Surgery Follow up

I had my 15 month surgery follow up this morning. My surgeon is checking me very closely as I have now had 3 surgeries and so much of my colon removed. It seemed to go pretty well. He looked at the most recent incision (yup, I am sure you all are familiar with that scope) and said everything looked good. No scar tissue or anything out of the ordinary. He is still convinced that my 2 recurrences are left over (he calls them drop cells) from my original tumor. He was encouraging. He says that if I can make it 3 years post surgery without another recurrence he will feel he may not see me again. So that is 21 months to go. In October I will be 6 years out from the original diagnosis. My 1st recurrence was 26 months after the initial surgery and my 2nd recurrence 28 months after that. I am not really feeling the 3 year thing. But I guess we shall see. I am just blessed that even with the recurrences, surgeries and chemo to still be here almost 6 years after the original diagnosis. So now I guess I will try to put it all away again until mid September when I have all my next tests. Is it silly to be afraid to hope I can make that 3 years? Honestly after my history I am afraid hoping too much might jinx it. 

Blessings

MAlice