Scan time coming up...

Hello Fluff, I hear you on the scan anxiety.  I've recurred 2X and now we are following a growing nodule in my left lower lung.  I have lost count of all the scans I've had over the years (15 years).  Lately,  I have tried very hard to adopt Donna Faye's attitude that scans are to be welcomed and not feared.  They are the means by which our physicians can best help us.  Sometimes you get NED; sometimes you don't.  But I have come around to accepting that the longer I go on, the more I truly have confidence that there are new treatments coming along, and longer experience with the ones we know about thereby permitting more directed care.  I re-read your "biography."  You've had your trials and still, here you are.  I hope you get good news from your scan. Enjoy your family while you wait, and the last of your summer weather.  Be safe.  Best wishes, Oldbeauty

P.S.  Your bio says "cannabis oil is a life-saver."  Do you mean pharmacy-grade CBD oil?  What complaint does it address for you?   We have medical marijuana in our state.  I have started to use a 10:1 solution (CBD:THC) to see if I can get off the Lyrica I use for my neuropathy pain.  I am just in the stage where I take .5ml once a day to make sure it's not too much THC, i.e., that I can function during the day.  My doctor wanted to try a 19:1 ratio but I can't find that anywhere.  So, if you care to respond what do you use; how much; for what?  Thanks for any feedback.

Scan anxiety is such a real thing. Almost everyone I know has it, and why not?  Good luck to you! Hope the blood work is great. I am at the stage where they won't do a scan unless something serious presents itself. Just had my annual Medicare physical today, and a rheumatologist's appt.  Have had osteoarthritis for more than 20 years, and it decided this year to go out of it's mind. But in the end, I am still here, and trying to support all of our ladies. I am so happy that you came back to let us know what you are experiencing. I am here for you!

xxoo

Denise 

Fluff, I was 57, had just seen my last child graduate college and had spent the summer as a wrangler in WY, when I was told I had stageIII BC! Talk about a shock. I was finally going to be able to some ME things, but NO, 6 months of chemo, 6 weeks of rads and a gloomy prognosis. I did the fit thing where you throw pillows and scream at the heavens, but once I got that over with, this became my mantra and I repeated it daily: One day at a time. I then retired from teaching and took off to see the world - the US, Canada, Mexico, Thailand, Africa. I sold everything to be able to do this. I took jobs in these places - often teaching English. I had 25 years cancer free but then the tamoxifen I had taken created a tiny uterine cancer. So at 76, the hysterectomy, carbo/toxol and 25 pelvic and 8 brachys! A recurrence in 2018 and 2019. Last Oct. the doctor told me she had not been able to get all the cancer and I was in for a rough year. SURPRISE! My June 2020 scan showed no tumor where she had predicted! Even she had the rad doc read twice!

So, life from now on will never quite be as easy because there is that tiny fear all of us cancer folk have - will it return? So each of us has to find our own place of peace. I have taken up senior coloring and use the pages' backs as stationary to write my friends. I read a book a day and do water walking every afternoon. I also am working on muscle strength so come fall I can ride horses again. I am making the best of my 81st year. You'll find your ballast and the ship will sail well, even in stormy weather. Peace be with you. df

Donna Faye said:

Advice learned in 80 years

Fluff, I was 57, had just seen my last child graduate college and had spent the summer as a wrangler in WY, when I was told I had stageIII BC! Talk about a shock. I was finally going to be able to some ME things, but NO, 6 months of chemo, 6 weeks of rads and a gloomy prognosis. I did the fit thing where you throw pillows and scream at the heavens, but once I got that over with, this became my mantra and I repeated it daily: One day at a time. I then retired from teaching and took off to see the world - the US, Canada, Mexico, Thailand, Africa. I sold everything to be able to do this. I took jobs in these places - often teaching English. I had 25 years cancer free but then the tamoxifen I had taken created a tiny uterine cancer. So at 76, the hysterectomy, carbo/toxol and 25 pelvic and 8 brachys! A recurrence in 2018 and 2019. Last Oct. the doctor told me she had not been able to get all the cancer and I was in for a rough year. SURPRISE! My June 2020 scan showed no tumor where she had predicted! Even she had the rad doc read twice!

So, life from now on will never quite be as easy because there is that tiny fear all of us cancer folk have - will it return? So each of us has to find our own place of peace. I have taken up senior coloring and use the pages' backs as stationary to write my friends. I read a book a day and do water walking every afternoon. I also am working on muscle strength so come fall I can ride horses again. I am making the best of my 81st year. You'll find your ballast and the ship will sail well, even in stormy weather. Peace be with you. df

written Donna Faye.   

Donna Faye said:

Advice learned in 80 years

Fluff, I was 57, had just seen my last child graduate college and had spent the summer as a wrangler in WY, when I was told I had stageIII BC! Talk about a shock. I was finally going to be able to some ME things, but NO, 6 months of chemo, 6 weeks of rads and a gloomy prognosis. I did the fit thing where you throw pillows and scream at the heavens, but once I got that over with, this became my mantra and I repeated it daily: One day at a time. I then retired from teaching and took off to see the world - the US, Canada, Mexico, Thailand, Africa. I sold everything to be able to do this. I took jobs in these places - often teaching English. I had 25 years cancer free but then the tamoxifen I had taken created a tiny uterine cancer. So at 76, the hysterectomy, carbo/toxol and 25 pelvic and 8 brachys! A recurrence in 2018 and 2019. Last Oct. the doctor told me she had not been able to get all the cancer and I was in for a rough year. SURPRISE! My June 2020 scan showed no tumor where she had predicted! Even she had the rad doc read twice!

So, life from now on will never quite be as easy because there is that tiny fear all of us cancer folk have - will it return? So each of us has to find our own place of peace. I have taken up senior coloring and use the pages' backs as stationary to write my friends. I read a book a day and do water walking every afternoon. I also am working on muscle strength so come fall I can ride horses again. I am making the best of my 81st year. You'll find your ballast and the ship will sail well, even in stormy weather. Peace be with you. df

As always, your words of experience and wisdom help all of us, and i, for one, so appreciate your inputs. Words of wisdom! 

xxoo

Denise 

Armywife said:

Teaching!

Donna, I think you could put together a zoom class focusing on being brave and filling your life with joy and adventure, and all of us would just sit at your feet and learn how to LIVE!  Much love to you - thank you for encouraging us tonight - Pete and I are in one of the waves of grief over leaving the military and not making new friends quickly, and you assured us that our ship will sail!

Some states have lots of transplants. New Jersey is one of those places that my husband I moved to for his job and they had these newcomer clubs that were a lifesaver for adjusting ince it was our first cross country move. I think you said you were in NC now, so you could google North Carolina Newcomers Clubs to see if there is one handy to you. I highly recommend checking them out if you are having that kind of trouble with your move.

Donna Faye said:

Advice learned in 80 years

Fluff, I was 57, had just seen my last child graduate college and had spent the summer as a wrangler in WY, when I was told I had stageIII BC! Talk about a shock. I was finally going to be able to some ME things, but NO, 6 months of chemo, 6 weeks of rads and a gloomy prognosis. I did the fit thing where you throw pillows and scream at the heavens, but once I got that over with, this became my mantra and I repeated it daily: One day at a time. I then retired from teaching and took off to see the world - the US, Canada, Mexico, Thailand, Africa. I sold everything to be able to do this. I took jobs in these places - often teaching English. I had 25 years cancer free but then the tamoxifen I had taken created a tiny uterine cancer. So at 76, the hysterectomy, carbo/toxol and 25 pelvic and 8 brachys! A recurrence in 2018 and 2019. Last Oct. the doctor told me she had not been able to get all the cancer and I was in for a rough year. SURPRISE! My June 2020 scan showed no tumor where she had predicted! Even she had the rad doc read twice!

So, life from now on will never quite be as easy because there is that tiny fear all of us cancer folk have - will it return? So each of us has to find our own place of peace. I have taken up senior coloring and use the pages' backs as stationary to write my friends. I read a book a day and do water walking every afternoon. I also am working on muscle strength so come fall I can ride horses again. I am making the best of my 81st year. You'll find your ballast and the ship will sail well, even in stormy weather. Peace be with you. df

It's lovely to hear how happy you are and how well you are doing. Donna Faye. Congratulations on the wonderful scan results.

Flufff said:

Thank you all.

For your comments. It’s true that I’ve been quiet. I really needed a break from cancer. I loat my job so I’ve got way too much time on my hand. So I’ve picked up reading again. Im struggling so much with stamina. Or lack of. I’m 3,5 months out of treatment. (Doxil and carboplatin) That was one hard trip. Way worse than taxol. Only upside was not loosing my hair again.

I need to pick up some new hobbies. Now comes fall and winter. During summer, it’s just easier to keep occupied not? What kind of hobbies do you have? 

I go from one hobby to another like a maniac and while I get obsessed with one at a time, I keep doing the rest here and there. That way I don't have time to get bored or think too much.

Twelve years ago, I started with cooking. I read culinary school books while I tried chefs' recipes. It was like going to culinary school on the side. I do have a full time job. My boyfriend was happy.

Then I went into baking breads, baking cookies and cakes, decorating cakes with fondant, decorating cookies with royal icing, making gold-filled wrapped jewelry, paper cutting (banners/bunting, party decor). I think once I get to a comfortable level, the luster of learning a new thing wears off, so I have go into the next one.

Last year, during uterine cancer, I went back to crochetting and knitting.

This year, I'm learning calligraphy and embroidery. And I'm reading more. Believe it or not, through all this, all I really wanted to learn was sewing, and it never happened. I envy people who know how to sew. I could have made masks for people!

Enough ideas?

When I learned baking cakes and decorating with fondant and royal icing, I transferred all my knowledge to my sister in Ecuador. She has a cake business now. I just help with the designs every day, from the US. And with paper and jewelry, I was able to set up an etsy store for my aunt to sell the things I make. It's fun helping people too. I was going to try volunteering, but then the pandemic hit and now I can't.

When you get depressed and upset, you could certainly message people to talk, and it doesn't have to be abut the illness. I wish you health and lots of peace. And if you ever need anyone to talk, I'm here.

Primavera said:

Forherself

Forherself, I adored Love in the Time of Cholera. In Ecuador they made me read a lot of Gabriel García Marquez' books in high school, but I remember reading this one while I was here in the US already, because he wrote later, after getting a Nobel prize. Beautiful love story, and it was based on his parents love story.

and just found this book.  It was beaitully written.  That it is true is even more charming.