lorraine

bob13440
bob13440 Member Posts: 66
in Uterine/Endometrial Cancer #1

It's been a while since I've been on here. Lorraine has stage 4 ovarian, but I posted on the uterine board because...well, because I was confused. 

Lorraine just finished her 3rd surgery on Monday. This was a hernia/bowel surgery. Overall things are okay. Her marker # which before her initial surgery was 8,000, last check was 113, still high but going in the right direction. These last seven months have been so emotional. Sometimes it's almost like we forget she has cancer, but then there's days where I can't get it out of my mind. I try really hard to be strong, but there are days when I can't and I breakdown, it's really taking it's toll on me. 

After she recovers from this surgery, she has 6 more weeks of chemo, then sometime after that a double mastectomy will take place. I'm so grateful that her doctors are doing what they have to to help her, but it's crushing me to see her go through so much, I feel helpless. The optimism is still here, but sadness and anger also creep in, a lot. This is so difficult to go through, sometimes I feel guilty for being healthy, I wish I could take it from her and put it in me.

I hope all of your battles are going as well as possible. This is the first place I turned to when we received the awful news. Thanks for all the messages and concern.

Comments

  • ConnieSW
    ConnieSW Member Posts: 1,688 Member
    #2
    Thank you

    For letting us know how things have been going, Bob.  As you have seen, we have been thinking of you and Lorraine and wondering.  This isn't an easy path for sure but having each other to lean on makes the journey easier.

  • AWK
    AWK Member Posts: 364 Member
    #3
    Keeping you both in my prayers

    I wish there was more we could do for you both.  I read your posts and they actually give me insight as to my husband's journey with me.  He tries to keep his emotions contained and take care of things.  I love our "normal" days and am happy to get that break from cancer mentally.  I encourage him to do the same as much as he can.  One thing I have noticed with both of us is that we are withdrawing from people who only want to talk about the cancer and don't let us have those normal conversations about everything going on including the cancer, kids etc.  

    One thing I think he is going through is not only fear and anger but actually grief.  I enourage him to air it all out and remind him that he is sharing in this and lifting so much off of my shoulders.  I am sure you are doing the same for her.  And we have gotten close on such a different level - I can't explain it but we have.  My biggest worry and fear in all of this is him.  He is wonderful and the thought of his pain in all of this is really hard but also why I fight so hard.  Your wife is a lucky lady.  You can always come to us and vent, ask questions.  

     Sending hugs.  Anne

  • NoTimeForCancer
    NoTimeForCancer Member Posts: 3,488 Member
    #4
    Bob, thank you for letting us

    Bob, thank you for letting us know how you and Lorraine are doing. As Winston Churchill said, "Never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever give up".

  • Lou Ann M
    Lou Ann M Member Posts: 996 Member
    #5
    AWK said:

    Keeping you both in my prayers

    I wish there was more we could do for you both.  I read your posts and they actually give me insight as to my husband's journey with me.  He tries to keep his emotions contained and take care of things.  I love our "normal" days and am happy to get that break from cancer mentally.  I encourage him to do the same as much as he can.  One thing I have noticed with both of us is that we are withdrawing from people who only want to talk about the cancer and don't let us have those normal conversations about everything going on including the cancer, kids etc.  

    One thing I think he is going through is not only fear and anger but actually grief.  I enourage him to air it all out and remind him that he is sharing in this and lifting so much off of my shoulders.  I am sure you are doing the same for her.  And we have gotten close on such a different level - I can't explain it but we have.  My biggest worry and fear in all of this is him.  He is wonderful and the thought of his pain in all of this is really hard but also why I fight so hard.  Your wife is a lucky lady.  You can always come to us and vent, ask questions.  

     Sending hugs.  Anne

    Ditto for me

    Anne,  your thoughts and words echo my thoughts in every way.  Hugs and prayers, Lou Ann

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