Dealing but trying to keep Faith!

RebkkaJ
RebkkaJ Member Posts: 2
in Breast Cancer #1

QUick back story- June 2014 my DX was Rt Brst H Grd Ductal Carcinoma 2.1cmx4cm 2 Lymph nodes Positive All I remember beyond that is the ERA-Neg/PRA-Pos/HER2 Equ BRCA both negative. I was only 44 so I chose the ACT chemo/dose dense for 6mos then a full mastectomy w/ resonstruction. I did well on the chemo, I lost my hair after the 2nd treatment (4th week) of Adriamycin but as far as being sick or hurting they were great at making sure the anti-nausea meds were given before as well as afer treatment. I took my chemo on Thur/Fridays so I had the weekend to re-coup before work on Monday. I did well with the cytoxan but not so much with the Taxol. FOr some reason after the Taxol and Nuelasta shot my bones would ache. I would sit in a hot bath for a couple hours and just cringe. Luckily I only had to do that one for 4 weeks. Then 3 weeks after my last chemo treatment I opted for a full mastectomy. I didn't have any complaints with that surgery and the drains were in-convenient but not too bad. ALl in all it was not a pleasant experience but worth it when they said they got it all Jan 2015.

There are a ton of changes you experience that they don't prepare you for! The effects it has on your sex life. How much your financial status is hit. How it changes you mentally & physically. I'm not an angry person but man did I become moody for a few months until I learned how to handle the changes! My poor husband didn't know wether to hug me or run for cover! 

I thought I was in a good place, my hair is growing back, my life is falling back into place, and other than a few minor side effects from the reconstruction surgeries I've been doing well. We planned our first vacation in 3 years for December of this year!

Until Wed. March 1st, I started feeling a little out of breath and it hurt to breathe in so I thought I had a cold & went to the doc. They did a chest X ray, I got a call Friday to go see my Oncologist. I knew that wasn't a good sign! I went to see him Mon. 3/6 he scheduled a Chest CT because of some density questions in the X ray. I got the CT Wed. 3/8, got a call Wed afternoon from my oncologist that they found Innumerable Bilateral Pulmonary Nodules largest being 2.4cm concerning for metastic breast disease, subpectoral and axillary lymph nodes concerning for metastic disease. Now I'm scheduled for a Lung, Lymph Node biopsy Mon. 3/20/17. I'm praying this can be something else.

The wait is almost unbearable now that I know what I could be facing again. This time seems 10x scarier than the first time. I can't sleep, I cry entirely too much randomly. Has anyone else felt this way the second time around? I'm usually a very strong willed person but this is certainly testing my strength! This time they scheduled the Biopsy at the hospital and I have to bring a driver. The first time I didn't. Has anyone had a lung biopsy for possible breast cancer metastisizing?

Thank you for reading, prayers of comfort, strength and guidance to everyone!

 

Comments

  • Mariangel43
    Mariangel43 Member Posts: 79
    #2
    My situation is similar to yours

    I am sorry to hear that you have a recurrence.  Financially and emotionally it takes a good hold on everyone in the family. My health insurance plan increased the monthly premium and the copayments and everything, doctors' appointments, drugs, and tests, is more costly.  So I understand you. For the first time I am starting to getting depressed since April 2016 when I was first diagnosed.  

    At this moment I am waiting for a CT for lungs since I have had a persistent cough since November last year.  My breast surgeon sent me for mammography/US for left breast and a CT for lungs.  (In US appeared a lump in my left breast and an inflammed lymph node too). Tomorrow I will be having my CT because the health plan delayed the authorization for almost a month and I called them and said that if I had cancer in my lungs and they continue delaying my tx I would sue them.  So I got my authorization for CT and they sent it to the wrong institution (revenge). One more week of unneeded waiting and worrying.  I have faith in God and that does not let me get desperate.  I am calm now; besides I have to work.

    Dear, I was a health physicist before doing the job I do now.  When diagnosed, I made an extensive research of the new trends in RT and chemotherapy before subjecting myself to tx. I discovered, as I said before in some cancer sites I am member, and your team should have told you, cancer tx is not a guarantee of 100 percent cure.  Some persons are fortunate to be permanently rid of cancer; however, to the majority of patients it only delays the appereance of new symptoms (what they call disease free survival). But on the long run, the overall survival (our life expectancy) is more or less the same as those who do not have chemo or RT.  My Oncotype score said that I benefited only an 8 % with chemo and only 12 % with RT.  So I skipped them and I don't regret it.  I am at peace with my decisions.

    There are several videos in youtube that talks about the matter.  Look under recurrence after chemo, RT and surgery.  I know you feel deceived and being robbed of your health.  I will pray and be in contact with you if you let me. This time your treatment be chemo.  Maybe they change the chemo drugs for more effective ones.  I wish you the best.

     

  • Kats2
    Kats2 Member Posts: 126
    edited March 2017 #3
    Thinking of you..

    Hi RebkkaJ,

    I am keeping you in my prayers that if need be a successful treatment plan will be found for you. I know of 2 women with lung mets who are on Abraxane chemo infusion and are seeing positive results. More and more new drugs are coming out all the time to treat BC. Keep the faith, though that's easier said than done. What is Her2 Eq? Is that positive or negative? That would have a bearing as to which drugs would be effective for you to be on. It sounds like you have good medical doctors who are on top of your situation. That's a positive.

    You may still want to get a 2nd opinion from an outside medical facility. I did, twice. My insurance and Oncologist both approved and encouraged it. I'll be seeing the consultant doctor on the 20th to find out how my CT and Bone scans came out, also my tumor marker blood test. She'll be contacting my regular Oncologist with her findings and recommendations. It never hurts to get another opinion, especially if that doctor or facility deals strictly with breast cancer which this one does.  ( My regular Oncologist deals with many different kinds of cancer and not just BC) As a matter of fact, Oncologists welcome opinions of other Oncologists so that they can see whether they're up to the latest research and knowledge of treatment plans and clinical trials. At least that's what happens in my area which is Massachusetts. 

    You've been through a lot. My hope is that you'll stay strong and do what needs to be done to get through this uncertain time. There's  always hope and if you believe in a higher power, "With God all things are possible." That leaves nothing out. I'm Stage 4 myself, and live with the unknown as far as my future goes. I'm praying to St. Luke, the Patron Saint of Physicians, for strength. It helps. 

    Keep us posted as to your progress. And try as much as possible to stay positive. I'll be thinking of you on the 20th. Good luck and prayers for you on that day!

                                                           Kats2

     

  • RebkkaJ
    RebkkaJ Member Posts: 2
    #4
    Biopsy Yesterda

    Thank you both for your positive comments, thoughts and prayers. It helps knowing there are others out there that understand what your going through. My husband has been a rock but I know he's hurting inside too. he keeps a positive smile on for me and tries to keep things light and positive.

    I had my biopsy done yesterday morning at 8am. Doctor Hailey was good and had a great bedside manner. I should have my results by Wed 3/22 no later than THurs 3/23. He did not want to go far into the lung so he got the smaller nodules and 2 lymph nodes on the right side. I'm staying positive and praying. I don't know why or how but I'm actually at peace with whatever diagnosis I receive. I think it's honestly because I've had a couple of weeks to cry, scream and pray.

    My Oncologist, Dr. Robert Reynolds does not specialize in breast cancer he's actually all forms with a specialty in Hematology. I chose him because he did so well with my mother and father in law. I trust him but have an appointment for a second opinion at Baptist. My insurance isn't giving me to hard of a time only with the PET scans. they sure don't like to pay those!

    Thank you both for the suggestions. I will keep you both in my prayers and thoughts! Please keep me updated with your status and results. I know how hard this is. I'd like to keep in touch to share, help in our journeys in anyway I can.

    This is kind of short, my arm and back are pretty sore today. :( I will update when I hear more news! Have a Blessed week ladies, prayers of peace, healing, and comfort to you!!!

     

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