So Many Questions...

alicia2020 said:

I’m thinking of you today,

t519, and hoping your biopsy and ultrasound go well! it's a long process and you just have to keep putting one foot in front of the other!

On my way to get bloodwork the other day I drove through the hospital and medical complex where all my tests and surgeries took place. I shook my head and muttered several unpleasant sentences and four-letter words aloud. Then I laughed at myself! ? And thanked God that I am where I am now and I persevered!

At some point you, too, will be past the anxiety and unhappiness you are experiencing now and be better! Hang in there!

?, Alicia

P.S. I'm a former educator, also! I taught high school social studies for 11 years and was very happy to retire! Those ugly sentences and four-letter words?....succeeded by the feeling of thankfulness?...are similar to the ones that always occur when I drive by schools! It's the same "Thank God I'm not in there!" feelings! That's why it made me laugh!

I am so glad you perservered as well, and I know looking back has to provide you with many feelings. 

The laugh I had when you likened your drive by the hospital to the feelings when driving by schools made me laugh out loud. I needed that! 

Thank you so much for your well wishes. The one foot in front of the other approach is about what I can handle at the moment, although I must admit to feelings of stumbling along the way.  

I appreciate the kind words, Alicia, and I am hopeful that the anxiety and unhappiness will pass soon. Again, all of my heartfelt thanks for the encouragement. 

Harmanygroves said:

I had symptoms for a long time too...

...but like most women in here, thought "Wow, menopause sucks, but no more menstruation, so wheeeee!" (we kind of got screwed over, lol).

The biopsy may work for you, but I've never delivered a vaginal birth and I'm well past menopause (at 61, 62 on September 9th! yay for social security), so it seemed like the pain of it all might have been too great for me. Like pierced ears, things do tend to "get their seal on" over time, if ya know what I mean.

Many women in here strongly advocate doing a D and C, and getting it all looked at through the hysteroscopy that can accompany that. Scopes do see it all. A biopsy is a tool inserted in and used for the scraping and acquiring of tissue sample.

For me, I just put my foot down and said, 'Not doing a biopsy. Nope. Will do a D and C / hysteroscopy / polypectomy." That was a carte blanche (see what I did there, ha ha?) to scrape out all that goo and test it all. It was a minor surgery, and I didn't have to be awake for it.

If you intend to be "awake" for the biopsy, please ask them what kind of medication you can take to prepare. Pain reliever? lorazapam? prescribe a little something? You must not be allowed to suffer for one second. Why not? because you're an education professional!

Your son sounds amazing. I've been to Japan, and just loved it. 

So far, I've been to these:

Thailand

Cambodia

Laos

Vietnam

Myanmar

Malaysia

Canada

Mexico (Baja Peninsula, up and down; also, Cancun)

France

Scotland

England

And my favorite, probably.....SPAIN

You should probably plan a really good trip for once you get this worry and stress resolved. Seriously, plan a trip. Don't involve the lad just yet. Just you, planning. Maybe walk from Le Pui in France, down to the Pyrenees Mountains on the French-Spanish border.

 

I had a previous endometrial biopsy in Feb. 2020 which was benign. They did it when I was at a regular visit and, as I didn't know what it was going to be, it wasn't too horrible. I think part of my problem has been my high tolerance for pain (which is why I might have let things go a bit too long). It wasn't until recently that I realized that biopsy could have missed something. I hate to say that I totally failed to look and research further regarding this previously. It's what I am finding most challenging to process. I usually research everything...why didn't I do that for my own health?!? Frustrating.

Travel is always a good thing. I have spent most of my travels in Europe. Having worked in the French network of schools for more than 12 years, I have been fortunate to spend a good amount of time there when colleagues have returned to their home country. I enjoyed travels to Belgium, England, Scotland, Spain, the Netherlands, and Italy (where I would love to take my son). Canada and Mexico have great memories as well. I want to see more of the Asian countries. I have only been to Japan, but I have one teacher who we are sponsoring who is British but just arrived from Taipai where she taught for 10 years. Another teacher is originally from Singapore and has taught in India, China, and France. I love working at an international school because I love the openness of those who have lived and loved among other cultures.  I also can't complain as the constant new cuisines that make their way to the faculty room are a delight.  

I was a behavioral therapist before switching to education in my early 30s. I had worked with a group that had trainings in France and I fell in love with so much there. So many stories....

I mention my previous work as a therapist to also point out that we really never have a grasp on true empathy and understanding until we walk through something directly. I remember individuals who had either a diagnosis they were working through or had health anxiety they were dealing with and trying to overcome. I recognize now how far from the mark I was when trying to assist them with plans to calm their emotions. I understand now how sometimes it's simply having others who can listen and share with them their experiences. Hindsight is 20/20. O wish I could go back in time and provide better treatment than I did then, as I would have worked harder to find appropriate support groups for those who needed it. Still learning. 

Again, another small book on my part, but great to feel like I can share. 

Not sure what tomorrow holds, but I am going to keep pressing on....

Tiff

I had the in-office vaginal ultrasound and the endometrial biopsy today. I had an endometrial biopsy completed in February of 2020, but today's biopsy was a bit more painful. I had a different doctor doing it this time, but I was much more comfortable with her and the conversation while looking at the ultrasound. She took more time to answer my questions, and I found her to be more direct regarding information (which I tend to appreciate). Unfortunately, due to the Provera I am taking, she said it was a bit harder to get a good look at the endometrial lining. She didn't like that she wasn't able to see clearly, and she pointed to the area where the hypoechoic/heterogeneous lesion was located and mentioned that she felt it looked like a degenerative submucosal fibroid, but she wasn't certain and said it still may be a polyp. Her frankness concerning the importance of having a hysteroscopy due to getting a better look and making certain of what the "finding" is was helpful to let me know I am still on the correct course. She was also helpful in providing me a few names of doctors since she knew I was switching insurance. There were two other lesions mentioned in my first radiology report, but she mentioned that the in-office sonogram equipment made it more challenging to see. I wonder if I can call around for a new ob/gyn and ask about their sonogram equipment prior to using them?  

I was able to get back to work directly after the biopsy and worked the rest of today, but I am hitting the bed early and will be watching a movie from there tonight. 

Thanks to each of you who kept me in your thoughts today. 

Tiff

Harmanygroves said:

Well Done

Hysteroscopy is next, then. Given there is at least a fibroid, probably? can you just get that D and C, and let them biopsy the whole enchilada, as it were?

You are on track. I'm so glad. 

Deb #2

Next week, I will have all the information to provide to a new doctor with regarding my insurance and will be shopping for who can provide the hysteroscopy the quickest. I have one office I have called due to a colleague's referral, and they are part of the Stanford Health System group of doctors. I will be pushing for as soon as possible, as I know I have another colonoscopy in December due to a villous adenoma that was removed by EMR in July. Honestly, had that one not had abnormal changes on the margins, I think I might have been more relaxed with other medical issues that kept popping up. 
I will ask for "the whole enchilada" when I talk with the next doctor. I will also ask for a possible sedative. I took two Aleve before the biopsy today, and it wasn't too bad, but I believe a hysteroscopy would be a bit more painful. 

To unwind this evening, I tended to my hydroponic gardens. I love my veggies grown in these, and it's nice to have the fresh food around.

I wish you a great evening!

tiff