Hi I am new.

Hi. I recently got diagnosed with dais. Saw the doc who made it seem simple and straightforwar. Suddenly I start getting calls with appointments being set for me. Then another with the doc to go over more recommendations. I feel like I have no control over my life. No say in what happens to me. My life is turned upside down and no one understands. I had plans. A new job opportunity, things were looking up. I need someone to talk to. I don't know what to do. Need support, please.

Crafty-lady said:

New, scared and confused

Hi. I recently got diagnosed with dais. Saw the doc who made it seem simple and straightforwar. Suddenly I start getting calls with appointments being set for me. Then another with the doc to go over more recommendations. I feel like I have no control over my life. No say in what happens to me. My life is turned upside down and no one understands. I had plans. A new job opportunity, things were looking up. I need someone to talk to. I don't know what to do. Need support, please.

Hello, Crafty-lady! I love crafts too!

I know how you are feeling, probably all of us do. I have metastatic breast cancer, it spread to my bones, specifically spine and hips. I've been on this road for 3 years now.

You do have control, you always will, but I understand you're not feeling that now. It will change. Promise!

Do a Google search for support groups for breast cancer in your community. If there are groups, attend one at a time and join the one that clicks for you. I'm in a metastatic group, for all cancers, not just breast. We have both men and women in my group and we are a tight bunch! My group is part of Cancer Support Community, which has chapters all over the US. CSC came out of Gilda Radner's Red Door support group she formed many years ago to cope with her Stage IV ovarian cancer. After she passed, her husband (Gene Wilder) set up a trust to take her group nationally. 

Also check with you onco team as if there are support groups in your area, hopefully they will know about them.

catlady2 said:

just breathe

Crafty Lady, I know just how you feel. I get it!  Keep remembering that if you had to get breast cancer, be grateful that it is DCIS. All the appointments being set up can be terrifying!   Can't tell you what to do, but I can tell you that I was the queen of overeacting.   I thought the worst at every turn in the beginning.  Having the right medical staff treating you is essential.  Sometimes you just have to go through the hoops and keep moving.The doctor who talked to me after my sterotactic biopsy was awful.  When I questioned her about what DCIS really was she slammed down her papers and said "you have cancer" and left the room.   I was stunned and sat in my car and shook for quite awhile. My onocologist and radiologist were awesome and treated me like a person, not just a breast with a body attached.  

I hope that I do not have a recurrence but there is always that chance.   You can either live your life in constant fear or decide to enjoy your life so you will be in a healthy place mentally and physically to deal with whatever happens moving forward.   I stupidly put too much on hold for way too long.   Dr. Kristi Funk says she often sees a correlation between traumatic events in someone's life and the diagnosis of cancer 3-5 years later.   I found that interesting because I was just starting to feel good about things after an incredible difficult few years (deaing with aging famiy members' illnesses and death) and finally  getting to a good place then my diagnosis sent me back into a downward spiral.   

Please remember, if you have DCIS, it is non invasive and cannot spread in your body.  Your chance of being around for the at least the next 5-10 years are very good.  Please keep in touch, I know what you are going through and I made it out the other end.

https://www.health.com/condition/breast-cancer/dcis-breast-cancer

 

Thank you for your words of encouragement.

I do have IDC ugh so nervous

Yes my world was turned upside down when I was diagnosed initially end of 2007 then w metastatic breast cancer in 2017. Almost made it to 10years. It was like an avalanche BOTH times - one would think having gone thru round one, round 2 would have been better - it was NOT. But we find strength in God, family and friends and strength somewhere deep inside - we didn't know existed! Things will get better that's for sure. But initially there were so many decisions  to make and it was such a whirlwind. BOTH times. But here I am 2021 - wasn't sure I'd make it to 2020. Yes my life, plans and dreams all mushed up. But now there's new plans, making time for family cause these times are precious. And friends- those that are there for you. Makes you really appreciate the love and care they have for you. I've learnt to say thank you, say I love you cause you don't know when you can't anymore. I make time to spend w family and friends cause those times are SO important.

I think being as positive and taking everything a step at a time helps. I'm sending positive thoughts and prayers that things start to make sense and your treatment results in you completely overcoming this disease. But you need to stay strong n lean on those around you. When you are tired - REST. You don't have to be super anything!! You already are!! Just by being you