Scared wife

The C-word diagnosis is enough to send anyone reeling, patient, family, and/or friends. I was writing the rough draft of my obituary right after I got the news, but that was way more than just a tad premature.  I think some of my friends and family were already picking out what they were going to bring to the potluck after my service: Also premature.  I'd say "Try to relax," but that's easier said than done. So I guess I'll encourage you to do your best not to get worked up any more than you already have -- and slowly work on the "relax" part. 

That his cancer had the good manners to not spread is a real plus.  The first line of response with RCC (Renal Cell Carcinoma) is surgery.  If it hasn't spread, it may never spread, and this will be all that's needed. Patients who've had an RCC tumor removed generally get monitored closely with CT and/or ultrasound scans post-surgery. That way, should any cells go on walkabout, the team will catch it quickly and respond while it's still small. RCC is not the death sentence it once was, not even close to it. 

I'm sorry the doctor emphasized how dangerous the surgery is (He loses points for delivery, I'm afraid). Of course it's tricky surgery, but they're trained and experienced to deal with that sort of thing.  That's why they're surgeons and that's why surgeons have specialties. Write down any questions you and he may have, and be sure to take them -- and a pad and pencil -- to appointments.  If you think of something after an appointment, you can always call with your question. Some health care teams even have an on-line portal system so patients can communicate. 

Do you have some good supportive people to help you? When you go to the hospital for his surgery, it's really helpful to have someone with you while you wait. The best kind of folks are the ones that aren't in to drama and can be good listeners and supporters. Remember to eat healthy foods (you might want to pack some snacks for the hospital), drink water, exercise, do what you normally do to de-stress. That's good when you're NOT at the hospital, too.  The kidney cancer group here has got your back (his too), at least on a cyber level. 

Keep us posted --

Jerzy

Don't be scared, have to stay strong.  I know how this feels.. my dad has stage 4 colon cancer and we are trying out best to be brave, sometimes we have no other choice but to be strong.  I pray that you and your family will be watched over in this time of need.  Just be there for your husband, he needs all the support he can.  My siblings and I took it rough finding out about our dad but I'm sure your kids will be hurt too but they need to continue with schooling and just know that they are making their dad proud no matter what.  Remind your husband and let your kids remind their dad how much he means to you guys and how much you guys love him, that'll ease the pain a bit.