New Here - what comes next...

Matt06870
Matt06870 Member Posts: 4 Member
in Kidney Cancer #1

Hi, I have been reading and just wanted to say hello. 5 years ago the urologist found "something" on my kidney. The oncologist reviewed and said its quite small, no interference with kidney function lets monitor. Fast forward to March 2024 my MRI came back with 3cm Clear Cell Renal Carcinoma. Of course this stopped me on a dime. There was no evidence that it had spread (thankfully). July 1 of 2024 under went a Robotic assisted partial nephrectomy. According to the pathology reports they got it all.

The challenge(s) I am facing are post surgery. Nobody knew that I had cancer. I went into the hospital on Monday of a holiday week, walked out on Wed apparently cancer free as though nothing happened… nothing changed. In reality everything has changed - I am still recovering internally, not to mention the mood swings from March - until July were off the chart from depression to thankful it was caught. Post July 1 my entire life changed, but to those around me, family, work etc, it's just another day. Much like going to the dentist or something. I can't seem to focus on anything, I'm irritable and just feel like screaming "do you have any idea what I have and am going through?" but what I'm going through is mental, not physical so the understanding from my community isn't there. I'm expected to be the same person - I'm not - has anyone else gone through something similar?

and yes - before recommending - I do have a therapist who has been with me from the beginning.

Appreciate any input/assistance

Matt

Comments

  • dmaikui
    dmaikui Member Posts: 13 Member
    #2

    Thank God you're cancer free, what a celebration! How big was the spot 5 years ago?

  • Matt06870
    Matt06870 Member Posts: 4 Member
    #3
    https://csn.cancer.org/discussion/comment/1717139#Comment_1717139

    Hi thanks! it was basically nothing - I was at a DR appt and I had a trace amount of blood in urine and the doc said well, its not a big deal but lets do an ultrasound anyway. Doc called back and said, eh nothing about the blood but found something on your kidney - go to an oncologist. It was pure luck

  • dmaikui
    dmaikui Member Posts: 13 Member
    #4

    I don't believe in luck. It was found and you were cured for a reason. I'm taking a cruise in September, my mastectomy was June 10th. I went through some tough days and there was no one I could talk to about it. We all have a different journey, no one really understands our individual thoughts and feelings. I have a lot of faith and know someday I'll be with my God. Comfort and peace to you my friend. Sounds like you need to get away from it all and enjoy the beauty of what's left of our lives. You are loved.

  • Matt06870
    Matt06870 Member Posts: 4 Member
    #5
    https://csn.cancer.org/discussion/comment/1717143#Comment_1717143

    Thank you for the kind words they help immensely and yes I do need to get away, put it down and cherish what's left.

  • AliceB1950
    AliceB1950 Member Posts: 244 Member
    #6

    What comes next is the rest of your life. That's it, really. I had endometrial cancer and my first skin cancer in 2008. Then 2018 brought breast cancer and kidney cancer. (7 cm, stage 1b, grade 4). They are ALL in my past. I have no idea what the future will hold, but dwelling on it is letting cancer win even when you no longer have it. To be honest, my hip replacement was much harder than any cancer, with a longer recovery. I try to think of follow-up scans and appointments as routine maintenance to keep things running. Good luck getting past this part of the recovery.

  • Lynn_65
    Lynn_65 Member Posts: 64 Member
    #7
    https://csn.cancer.org/discussion/328347/new-here-what-comes-next

    Hi, my almost 3 cm clear cell was found “incidentally” due to gallbladder issue, no symptoms, in January 2020. Had a partial robotic nephrectomy the next month. Being found at such a small size I would think you have an excellent prognosis!
    Over the past 4 1/2 years my scans and blood work have been good. I am fortunate to have a very cautious oncologist who checks anything unusual out. But the mental stress and anxiety is real. I sometimes feel like the surgery was the easy part, it’s living with all the tests, scans, etc. that takes a toll. But God has been with me every step of the way.
    The people on this forum are a great support! I don’t come here everyday or even weekly just for my own piece of mind, but I do like to check in every so often. Some have been NED for a lot longer than me and it’s very comforting to see!
    Stay strong and with time, you too, will find your peace of mind! Enjoy each day to the fullest!

  • Matt06870
    Matt06870 Member Posts: 4 Member
    #8
    https://csn.cancer.org/discussion/comment/1717250#Comment_1717250

    thank you! It’s nice to know I’m not alone and to keep moving forward.

  • stub1969
    stub1969 Member Posts: 981 Member
    #9

    Honestly, Matt, what comes next is up to you. You have a choice—allow yourself to be consumed with cancer thoughts or find a way to cope with the fact you had cancer. Don't get me wrong, cancer will always be part of your story and I don't think you'll ever forget, but that doesn't have to be a bad thing. The key is not to let it take over your life. You're on the right track with healing by finding this site and allowing others with a similar experience to help you. Members here will come and go, but someone is always here to help.

    Wishing you only the best!

    Stub

  • Deanie0916
    Deanie0916 Member Posts: 626 Member
    #10

    Hi Matt, I hear you! It is not easy for others to relate when they can't see physical symptoms of the disease. I'm glad you reached out here, we understand. Yes your whole life has changed and cancer will always be in the back of your mind. I find trying to have a sense of humor helps a lot. Gratitude seems difficult but it helps also. Faith helps me the most, trusting that my times / days are in God's loving hands. God bless youwith lifelong NED scan results!

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