiences.

Will keep posting, definitely!

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