dying from cancer

I have always enjoyed reading your posts.

I think we all have spent a good deal of time thinking about death, especially those with higher stages.

I think its weird that i enjoy sharing my thoughts on death with friends and family (ill right it down here sometime) because ive come to have some very positive thoughts about my life and spirituality that ive been granted an opportunity to exaimne that most people dont. I dont want to die and i told my daughter im very hard to kill, but i wouldnt die with a host of regrets or asking god "why me".

However as positive as a place we get in sometimes we have low moments. Wednesday a lady I work with just announced she is going into hospice through her caring bridge account. She is barely 40 and has young children and it devestates me. she was diagnosed a year ahead of me. Consider tomorrow is all my 90 day scans, brain, bones, lung, chest lower abdomen the timing sucked. bu then i feel bad and selfish because the timing was much worse for her.