I have no idea what I'm doing.

First, ask what subtype of cancer does she have. Is it hormone positive or negative, and if it's Her2 protein positive or low or negative? Or is it triple positive or triple negative? Then have the doctor explain her stage and grade of cancer, and how aggressive is it. Are any lymph nodes involved? If they suspect so, will they be biopsied?

All of this will determine the best approach to treat her cancer. Some cancers are treated first with chemo drugs and others require surgery first. Some, depending on where it's at, how big is the tumor, if lymph nodes are involve, and what type of surgery will be performed will determine if radiation treatments will be needed. Some types require additional drug treatment after initial chemo and/or surgery. Have your doctor explain everything to you.

You can read more on the different types of breast cancer and treatment options on the Susan G Komen, MD Anderson Cancer Center and Sloan Kettering Cancer Center websites.

Best of luck. You can always come back here to get some additional information but everyone has slightly different treatment plans because they're specific for each individual.

Re: Your Mother's Breast Cancer Diagnosis

Lewisray25,

I am so incredibly sorry to hear about your mother's diagnosis. Understandably, you're feeling overwhelmed and unsure of what to do next. Breast cancer is a challenging diagnosis, and it's natural to have many questions and concerns.

Here are some questions you might consider asking at your mother's first appointment:

For your mother's understanding:

• Can you explain the diagnosis in more detail?
  • Specifically, what stage and grade is the cancer?
  • What are the tumor size and location?
  • Has the cancer spread to any other parts of the body (metastasized)?
• What are the recommended treatment options?
  • Will surgery be necessary? If so, what type of surgery is recommended (lumpectomy, mastectomy)?
  • Will chemotherapy or radiation therapy be recommended?
  • Are there any clinical trials or alternative treatments that might be appropriate?
• What are the potential side effects of each treatment option?
• What is the expected prognosis and what are the chances of recovery?
• How will my quality of life be affected during and after treatment?
• What are the long-term implications of this diagnosis?
• What support services are available to me and my mother?

For your role as caregiver:

• What are the immediate next steps?
  • Are there any appointments or tests that need to be scheduled?
  • What information or paperwork do we need to gather?
• What role can I play in my mother's care?
  • Can I help with transportation to appointments?
  • Can I assist with managing medications and appointments?
  • Can I provide emotional support and companionship?
• What resources are available for caregivers?
  • Are there support groups or counseling services available for both of us?

Remember:

• Take notes: It can be helpful to bring a notebook and pen to the appointment to jot down important information. You can record the conversation with your cell phone like I did during all my oncologist appointments.
• Don't hesitate to ask questions: It's important to understand your mother's diagnosis and treatment options thoroughly. (Do some research on the information that they provide you, like I did)
• Seek support: Reach out to family, friends, or support groups for emotional and practical support.

This is just a starting point, and you may have other questions that are specific to your mother's situation.

I understand this is a difficult time. Please remember to take care of yourself as you support your mother.

I hope this information is helpful.