Just Diagnosed with breast cancer could use some insight

I am 62 and found out I have triple negative, a rare form. I found out in Nov. I finished one round of chemo., surgery and now in radiation. After that a pill form of chemo. then a trial. I consired getting a maastectomy, but was told it was a last resort if it came back to have it done. I would talk to the plastic surgeon and see what they recommend from their point of view. I had/have very honset doctors. 

Mine was a Stage 2B, I had three lymph nodes infected. The wait is the hardest. I wanted to get started ASAP as in yesterday, but it did and still is all falling into place. Just breathe and take it one moment at a time. The chatroom here is a great place to go to as well. I wish I had found this site when I first got start. Blessings

I had a meltdown on Friday when radiation called and said that the machine was down and the other machine wasn't compatible with my treatment! My husband calmed me and explained some things to me then I called one of my best friends. She has delt with cancer 4 times and has been cancer free for 10 years! She went on to explain that it is a good thing for my body to have a break like that.

I feel that I have three solid places I can go, my husband, Karlene, and now here. We really aren't alone, we just need to reach out. It doesn't matter what type of cancer you have we all have the same anxity and worry. Blessings

My husband is my rock! He hates that I have to put poison in my body to fight this, but understands why. He makes me laugh when I feel like crying, or just to hear me laugh. He will go to the appointments and treatments that I need him to be at. He will back my decisions, if he has a question about it he will ask. I don't have him with me all the time. He has a very hard time in clinics and hospitals, but like I said he is there when I need him. We have been married for 41 years and have been through alot, but nothing close to this. 

When I started sharing I was so shocked at all the compassion, careing people I had in my life. I had some come to me and tell me that they are a cancer survivor, I didn't know until then. I have one that is a 17 year survivor and is there when I need her. One of my best friend, whom I thought fought cancer 2 times told me the other day it was 4 times, and yelled at me for not coming to her more often! I told her yes I would because she told me I wounld not ever be a burden. Share, some may not understand and be hurtful, but many will surprise you.

Rememer there is this board and the chat room. That room has been a life saver, and I am new to this site. You are not alone in this fight! We are all stonger then we think. Blessings.

DonnaMae said:

I have just started sharing

I have just started sharing my diagnois with some  friends and hope I find the one who can relate or calm me down when I panic with the uncertainty.  My husband is scared about the whole situation but has shown a comasionate side I didn't know that I have seen before.  My mom who is 84 is doing research and calling and checking on me every day. I am so happy that I have found this site.  Thank you so much.

Hi, Donna Mae, I am 65 and was diagnosed with invasive ductal carcinoma in left breast, stage 1.  I elected to have a double mastectomy with reconstruction since my cousin told me that her aunt had had only one side done and so she had one perky breast and one floppy breast. I wanted both sides to match so that was my decision. This was all recent as my diagnoxis was mid April 2019 and my surgery was May 9th. I had to wait to find out if i needed radiation (did not) and also the results of oncotype which would determine whether or not I needed chemo. I finally got the results yesterday and was told that my oncotype was 26. 25 and under needs no chemo and 26 and above can elect to have it. My oncologist told me that if I did nothing, the chances were 80% that I would never get breast cancer again. He said taking an anti-estrogen pill (minimal side effects) once a day for 5 years raises that by 10% to 90% chance. Taking chemo, which would mean 4 shots every 3 weeks over a 12 week period (each shot would make me feel sick and tired for about a week, and after 2 weeks my hair would fall out), only increases the chances of not getting it again by 3% more. I chose not to take the chemo since it only increases my chances by 3% more, and the side effects are monstrous. This is my own experience. I hope it helps you. Angel

Dearest Angel,

It’s normal to have some anxiety or worries after all you’ve been through! You are a survivor and you are strong!! I too had never been admitted except for a C section when I had my daughter. But that’s life!! Things don’t work out the way we expect it to. Just take it one step at a time and YES count your blessings it’s stage 1, it gets better and you will slowly get back to being YOU!! 

Hugs and best wishes. God bless

Hi DonnaMae,

I had right side mastectomy last December, and opted not to do reconstruction.  Since surgery is taxing to the body and inherently carries some degree of medical risk, I opted to do the minimum that was deemed medically necessary.  I have no regrets about my decision. 

The healing process from any procedure takes time, and six months after surgery I am still not feeling completely back to normal on the right side chest and arm.  I'm glad I didn't choose to do anything more than waht was needed, because each additional incision would have taken time to heal.  I like to feel as healthy and whole in my body as I can, and extra procedures would have slowed me down a bit more.  Part of what's been tough in my case is that they did have to take a lot of lymph nodes, which means the right arm and shoulder need physical therapy and may never be completely back to normal.

I do experience some sadness and loss looking in the mirror now at my mismatched chest, but it's a sadness I can accept. It's a minor loss in the grand scheme--not one I needed to fight against, and of course I spend very little time looking in the mirror--I'm generally out living my life.  Living with a lopsided chest has not turned out to be a huge issue, really.  Insurance would pay for a prosthesis, but I haven't been motivated to get one yet.  I'm learning what styles of shirts are most flattering to my new figure, and even though it seems pretty obvious to me that the two sides don't match, I find that during appointments at the hospital, medical staff who are meeting me for the first time and reviewing my medical history still ask me questions like, "Let's see, did you get a mastectomy?" or, "Was it the right or left side?" or, "Was it bilateral?"  I guess they are looking at my face and not my chest. I find that I can be just as confident and contented and beautiful with a mismatched chest as I was with a symmetrical one.  My beauty is in my smile and my disposition--no one seems to care about my measurements.  I think they are delighted that I am alive and continue to be part of their lives.

Kate

Angelsings95 said:

Mastectomy

Hi, Donna Mae, I am 65 and was diagnosed with invasive ductal carcinoma in left breast, stage 1.  I elected to have a double mastectomy with reconstruction since my cousin told me that her aunt had had only one side done and so she had one perky breast and one floppy breast. I wanted both sides to match so that was my decision. This was all recent as my diagnoxis was mid April 2019 and my surgery was May 9th. I had to wait to find out if i needed radiation (did not) and also the results of oncotype which would determine whether or not I needed chemo. I finally got the results yesterday and was told that my oncotype was 26. 25 and under needs no chemo and 26 and above can elect to have it. My oncologist told me that if I did nothing, the chances were 80% that I would never get breast cancer again. He said taking an anti-estrogen pill (minimal side effects) once a day for 5 years raises that by 10% to 90% chance. Taking chemo, which would mean 4 shots every 3 weeks over a 12 week period (each shot would make me feel sick and tired for about a week, and after 2 weeks my hair would fall out), only increases the chances of not getting it again by 3% more. I chose not to take the chemo since it only increases my chances by 3% more, and the side effects are monstrous. This is my own experience. I hope it helps you. Angel

Thank you Angelsings95,

After reading about your experience, I am feeling better about my feelings not to undergo any further treatments.  Although I seem to be having issues with my oncologist about doing the oncotype testing.  I am going to try to insist on it. 

finbeck

finbeck said:

Chemo or no chemo

I am 72 years old, a widow with 5 grown children and grand children.  I was diagnosed with stage II B breast cancer.  I just a skin saving mastectomy, with sedenary lymph node removal.  The lymph nodes were positive so I have just had my second surgery to remove more axillary nodes.  Now every one is talking about chemo, radiation, and long term hormone therapy as the tumor was estrogen positive.  I am a firm believer in quality over quantity of life.  I have been looking over the side effects of the suggested chemos and hormone therapies.  It seems that for the next year at least there is no living, merely surviving from one treatment to the nest and then there are long term effects that last the rest of your life.  I am not sure at my age that I want to give up the living experience for the surviving.  I would appreciate feed back from those who have had treatments and their side effects

I'm also 72 and questioned how much treatment I was prepared to do at this stage in life.  They originally suggested 4 1/2 months of chemo, 3 1/2 weeks of radiation and 5 years of Letrozole after my lumpectomy.  A genetic test was done (Im Canadian) and chemo would only lessen my chance of recurrence by less than 1% so it was taken off the table. That was a major relief for me.  I've taken Letrozole for 2 months and have had several small side effects.....all manageable and they just come and go.  I power walk 40 mins a day to help my muscles and bones and get Acupuncture to help me with any mood swings and discomfort.  My thought is if side effects get too bad with Letrozole, I can have my medication changed or make a decision to stop taking it.  At least I will have tried. 

I also considered not doing radiation and just take Letrozole but my family doctor convinced me to take the treatment provided as cancer does recur and I will have known I did everything I could to stop it.   I keep in mind that many ladies who have gone through all the treatment and have gone on with their lives without major setbacks are probably no longer posting.

finbeck said:

Chemo or no chemo

I am 72 years old, a widow with 5 grown children and grand children.  I was diagnosed with stage II B breast cancer.  I just a skin saving mastectomy, with sedenary lymph node removal.  The lymph nodes were positive so I have just had my second surgery to remove more axillary nodes.  Now every one is talking about chemo, radiation, and long term hormone therapy as the tumor was estrogen positive.  I am a firm believer in quality over quantity of life.  I have been looking over the side effects of the suggested chemos and hormone therapies.  It seems that for the next year at least there is no living, merely surviving from one treatment to the nest and then there are long term effects that last the rest of your life.  I am not sure at my age that I want to give up the living experience for the surviving.  I would appreciate feed back from those who have had treatments and their side effects

I had to have a second surgery to remove potentially positive lymph nodes.   I just got the results and all were negative for cancer.  This reinforces my decision not to do chemo.  I am 90% sure I will not do the hormone therapy.  I am hoopeing to convince my doctor to monitor my hormone levels and when I recover from the second surgery, loose weight, exercise, and get healtheir.  

Sorry, DonnaMae for posting my new topic post on your thread.  I was in the wrong place.

I’m also sorry to hear about your recent diagnosis.  Hope to connect & chat with you around the forum.

Take care