One Step Back

You know after my hysterctomy I knew what statistics say about when you should go back to work when you should heal ect..

it is all very logical and very clinically.  But no one really takes into account the emotional aspect of it.  Then having this new diagnosis on top of the most recent surgery I want to know when I will be ready emotionally.

There is no chart or timeline to tell us these things.  I think at this point in our lives we really have to listen to our bodies and our emotions. 

Just take care of you.  Do what you need to do for you. 

One day at a time.. as cliche as it is it really is a true statement.  Some days you will feel like more.. some days less but you will know when you are ready.  Some things just can't be rushed. 

Be patient with yourself (I am the worst at this).  Even though your body may be ready your mind might not be. 

After six weeks on my butt recovering from surgery, I figured I was ready to go back full time. My first day I made it until about lunchtime; I had to go home and nap. I think I worked from home the next few days. It definitely can take time to heal. It's a gradual process, so while some things may feel 100%, there may be other things at the same time that aren't quite there yet. I was fortunate that my employer has been exceedingly supportive with all of this. Though, at this point, the pressure is on me big time, as I fell behind quite a bit while recovering and just dealing with everything. 

You'll get there in time, whever there is. And you already know that "normal" may look very different from now on. Continue to be kind to, and patient with, yourself. It will pay dividends in the long run.

I know exactly how you feel! I have a desk job and was lucky to be able to work from home a little bit at the 5 week mark. I was exhausted by noon, but was able to get up, get in about 5 hours of work, quit at noon, eat lunch, nap, and then take a shower and get ready for the day. When I had to go back to work at the 8 week mark, I was not ready physically or mentally. However, my doctor was out of town, and the fill in doc only begruddingly wrote me a note saying I needed to stay home for 2-3 weeks max. I had no other choice but get up and drive in.

The big boss asked me how I was feeling one day, and I said I was just exhausted. She replied, "We are all tired, that's just part of life" and walked away. I was mad, sad, and frustrated. When you say that no one understands how we are feeling, you are exactly right. We look fine, so we must be fine, right? For some of us (like me), my cancer was removed, so I'm "cured" and have nothing else to worry about.

Take your time healing and getting back when you are ready. If you can afford to stay home longer, I highly encourage it. If I had it to do all over again, I would have started back with half days or even half days for half week for a little bit.

I can't imagine going back to that kind of job that early.  I was 4 weeks but I sit on my arse all day.  I can/do get up and move about but at my discretion.  I could not have gone back to your job that quick at all.  I was trying to figure out how to wear sweats to a bank job.  Wishing you many steps forward at your timeframe and full healing.  

Yes... similar to my doctor said everything will be back to normal after 6 weeks..... How is that possible? I still feel terrible on the 6 weeks. After my second hospital admission (due to internal bleeding) i rested for 12 weeks..... 

You really need to take things easy and slow..... listen to your body..... get enough water and 8 hours of sleep everyday..... 

Bartending is a tiring job as it is.  Pace yourself and heal.  Hope you start to rebound soon.

mrjoe said:

sometimes we think we're

sometimes we think we're better than we really are.. although I'm newly retired I'm finding this was really some major surgery, and I ain't as young as think I am.. 

/jc

...assuming I live that long; I'm certainly planning to. But definitely can relate to the "I'm not as young as I think I am" sentiment. That's really been hitting me hard since my last oncologist visit. I guess it's all part of the processes: aging and dealing with cancer. But damn, if I could afford to stop working now, at almost 53, I'd do it in a heartbeat.