Dating

lp1964 said:

Dear Friend,

I'm sorry for your diagnosis. I am a 51 year old male post rectal cancer with the colostomy. Happy to report that there is a great life after cancer. When we get the bad new our mind has a hard time processing it and has some weird ideas. Get through the treatment and hopefully everything will be fine. When you hav the surgery I suggest you have an extra procedure done when they take one of your abdominal muscles and fill up the space with it where the rectum used to be. This will give you better healing, looks and prevent your intestines sinking in the pelvis. 

Living with colostomy is not easy but doable. I was married before single now and dating. Can be done.

Keep coming back here or email me with questions.

All the best,

Laz

Thank you, Laz, for getting back with me.  Your input has given me hope because you have been where I am right now.  This so far has been nightmare as far as the doctors not deciding on the best treatment.  Hopefully this Friday they wll come up with one and start it.  I feel like my life is on hold, not that it was so exciting.  I have never known anyone with a colostomy before so I really don't know what one is or the effects it has on a person's life.  It sounds like you are doing well.  I more than likely will be emailing you because you have gave me hope with a positive attitude.  Thank you so much.

eihtak said:

Lisa202

Hi,

I am so sorry you have found this new challenge in your life.....but in answer to your question about life after cancer, yes!!! While we are all different and so each react and recover in our own way, for me, I have been known to say that my life is better now than it was pre-cancer and the only way I would have got to this point is by the path I took!!

I was dx and treated for anal cancer Stage 3b in 2011. I too had chemo/radiation and did end up with a colostomy. While the ostomy was intended to be temporary, severe radiation damage to that area made it permanent. There are several different ways to perform this surgery and some are less radical then others. I have what is called a loop ostomy and easier to reverse in the future if an option. This means I still have my anus and rectum, though they are "out of commission"....also quicker healing after surgery. There is a definate adjustment period to this lifestyle, yet at least for me, has not limited ANY of my previous activities once I became better informed. There are both online and in person support groups that I strongly recommend if you find this is a surgery you need as sharing tips with others in the same boat was most beneficial to me.

A year after my anal cancer, I was dx with breast cancer (unrelated) and required a mastectomy....I had a double and went through yet another adjustment!

Then, just last year, my initial cancer revisted with mets to my lung! It was contained in one lobe so had a thoracotomy to remove that section of my lung followed by aggressive chemo.

While each of these situations proved difficult in the moment and during treatment.....I recovered each time with a new found outlook and strength. In between I chased (and continue to) grandkids around baseball fields and hockey rinks, attended beautiful weddings and fun events to celebrate family and friends, I went back to college at 55 years old and will graduate this December, I do volunteer work in my community,and have taken several fun vacations as I have made "enjoying my time in life" a top priority. I am physically active, swim, do light yoga, and while I am married and do not date, would feel comfortable doing so if was in that position. My husband himself is ill with issues related to a blood cancer and this has more of an effect on our intimate relations than my having an ostomy.

You will find a comfort zone, and be able to handle your life ahead.....if nothing else than because you have no choice but to "handle it".....and we are here to help!

For now, take first things first, and set yourself up to be strong during the chemo and radiation. It can seem brutal at times, but is short in comparrison to many other treatments and recovery does follow. Please stay in touch with any questions and feel free to pm me if you'd like.

katheryn

Thank you, Katheryn.  Your message was very helpful.  I think it is the unknown that scares me.  I live alone and am facing this alone.  I have friends but they have their own lives to live.  I did not know where to turn for any support.  All of you have been really helpful by sharing your stories and giving me hope.  They really don't think the treatments will shrink the mass so I more than  likely will require drastic measures due to where the cancer is.  I guess I just you can say I had no where to turn to ask these questions and concerns.  Thank you from the bottom of my heart for responding to me and sharing your story.  You are a true inspiration to someone like me facing the unknown.

nicotianna said:

Thank you

Lisa202- You are welcome!

I am on another blog.  One of the bloggers reported about a melanoma anal ca survivor she knows through a ca survivor group.  This melanoma survivor had metastasis but reports being cured with Keytruda.  If you wish to contact this blogger contact me through CSN email.  I merely read the blogger's blog but you may want to pursue for more info.  I know your ca is very rare. 

Nic

Thank you for contacting me, Nic!  I would love to contact the blogger because the doctor's I am seeing have never seen a case of it. They are working researching it.  I just had a port put in and will start radiation soon.  They through their research found two chemo drugs that they are going to try but as of yet I do not know the names of them.  I ended up having to be taken by ambulance from the local Walmart last Monday night due to bleeding in the bathroom and severe pain.  It was really embarrassing.  The ER doctor had no idea how to even treat me.  It was a disaster to say the least.  I really appreciate you getting back with me.  Hopefully this information can help me.