Hi. I'm new here

Soulshine1960,

Welcome to the H&N forum, sorry that you are here and it sounds like you’ve got your diagnosis (oh boy).

There are members who set-up shop at the hospital or city in which they are getting treatment. Some hospitals have residences for just that sort of thing.  Some make the trip back and forth.  If you have to drive, I would lean toward staying there. If you ride and find your home base a peaceful sanctuary, I might go for the ride. For some, the treatments are quite difficult and the thought of a 4 hour ride or drive may pose an impossible task.  Others can sleep through the ride.  And then there is the once in a blue moon member which handles the treatment side effects like another daily chore (lucky, but few).

I rode 11 miles, no biggy.  I had to take 1 Lorazepam prior to wearing the mask, so I wasn’t at my finest for driving.

To this day 5 ½ years post, I still find it hard to believe what I went through.  I had no hint, no pain, no indicators that I was aware of until a lump on my neck, stage IVa, scc, bot, 1 lymph node, hpv+ (surgeru, Erbitux  & rads).

Good luck,

Matt

We lived about 3 hours from the Cancer Center.  I needed to continue to work to maintain our insurance.  It is wonderful to hear that your center provides accomodations.  We were only offered small discounts at hotels near the center.  It was still expensive.  We decided to use VRBO.  We were able to find a lovely house and negotiate a rate with the owners for the entire treatment time frame.  Because we did not need it on weekends, it allowed them to have a guaranteed weekday renter and they were happy to negotiate.  Also, because of my need to continue to work we had a frank conversation with the treatment team.  They were able adjust his radiation schedule to allow us to be on a Mon/Tues, Thur/Fri schedule.  We came for the last appointment on Mon/Thur and had the first appt on Tues/Fri.  There were a few days when his chemo schedule modified that but mostly for 7 weeks that is what we did.  We really felt refreshed by sleeeping in our own beds, being with our support system and my husband did work during some of his treatment schedule.  I would literally drop my husband off at home, drive straight to work and work either a full or half day depending on the schedule. I think each patient and caregiver have to work out what is best for you when you are facing such a long distance.  There honestly is not an easy answer.  We did get some of our blood work, fluids etc at home to make it all work.  I know you are in shock and there is so much to process.  I did almost all the driving as within a few weeks driving long distances was not a good idea for my husband.  You will figure it out.  There is a lot to think about but please know that you can both make it through even thought it will be hard.  Courage and strength.  

We live 30 minutes from the treatment center. By the second week, my husband was no longer able to drive. When treatment was done, all he wanted to do was come home and rest. Chemotherapy weeks were especially hard. My husband received Cisplatin 3 times over 7 weeks. Starting from the moment we walked in the door and for 3-4 days afterward, he fought nausea and illness. He could barely get out of bed. He ended up getting intravenous hydration. As you don't know how you will be affected, the closer to treatment the better.

Like you, I was just diagnosed and should be starting treatments next week but I'm lucky enough to live fairly close so I can drive myself if need be. Yes, you will have a wirlwind of appts. coming up and still can't believe it's happening but let's hope we can all get thru this and be ready for a happy spring next year disease free.

Good luck to you....