My brother came to spend Christmas

Hondo
Hondo Member Posts: 6,636 Member
in Head and Neck Cancer #1

I went and picked up my brother who lives somewhere in New Orleans so he could spend Christmas with me. It was nice having him around but man I could not wait to bring him back to New Orleans.

He is an alcoholic and the one thing I hate is seeing someone with no health problems distorting their body. I am not sure why people who seem to do more to hurt themselves and destroy there one only body are always healthy looking. All my life I took very good care of my body and ate only healthy foods and I am the one with cancer. I am also the only one in my family who was able to fight it three times and win, for that all I can say is thank you my Lord.

 

Tim    

Comments

  • wmc
    wmc Member Posts: 1,804
    #2
    Some day we will learn.....

    Someday we will understand the why. But now is the time to just be greatfull as you are.

    My Brother who is 10 years older and myself were never close growing up, all the way up to about 20 years ago. These last four years we got to get much closer, then I got cancer. He hoped but never thought I would survive it. I just told him, I'll be fine once they remove the tumor, and I know I am going to lose my larynx and never talk the same, but i'm ok with it. He showed me in his way how much he did care, and we got much closer. It took me years to really get to know my brother, and not almost hate him. I was the youngest and too young to see how he was being treated different than I was. Our parents and Grandparents all treated me different, which made it all that much worse. He was not what you would call nice to me, and i'll leave it at that. Because what does matter is I understand the why. When I got through the surgery and started to talk with my "new" voice and it took me two months to relearn how to whistle is when he told me for the first time in my life, he was proud of me. I was 63 when he said he was proud. He had both knees replaced, and said that I gave him the streight to get through it. Now my sister is another story. Just the opposite, we were close, at least I thought so. We don't talk any more and it is for the best.

    You ask yourself why. Why have you beat this so many times. Why this happened to you, as you were always healthy and took care of your body. Someday you will know the why. For now, it just might be you have touched many lives, and helped so many get through their fight with the beast. I know it was and is, my faith that got me through this. 

    Someday we both will understand the why:   So for now, thank you.

    Bill

  • MrsBD
    MrsBD Member Posts: 617 Member
    #3
    They say God works in

    They say God works in mysterious ways. My three siblings all smoked and drank, but guess who got throat cancer? I focus on whole grains, eat very little red meat, and dutifully down my veggies, but my cholesterol is higher than my husband's, and he is a dietician's nightmare. Comparing ourselves to others just isn't a very positive activity. We may never figure out why we got cancer, but God promises to work everything to the good for those who love him. Keep trusting, Tim.

    Beth

  • Barbaraek
    Barbaraek Member Posts: 626
    #4
    MrsBD said:

    They say God works in

    They say God works in mysterious ways. My three siblings all smoked and drank, but guess who got throat cancer? I focus on whole grains, eat very little red meat, and dutifully down my veggies, but my cholesterol is higher than my husband's, and he is a dietician's nightmare. Comparing ourselves to others just isn't a very positive activity. We may never figure out why we got cancer, but God promises to work everything to the good for those who love him. Keep trusting, Tim.

    Beth

    Beth I believe this also...

    I think one of the best things we can do as humans is to look at a bad situation and find the silver lining...and if we don't see it at first we learn to dig even deeper and find it. Life is too too short to waste time on the negatives.

     

    barbara

  • Duggie88
    Duggie88 Member Posts: 760 Member
    #5
    Tim

    You know the old saying,"You can pick your frrends but you can't pick your family". You can lecture them, throw them hints, send them articles but unless they really want to do domething about it you end up becoming a pain in their eyes or at least when your trying to get your point across. My wife smoked through my treatment and never quit until 7 months ago. I use to go out on our front porch while she was out there puffing away and one day I asked her to give me one. She said no look what it did to you, I replied so what, what's it doing to you? I asked if she honestly thought she was untouchable.

    When it comes to situations such as this I truly believe something has to light up within themselves and they realize they have to change something. All we can do is help them find that light switch.

    Enjoy the day

          Jeff 

  • Hondo
    Hondo Member Posts: 6,636 Member
    #6
    Thanks

    myIt is very hard for me to see him doing what he is doing, I had to burry my half-sister because she drank herself into the grave. After many years of abuse her liver gave out and she died, and watching him do the same thing is very very hard for me. But thank you all for your concern and kind words, like you said Bill someday we will all understand.

     

    God bless

    Tim

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