15 Months NED but still smoking..

granmudder
granmudder Member Posts: 41 Member
in Head and Neck Cancer #1

Just Venting because im worried and no matter what I say to my hubby it doen't matter i watch him everyday first thing get up and out for a smoke.. smoking probably 20 -25 cigarettes a day.. high stress  for certain which I guess is why ...working hard we have our own business.. He was doing pretty good but now on downswing .. doesnt really want to eat much eats only when necessary and at that not enough still hasnt put on much weight. Had started bike riding and resistance training a little this summer. Drinking at least a few beers daily and wine with dinner..lifestyle has stayed pretty much the same as pre treatment only difference now is He doesnt really like sweets anymore or breads or even pasta..

Just worried He is going to bring on another cancer Dr told him He wouldnt likely get the one He had back as it was HPV16 but He could definitly bring on cancer caused by smoking...

doesnt stop him.

makes me sad.

 

I know there are no answers.

 

Just needed to say it..

 

Comments

  • wmc
    wmc Member Posts: 1,804
    #2
    Venting is good. I understand more than you know.

    I still smoked with emphysema and knew I should stop but didn't. When I was told I had cancer I stopped cold turkey. I had tried all the outher aide, but if you are not really ready to stop they won't work. I decided to stop the night before I saw the tumor board. I was not HPV+ so my odds were 90% it wiuld come back. I stopped 8/28/2013 @ 8:00pm. A date I will never forget. I have never had withralls or any craving to smoke, i'm lucky. 

    Now two years later I still can't get my son to stop. I said you saw me fight cancer and you do know I will die from emphysema as there is no cure or getting better, only worse. I estimate I will be very lucky if I ever see 73 and i'm turning 65 very soon, as I am following my fathers path to the letter. He did at least stop smoking Camel Crush, which is what caused me to go from stage 2 to stage 3 in nine months. My doctor asked what the hell I did to my lungs. But he still smokes and is young enought that it is easier and doesn't have emphysema so his lungs can rebuild. Mine look like a hand grenade went off in them. I do wish you luck, but until he is really ready it won't happen. I now have no larynx and breath out my neck. I did beat cancer and I don't smoke, but I can't go above 3000 feet without oxygen or walk on the sand at the beach of fly, but I have a second chance on life. I know this is very stressfull on you, and you can't do a thing about it. Sorry.............

    Bill

  • phrannie51
    phrannie51 Member Posts: 4,716
    #3
    It is very hard to watch

    a loved one continue to do things that aren't just unhealthy in general, but in this case, smoking....is specifically unhealthy.  Just because his was HPV+ doesn't mean that smoking didn't contribute to getting throat cancer.

    It's good to vent, and venting here is a safe place to do it.  Acceptance that we cannot change other people.....ever....helps, too....I can only tell you what I do when I run into stuff like this.  After I'm done being pissed, scared, and powerless.....of course.  I just go back to loving them, and put that other stuff in a box.  Feeling constant turmoil is tiring and unhealthy....especially when it's something futile. 

    p

  • jackflash22
    jackflash22 Member Posts: 524 Member
    #4
    wmc said:

    Venting is good. I understand more than you know.

    I still smoked with emphysema and knew I should stop but didn't. When I was told I had cancer I stopped cold turkey. I had tried all the outher aide, but if you are not really ready to stop they won't work. I decided to stop the night before I saw the tumor board. I was not HPV+ so my odds were 90% it wiuld come back. I stopped 8/28/2013 @ 8:00pm. A date I will never forget. I have never had withralls or any craving to smoke, i'm lucky. 

    Now two years later I still can't get my son to stop. I said you saw me fight cancer and you do know I will die from emphysema as there is no cure or getting better, only worse. I estimate I will be very lucky if I ever see 73 and i'm turning 65 very soon, as I am following my fathers path to the letter. He did at least stop smoking Camel Crush, which is what caused me to go from stage 2 to stage 3 in nine months. My doctor asked what the hell I did to my lungs. But he still smokes and is young enought that it is easier and doesn't have emphysema so his lungs can rebuild. Mine look like a hand grenade went off in them. I do wish you luck, but until he is really ready it won't happen. I now have no larynx and breath out my neck. I did beat cancer and I don't smoke, but I can't go above 3000 feet without oxygen or walk on the sand at the beach of fly, but I have a second chance on life. I know this is very stressfull on you, and you can't do a thing about it. Sorry.............

    Bill

    Ciggies

    isn't it strange that folk like to puff away on a leaf rolled in a bit of paper packed through with poison. Stranger still they know it may kill them but don't care. I bet if you offered them a sniff of arsenic they wouldn't dream of doing it. My partner smoked all his life and coughed all he time he didn't even know when he coughed. He paid for it I'm sad to say in March this year. I watched him get worse and worse with trying to breathe he couldn't walk down the path without puffing an wheezing but denied it when I said anything. I was with him when he died and it was terrible seeing him fighting for breathe. He had nodules in his lungs but the death certificate read fibrosis of the lungs. That's when he lung goes solid and won't expand until it too late to do anything about. I tried and tried to get him to stop smoking, he did three months before he died but it was too late. Please anyone who smokes give it up or never start in the first place. Sorry to be so morbid but I have a thing about healthy people risking their lives. 

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