22 and newly diagnosed

My dear young and understandably frightened Abigail ~

It's the wee hours of the morning here on the East Coast but I've just read your story.  Right now I don't know anyone your age that is posting on this forum, but who knows who will be reading your post.  I see that already 12 people have read your post since you put it out just a few hours ago.  All I want to say for now is that there are many women here who have gone through what you are now experiencing and we are here to help in any way we can.  So feel free to write.  We're all about being open and honest here.  I know this seems surreal for the moment. 

Believe me, we can all remember when we were fresh out of high school, then college, then dreams of a life lived happily ever after.    So since I don't fit the "category" of persons you're looking to meet presently, I'll wait for you to ask someone at the other "end of life" about their life's experiences.  I know how important it is to have someone you can more readily relate to. My prayer naturally is that you will have the best of doctors and the best of care, and that you will "come out victorious and cancer free".

This is going to be a "whirlwind post-graduate course" for you in a subject you never intended to take.  You might want to tell those of us who are here presently more about your doctors, your scheduled treatment regimen, what tests you’ve had, what kind of cancer, what stage, etc.  This is all so new to you I don’t expect you to know, but you will have to be a “fast learner”.  Abigail, we’re here for you.

I bet you will have some "real friends" that will stick by your side, even though they can't relate to what you're now experiencing.  Surely, there are some “grown-up” graduates who can face life and understand that they need to learn how to weep with another friend, and be there to listen to your cries, and to cheer you on.  Yes, for now it’s surreal but you mustn’t try to travel this road alone.  So don’t be afraid to share your sorrow with those you think are your friends.  I venture to say some would like to talk with you but don’t know how to begin.  You will probably have to be the one to bring it up.  And although they probably won’t know much about a “malignant ovary”, they can also stand to have a lesson in humility and compassion.  They can be “there for you” and it will enrich their lives to share some of their time with you.

You’re going to need a lot of support, and I’m sure this is all a shock to your family as well.  So if and when you want to, please share more of what’s going on with you at this time.  Many of us have already been where you are now going.  Between all of us there is a lot of knowledge and advice for “newbies”.  We are truly sad to learn that this is one of your biggest tests in “reality” fresh out of college.  I’m certain that all who read your letter will be praying for you to get the best advice from the best doctors, and that the chemo will kill any remaining cancer, and that ultimately you will see the fulfillment of all your dreams.

Love and prayers from someone who was once 22, then a wife, then a mother, then a grandmother, and now a great grandmother age 78

P.S.  Since I don’t know your exact diagnosis, I’m not sure what info would best suit you, but here is a good site that includes lots of info about different types of cancer that we females may be diagnosed with.  A malignant ovarian cyst will fall in a certain category of cancer, and I would not have the slightest idea which category that would come under at this point.  So I won’t overload you to begin with, but here’s a good site for starters, once you know your exact diagnosis.  Don’t be afraid to ask questions.  And one of these sections is entitled exactly that--#14 - QUESTIONS TO ASK. 

1.  http://www.cancer.net/cancer-types/ovarian-fallopian-tube-and-peritoneal-cancer

Ovarian, Fallopian Tube, and Peritoneal Cancer

This is Cancer.Net’s Guide to Ovarian, Fallopian Tube, and Peritoneal Cancer. Use the menu below to choose the Overview/Introduction section to get started. Or, you can choose another section to learn more about a specific question you have. Each guide is reviewed by experts on the Cancer.Net Editorial Board, which is composed of medical, surgical, radiation, gynecologic, and pediatric oncologists, oncology nurses, physician assistants, social workers, and patient advocates.

1. Introduction
2. Statistics
3. Medical Illustrations
4. Risk Factors and Prevention
5. Symptoms and Signs
6. Diagnosis
7. Stages and Grades
8. Treatment Options
9. About Clinical Trials
10. Latest Research
11. Coping with Treatment
12. Follow-Up Care
13. Survivorship
14. Questions to Ask the Doctor
15. Additional Resources

View All Pages

2.  http://www.cancer.net/cancer-types/ovarian-cancer/view-all

____________________________End of references for now_______________________

Abigail,

What a frustrating situation you are in.  It must be hard dealing with this when your friends are leading 'normal' lives.  I think it is great that you are pursuing the fertility angle.  You have no idea what your future holds and it's good to keep your options open for having a child in the future.  Do you know what your diagnosis was, specifically?  There are various different kinds of ovarian cancer and younger women tend to develop a differnt type.  Just curious whether you know the type and stage.  You are dealing with this so early in your life, but you will move past this and life will go on.  As NoTimeForCancer mentioned, it is essential that a gynecologic oncologist perform your surgery.  Good luck

Hi Abigail. I know I'm late to the party here, but I just want to say hi.  I was diagnosed through a cystectomy, same as you, last year at 33. Not nearly as young as you, but still the youngest OC patient in my oncology office. I was diagnosed 3c. I froze tissue, had a total hysterectomy, did weekly Taxol/Carbo, and I am now getting ready to start a clinical trial. Please feel free to message me on this site if you want to talk, complain, ask questions, or just generally make contact.

Take care.