Ever have one of those days....I know you have!

Apaugh
Apaugh Member Posts: 850 Member
in Breast Cancer #1

I get my treatments every 3 weeks.  The side effects always run their gamit and unfortunatly are on time.  So I go through it and for about 2 days prior to the next one I am feeling pretty good.  This time I did not.  I had a kidney issue, UTI, and the contiuned mystery rash to contend with. 

So today was a treatment day.  Instantly, felt like crap.  Stuffy nose, headache, bone pain.  My friend says to me, "HEY, it will be ok, you only got one more left!"  I know she meant well.  I know she does not have a clue how this feels.  But for a little min. there, I wanted to throat punch her.  I will never tell her what I thought.  She has been a good friend and very helpful to me this past year and half. 

So I came home, turned off my phone and consider myself in for the night.  Tomorrow is another day, where I will choose to think kind thoughts to others.

Hugs to all, I wish you all peace.

Annie

Comments

  • 1surfermom
    1surfermom Member Posts: 396 Member
    #2
    I can relate

    When I was diagnosed with my first battle with BC, my best friend told me that I would get so skinny on chemo, like that was a good thing. By the way it went opposite for me and I gained weight.  With my recent diagnosis the medical assistant who was helping me before my MRI told me that if she were me she would "cut them both off". I was just stunned. Later I thought I should have come back with a thank you for your unsolicited medical advice comment. I know those who have no clue mean well but sometimes.....grrr. Tommorw is another day indeed. Love Surf

  • meschellejensen
    meschellejensen Member Posts: 117
    #3
    I can also relate!

    When I was first diagnosed, I cannot tell you how many people told me that I was lucky because my cancer was caught at stage 1.  They would then go on to tell me that I would survive, and finish with a scary story about somebody who did not survive cancer.  The stories scared me to death, and I always felt uncomfortable if I expressed any emotion other than gratitude.  I found myself trying to help everybody else feel better about my diagnosis.  Let's just be honest here, cancer treatment is awful and some days just suck...

    Annie-I am praying that tomorrow is a better day for you!

  • Teach76
    Teach76 Member Posts: 354 Member
    edited June 2017 #4
    Sending prayers

    Annie,

         Good for you, turning off the world for a while.  I completed 6 rounds of chemo, and like you, I found them predictable.   It was not until my Survivorship Plan meeting that I was told, " You really did well, beyond expectations.  Most people can not make it past their 4th session."  I know it is not much, but congratulations on coming this far!

         I pray your SE are gentle and your rest times are peace-filled!  enjoy a brighter tomorrow!

       Kathy

     

  • HapB
    HapB Member Posts: 527
    edited June 2017 #5
    We can all probably relate

    I just cannot believe how insensitive people have been about this cancer, breast cancer. Maybe all the pink ribbons and fund raisers have been overdone. There is nothing pink bowish about any cancer! I notice e difference in the way I am treated with this cancer and the last. Is is because it is a mostly female cancer?  Not good at all!   

    Annie, I am sorry for all the side effects! I hope that you have a better day tomorrow. I get treatment tomorrow. 

  • meschellejensen
    meschellejensen Member Posts: 117
    #6
    HapB

    Good luck with your next treatment.  I know that you were really unsure about chemo.  I agree with you that there is nothing pink bowish about any cancer treatment!

  • Apaugh
    Apaugh Member Posts: 850 Member
    #7
    thanks

    Thank you ladies.  I knew you would get it.  When I was first diagnoised with BC in Feb. of 2016. I was also told it was stage I and would be nothing.  Whatever!  Liars.   I ended up losing both breast and did the chemo and in NOV of 2016 I started the herceptin.  It has sucked the whole time.  I envy the ones that take it well and bounce back and can still work.  I didnt.  I just continue to feel like crap and continue to be in pain.  But then I have many many health issues so I dont feel bad about it.  I dont feel less. 

    I hated pink with a passion after I was diagnoised.  People send me pink things (bracelet, necklace, hats, shirts)  I dont wear them though.  I might wear pink now and then but no more than I usually did in the past.  I already feel abnormal enough and I feel I look that way too.  I dont want to attract anymore attention to myself than I already do. 

    Today I found out my results of the CT scan of the kidney.  5mm stone has now left the kidney and working it's way down and is almost in the bladder.  Doc gives me 2 wks. to pass it, otherwise they gotta go fish it out.  UGH, let's pray I pass it.  As much as that hurts,  I dont like that fishing.  Been there and done that in the past, they have to put a stint in and oh it hurts like the most horrible UTI you have ever had.  So I continue to drink a gallon of water a day and eat watermelon and now strain my pee hoping for the stone to show up.  The tumor on the kidney that has been there for many many many years has grown a little.  Because my immune system is down, they dont want to touch it.  Will continue to monitor and will discuss with my onc. 

    I keep you all in my prayers and in my heart for better outcomes.

    HUGS,

    Annie

  • Willowtree1822
    Willowtree1822 Member Posts: 13
    #8
    I can understand. I had to

    I can understand. I had to give a little chuckle at the "throat punch" line. :) I've felt that once or twice so far. My first four treatments are every other week and include the white cell booster neulasta. Causing muscle and bone pain. I've heard a few times so far that I only have one to go. (With the neulasta) I just keep my mouth shut, knowing they feel like they are trying to Make me feel better. But really, after my forth treatment, I move to once a week for 12 weeks. How is that better? I just sigh inward. 

    I hope you feel better! Kidney stones on top of all this... ugghhh! I just had to start meds for a UTI myself. One more thing! 

    Hope it finds its way out on its own...that fishing sounds Unpleasant. 

  • 2Floridiansisters
    2Floridiansisters Member Posts: 384 Member
    #9
    Ever have on of those days...

    I have one of those lives. Totally sucks, every day it sucks. 

  • Apaugh
    Apaugh Member Posts: 850 Member
    edited July 2017 #10
    Good news!

    I passed the stone on my own! 

  • meschellejensen
    meschellejensen Member Posts: 117
    #11
    Glad to hear it Annie!

    I am glad to hear it Annie!!  I hope that you have a better week!

    Meschelle

  • Willowtree1822
    Willowtree1822 Member Posts: 13
    #12
    That's great!! 

    That's great!! 

  • disneyfan2008
    disneyfan2008 Member Posts: 6,583 Member
    edited July 2017 #13
    hugs

    hugs

Discussion Boards