Immediate neuropathy

Hi all.  I'm new and desparately looking for info on how others have handled their neuropathy.  Background info:  colonoscopy in January because stool sample showed blood.  Dr. who did colonoscopy said there was a tumor but the pathology came back showing nothing.  Dr. wanted a new colonoscopy done right away to get more samples for pathology.  It took 7 weeks before they could get me in again.  Came back positive for moderately differentiated adinocarcenoma.  It took until mid April before I had resection surgery.  It took until the end of May before I was referred to an oncologist.  Stage 3A with 2 lymph nodes involved.  Surgery was considered a success and I was in remission.  But, adjuvant therapy was suggested. I would have declined but I felt they had done such a poor job with the colonoscopies and had no doubt let loose any number of cancer cells from poking at me and taking so long to do anything about it.  I am doing the FOLFOX treatment.  In my many, many, many discussions with the surgeon, oncologist, oncology teaching nurse and the hospital sociial worker I expressed my concern about side effects and being able to take care of myself.  I reminded them over and over that I am a single 58 year old woman and have no one to help me. They did not seem to think was a problem.  I was warned about all the side effects and that at about my 6th to 8th treatment I would start having neuropathy.  Wrong.  It started with the first treatment.  I was reminded to stay away from cold and it would be fine. I ended up in the emergency room with crazy chest pain and spasms after my 48 hour infusion. Oncology office said it had nothing to do with the infusion.  After 2nd infusion things got pretty bad.  Chest pain again and neuropathy barely tolerable.  Before my 3rd infusion I discussed this with my doctor and the only change he made was to give me a double dose of benadryl.  Neuropathy off the charts.  Could barely walk.  Told the nurses and was once agin told to manage the cold.  A friend brought me home but I was totally unable to manage on my own so my daughter picked me up and took me to stay with her family for a while. The pain in my chest was diagnosed as costochondritis by my chiropractor.  Said it is absolutely from the chemo.  Super painful and hard to breath and catch your breath.  I told doctor and his response was "yea, that sometimes happens.  I could go on and on.  I am seriously contemplating stopping treatment as I feel a decent quality of life (even if shortened) is much better than living with these side effects. And I have every single side effect I was told about plus more!  Its only my 3rd treatment - there is no way I can do 9 more.  Has anyone else experienced such extreme side effects so early in the treatment?  If so, how did you and your oncologist handle it?  Thanks for any feedback.  I am so frustrated and confused.