Sick Of Being Sick, Tired Of The New Normal

Hi Mwells. 

Although I have a different diagnosis, I was where you are in the treatment last summer.  Try to picture yourself healed and what you'll be doing when that happens. I found practicing some guided imagery exercises every day helped me to stay positive. The University of Michigan Cancer Center has some that you can use for free. And I did have a few little pity parties but try not to go down that deep dark rabbit hole.  We're all with you.

Welcome to this club No one wants to belong to.  So sorry you have to go through this.  This is a good place to come for advice, information, compassion, and to just plain, vent.  I have been on this roller coaster for almost 5 years now. Also stage IV.  I can go for quite awhile and then I have a meltdown.  I cry, my husband holds me and after awhile the tears wash away my worries.  It is hard but hang in there, you are stronger than you think.

Hugs and prayers, Lou Ann

Hello,  my name is sandrine i am french. 

I have a adénocarcinoma endometrial, i am 40.  

You can speack with me on messenger ( sandrine la papaye) 

Kiss 

As the other ladies have said, hang in there, one day at a time.  You are stronger than you think you are. Ask for help as you will find other will give it to you usually where you least expect it.  We all have had those moments in time where we just say screw I do not want to do this today....just do not do it everyday and get pulled in to deep.  There is help for it, talk with your doctors and they can give medicine to help combat those times that get to much.  I am Stage III grade 3 Uterine Carcinosarcoma (MMMT).  August 22, will be 6 years NED.  I had 6 rounds of carbo taxol chemo and no radiation.  Still here.  Still waiting but no worring to much about the other shoe dropping but it is still there in the back of my mind.  Life does get better it is just different, a new normal.  I had about 2 months right after surgery and begining of the chemo treatment that people treated me like a helpless person when I was the strong one of the family.   I had to learn to adjust.  My daughter gave me my shots except for a couple of times that she got to freaked becuse my stomach had no place that was not bruised.  I could not do it because I get freaked out by needles to bad and could not give myself the shot.  Most the time she was doing it I had a pillow over my head so I did not have to see it.  It would have been a bit difficult to try and hide my face and look to see where I was giving myself a shot.  I told her to go get her then BF and get him to do it.  He is diabitic and gives himself shots all the time, no big deal for him.  So covered up everything except my big ole stomach and had him come in and give me by shot.  It was kinda of funny.  Be strong but take time when you need it.  Come back as often as you need to, we are all here to help you. trish

txtrisha55 said:

As the other ladies have said

As the other ladies have said, hang in there, one day at a time.  You are stronger than you think you are. Ask for help as you will find other will give it to you usually where you least expect it.  We all have had those moments in time where we just say screw I do not want to do this today....just do not do it everyday and get pulled in to deep.  There is help for it, talk with your doctors and they can give medicine to help combat those times that get to much.  I am Stage III grade 3 Uterine Carcinosarcoma (MMMT).  August 22, will be 6 years NED.  I had 6 rounds of carbo taxol chemo and no radiation.  Still here.  Still waiting but no worring to much about the other shoe dropping but it is still there in the back of my mind.  Life does get better it is just different, a new normal.  I had about 2 months right after surgery and begining of the chemo treatment that people treated me like a helpless person when I was the strong one of the family.   I had to learn to adjust.  My daughter gave me my shots except for a couple of times that she got to freaked becuse my stomach had no place that was not bruised.  I could not do it because I get freaked out by needles to bad and could not give myself the shot.  Most the time she was doing it I had a pillow over my head so I did not have to see it.  It would have been a bit difficult to try and hide my face and look to see where I was giving myself a shot.  I told her to go get her then BF and get him to do it.  He is diabitic and gives himself shots all the time, no big deal for him.  So covered up everything except my big ole stomach and had him come in and give me by shot.  It was kinda of funny.  Be strong but take time when you need it.  Come back as often as you need to, we are all here to help you. trish

I was where you are last summer.  I would write here and share simmilar feelings as you.  These wonderful ladies would remind me I am normal and they felt those feeling too and it would give me the stength to go on.  MMT stage 2 grade 3

Jairoldi said:

I feel similarly. Trying to

I feel similarly. Trying to stay positive, getting through the chemo, and even making the covert funeral plans. I had a big meltdown 2 weeks ago when my legs hurt so badly I had a hard time getting off the couch. I will have my 3rd carbo/taxol this Friday (every 21 days) and am so not looking forward to it. I have UPSC Stage 3. This week was good, other than tired legs and this is what will make me take myself on Friday for another round. 

Just want you to know we'll be thinking of you on Friday for #3!  You are doing great!!!  I hope you are letting them know about the pain so they can assist you with that.  There is no reason to tough it out when there is help available. 

I don't think there is anything negative in making plans for different outcomes.  It might give you peace of mind and that's huge!  Once you are done with those thoughts put them away and focus on the day at hand.  Living in the day- looking for each blessing - those are the things that helped me and help me to this day!  (((HUGS)))

Mwells and Jairoldi, so glad you found us.... Welcome. We are here for you. I think you can see that just by all of the love being sent your way... I always had what I called a Blue day after each treatment. It normally hit me about the 5th day after chemo. Your finish line will be here before you know it.  And, then the healing will amaze you. I could only walk one lap around the yard with great effort. Now, 1.5 years out and I walk 30 miles each week. Watching my hair come back in was fun. Hated the color but it was still fun to compare month to month pictures.  I hope you continue to push through the front line treatments and come out the other side stronger and with a greater zest for life!

If you haven't already, you might want to read a thread called 'Ladies Going Through chemo'.  There is a lot of information where several of us documented our journey. Some humor there as well.

Please keep in touch and let us know how you are doing.

Love and Hugs,

Cindi

Hi Ladies.  I found out on 7/12/17 that my life has been changed forever. I'm scared, numb, confused, anxious and many othe things right now.  Was diagnosed with uterine carcinosarcoma/MMMT range 3 and am scheduled for surgery on 9/8/17.  Is that too long to wait?  It seems a long time to me.  I'm so afraid that it will spread whle waiting for that date.  Oncologist said that i'll probably need radiation in addtion to chemo.  Anyway, I found this site while searching for a blog about this monster inside me.  Just scared and thought i'd reach out.

Lisa I'm so sorry you had to join our group. To put your mind somewhat at ease I was diagnosed in August 2015 and didn't have my surgery until mid October. After all my treatment which included internal and external radiation as well as 6 rounds of chemo I am clear as of July 2016. There is hope! We will all be here for you and yes ask for the medication to help ease your anxiety. Prayers!

Lisa3320 said:

Just diagnosed with MMMT Range 3 and Scared

Hi Ladies.  I found out on 7/12/17 that my life has been changed forever. I'm scared, numb, confused, anxious and many othe things right now.  Was diagnosed with uterine carcinosarcoma/MMMT range 3 and am scheduled for surgery on 9/8/17.  Is that too long to wait?  It seems a long time to me.  I'm so afraid that it will spread whle waiting for that date.  Oncologist said that i'll probably need radiation in addtion to chemo.  Anyway, I found this site while searching for a blog about this monster inside me.  Just scared and thought i'd reach out.

Hi Lisa, I was diagnosed with uterine MMMT (grade 3, stage 1b) in Sept 2015. It is a scary diagnosis but please know that there is hope! Surgery and treatment (chemo/radiation) is no fun but it is do-able and you can get back to a normal life. I am living proof of that and there are others on this board (who post more often than I do) who can attest to that fact as well. My surgery was scheduled within 2 weeks of my diagnosis but I can't say whether that is standard or not. If you are concerned about the timing, you should definitely call the Gynecological-Oncologist who will be doing your surgery to discuss. Good luck to you! Kim