Ode to Prostate Cancer
I found this on a Prostate Cancer website in the UK. It has "British humor" written all over it... . ....Poem by Chris Boothby
|We've had to learn a whole new lexicon
New words and medical babble
With such increased vocabulary
We should be bloody great at Scrabble!
A new website for our ailments
To help that constant toilet dash
It's called bladder trouble dot co UK
Forward slash, slash, slash, sla!
The Prostatectomy boys amongst us
Still cross our legs and flinch
The surgeon cuts away our prostate
…And we lose that vital inch!
And the ladies all remember
Those spontaneous, frantic humps
Now it needs to be pre-ordered
Using injections, pills and pumps!
But it has its compensations
And it is why we're still a catch
After taking you to heaven
There's the bliss of no wet patch!
And the side effects of hormones
Can play havoc with our bits
Girl's you're not the only ones
Who will hear those words, 'nice ****!"
|We still keep hedonistic lifestyles
But our demands have changed in tone
It's no longer, 'pass the e tabs'
It's, 'pass the abiraterone'!
Now ladies we salute you
You stand by us every knock
Your love is so unswerving
You really are our rock!
But let's just restore some balance
Keep our male egos all alive
Why is it as a gender,
You lot still can't bloody drive?!
Now no one chose to join this club
It's just how our lives unfurled
But, to steal the words of Carlsberg
" Probably the best club in the world!'
So let's continue with our battle
Fight this **** all the way
The tide it is a turning
And we will win through one day!
So bollocks then to PCa
Laugh at your Gleason score
And pledge that everyone of us
Will be back next year for more!
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