The Untold Truth About Mental Health and Cancer

Oh my Dear Garland, thank you for checking in I feel for ya, I'm right there with ya, I have been there. I have been thinking about you and wondering how you are doing and am reminded each night as I go through my prayer list that your name is there with others with needs and have been praying for your delivery through this treatment and disease.

That was my first cancer and I agree with you this treatment puts you through the mill and stresses you at all points. I remember barely being able to get up and when I did I was so tired and beat up that it was usually to put some food and meds in the feeding tube including pain meds and then go back and lay down again. You are feeling the effects as you say just simple chores done everyday take on a completely different aspect making them seem so big.

I tell new H&N people who show up here to be aware this treatment can be BRUTAL and you dear Garland have certainly felt the full force of it emotionally, physically, and every other way possible.

Sorry, you had so much pain but I hope it was controlled pretty well with enough pain meds.

Glad you got the feeding tube, it makes things so much easier and so much less a struggle than without one. And I could not have made it without one and it seems you are in the same boat, but thanks to the feeding tube you can get through a treatment like this.

Just remember you are only four and a half months past radiation and I would imagine you are just starting to feel good enough in a reasonable sense, yet still beat up by the treatment and what you went through fresh in your mind, and you can't swallow yet, with little taste, and saliva not there. Trust me it is early out of treatment for you now and this will all come back. But keep in mind that I also tell people going through this treatment and coming out the other side you will not get off scot-free, I don't think anybody does. Your saliva may be less or taste not back 100% but still, you made it through the hell of H&N treatment and you are on the other side and Praise God even though you may not taste as well or have some other small issue to deal with he brought you through.

I was like you, I am finally starting to feel better but will I ever get my taste back, or my saliva, or will I ever be able to swallow again and eat again? I went through the same questioning period as I am sure many others did and now you are too and Garland I am here to tell you that you will get through this and get these functions back, maybe not at the same level but just the same thing will keep getting better.

It seemed like a long time but then one day while I decided to try testing eating again lo and behold I could swallow a small bit of food and even get some taste out of it.

I too had some food-sticking issues with my throat and in total underwent 4 dilations in total. They have to do a small amount at a time so they don't tear the esophagus. But it worked and made a big difference for me. You will find your throat to be slightly sore and I don't know how to explain it. It's a sort of an odd feeling when you try to swallow but will be gone in about 3 days, not a big issue or soreness just noticeable.

Again, keep in mind you are still early out of treatment and it will probably be about 8 months post-treatment till you will be feeling much better. And that's going to involve things like taste and saliva and other things affected by the treatment but be patient they will come back. That's the average time for this treatment recovery and for many, it is up to a year or more till we feel back to a reasonable normal. There are those that recover quicker and dear lady I hope you are one of them. My radiation oncologist nurse, whom I will never forget, sat me down and tried to drill into the seriousness of the treatment and how brutal it is and to prepare me for what was coming and she said "You might as well figure a year of your life to get this treatment and get through this and back to somewhat normal again", and you know what she knew her stuff because she was about right on in her prediction in my case. One year, but thank God he got me through and provided treatment and doctors and nurses and others who were so skilled and caring.

So now dear Garland it is a time of patience and waiting for your body to heal up and get your strength and stamina back, and though largely a waiting period but don't sit around, do all you can do, work around the house, take walks to do whatever you can do and stretch the limits doing it. The more active you can be I believe helps your body recover and using your muscles in walking, exercising, vacuuming the house or any other physical activity will bring strength and recovery and even faster with activity. Keep the nutrition going and the hydration because your body needs it to repair and rebuild and get you back in shape again. And you will be off the feeding tube before you know it and you can eat, eat, eat again.

So young lady I am celebrating with you and for you that you made it through this Brutal treatment and are out the other side now recovering.

Wishing You The Best

NEGU (Never Ever Give Up)

Take Care, God Bless

Russ

Hello, Garland, first off,  I would like to thank you for the nice letter, it is such a Blessing to hear from someone that my efforts have helped them through a difficult time or procedure.

This makes my efforts worth all the time and research and cancer events I went through.

I went through a lot with my 3 cancer situations and learned a lot as I went and decided I wanted to make the path easier for others traveling that route.

As difficult as my cancer events were they also gave me more knowledge to help others such as yourself.

So I just want to say thank you, thank you for such a nice letter.

Now I would like to address your letter a bit but not make it too long.

You have just gone through some of the most Brutal treatment for cancer, H&N cancer is the worst.

You say fog, I remember being foggy, mentally foggy and it’s hard to explain, not quite dizzy but truly as you say foggy, this is another normal leftover for a while but will slowly clear up. There is a situation called chemo brain and after going through treatment I believe it. You mentioned the fog so you know what it is.

Forget about how you look, how you talk, marks left for now from radiation, and other things like weight loss your body has just gone through a war, don’t be self-aware or have low confidence, stand strong, you have just accomplished one of the most difficult tasks imaginable. I still remember after I was pretty well recovered from treatment I looked back and said that it was the most difficult thing I have ever done in my life. I have said since I went through this that this treatment protocol shakes you to your core. I know it is unusual to go to a friend's house or a gathering and not eating or drinking it can sure make you feel odd but don’t, they know what you went through and they understand as best they can.

I must say I am surprised your medical people sugar-coated the process for you when they should have been doing the opposite. I would say all the people connected to my treatment made me aware I was in for a rough time and to prepare for the worst and hope for a little better. Feel free to educate your team, it may help others in the future.

Thank you for your love and appreciation but I think you are right God has me doing things and has me where he wants me and led you to this forum. God is at work. He has used me as his helper in other ways recently this year also outside of this forum."

Very well, Garland, I could go on here but I know you understand what to do. Above all this is a slow process, this recovery you are going through should be thought of in weeks and months and is not like getting the cold or flu and in a week you are recovered again. I think that is part of what messes us up with this recovery we are used to the normal stuff with a fairly quick recovery, not something that takes months.

Look I know you are tired, give yourself time and rest if you need it don’t push too hard just do the necessary stuff for now.

I can’t give you a time frame but I remember a period where all I wanted to do was sleep. This radiation beats you up. If I wanted to get something done I had to stay active on my feet and do it and get it done because I knew if I sat down in a chair I would fall asleep, I couldn’t stay awake.

So don’t be hard on yourself, don’t push too much, don’t be disappointed in yourself, you are recovering, your body has had a major assault on it relax and recover in the best way you can.

It is amazing what we take for granted, the simple act of swallowing is huge after this.

Were you given swallowing exercises to do the whole time? Because if you are on a feeding tube and even though you can’t swallow and get anything through you need to go through the motions with swallowing exercises because they say you can forget how to swallow and will have to relearn it.

I hope this helps, just be patient, and take your time, everything involved with or affected by this will come back but it is a slow process but it does happen.

Before you know it this will all be in your rearview mirror and you will be able to laugh about it.

Give it another 4 months and you will feel more like yourself.

If I can help with anything else or you just want to chat feel free to ask.

Wishing you and your family the best

Take Care, God Bless

Russ

As usual, I made the response longer than I had planned, sorry.

Looking back on your treatment and situation had me thinking especially when you said…

"Boy was that HELL 😵‍💫 I cried so much from sheer pain and lost all hope."

It reminds me that sometimes, somehow, and we don't know how we did it, even with prayer and trusting in God we still think "Will I make it can I make it through this" and we don't know how we made it but we look back and know somehow "I Held On" through no amazing powers of our own.

Take Care, God Bless

Russ