Chemo and blood clots

Hi everyone! Sorry I was gone for so long. I've been in the hospatal from Dec 9 until the other day. If anyone remembers, I'd been asking about blood clots and chemo because I'd had 3 superficial blood clots and was worried. I completed 8 of the 12 suggested rounds of chemo and was miserable with fatigue and neuropathy. Every time I went in with a new blood clot they just said to take adult aspirin every day, which I did.

On Dec 8th I was fine and the morning of Dec 9 I felt like I was going to faint and asked my husband to get me to the hospital. He called 911 and by the time they got there I was in cardiac arrest and no longer breathing. A DVT (deep vein thrombosis) blood clot had gone to my lung. The EMTs revived me but I had 7 more cardiac arrests during the ambulance ride to the city for a total of 8 times they revived me. I was told this when the EMTs came to visit me recently. I then arrested again in emergency. One of the doctors spoke to me husband and daughter about not reviving me again. He figured with the cancer ir might be kinder and he was quite positive I'd have brain damage. Since all of this theyve tested me s few times and can find no trace of cancer.

During the next few days I had a stroke, my kidneys failed due to all the medications I was on and I had to have dialysis. I swelled up with fluid so badly my friends were scared my skin was going to rip open. I was on 19 IV lines. I had what they call a catastrophic brain bleed between the hemispheres. Apparently I was still sometimes somewhat awake and trying to pull IVs and tubes in my throat out so they sedated me for a week. I don't remember any of this. After a week they stopped sedating me but I'd gone into a coma so I still didn't wake up.

Once I woke up from the coma I was totally unable to move due to what they call critical illness polyneuromyopathy. Basically, the brain tries to save itself and tells the rest of the body's nerves and muscles they're no longer needed. I've had to totally relearn how to walk or do anything again. At the beginning I had to ask my husband to scratch my nose. I couldn't even turn my head to the side. It was scary and horrible. I could feel everything, however. I was always hurting due to how I was positioned in bed but could do nothing to help myself. At first I couldn't talk, either.

My arms and hands came back first and I'm still working on my legs. Of course, I'm now deconditioned as well. I can walk very short distances but it's not pretty (think of how the apes walked in Planet of the Apes) and it's exhausting. I use a wheelchair much of the time when I'm not in bed.

The main doctor in ICU told me I shouldn't be alive and he figured my odds had been about one in a thousand of surviving at all let alone with my brain intact. Mentally, I'm exactly the same as I was before. Two other doctors in ICU very seriously asked me if I realized that I'd received a miracle. They have no explanation for my survival and recovery other than I was otherwise healthy enough and tough enough. One of my rehab therapists told me one day that I had grit. True grit. I don't know why I survived but I am so grateful that I received such a gift and I credit God with that. Now I feel like I want to do something with me life but I don't know what it will be.

My most important thing in life is to help animals and I still feel the same. My horse was brought to the hospital in January and there's a magazine article about it. The writer told me they've received lots of emails telling them I've given them hope or made a crappy day brighter. But I feel like I have to do something more with this gift of life I've been given.

Another thing I'm so grateful for is the support I've received from people that I thought were just acquaintances. I can't believe some of the people who've come to visit me. The farrier we use for our horse's feet, a horse show judge, customers from when I owned my doggie daycare. Many people have prayed for me. And supported my husband and daughter. My daughter is 26 and she and I are more like friends than mother and daughter. She collapsed whenshe first saw me in emergency but she's been strong ever since. One of my close friends came and complately cleaned the bedroom, she washed walls and evrything.

Anyway, more than enough about me. I want this to be a warning about blood clots and chemo. Two days after I collapsed I had an appointment with my oncologist and I was going to tell her I wasn't completing my chemo. I had a bad feeling from the beginning, particularly when I had the three blood clots. I'm not saying don't do mop up chemo after your surgery, my situation was rare. I'm just saying that if you start getting some adverse reactions that concern you, don't let them brush you off like I did.