3 days on 3 days off - can't think of a better title!

Wait. MY dog (pictured) got high grade lymphoma when I was going through treatment too. Well, he was diagnosed a  month after I finished treatment. He put up a good fight though. He was an 11year old lab. Beautiful hunk of dog. I miss him terribly. of all the dogs in my life he's the one that will be waiting for me.

But back to your topic, I am 14 months out and can find no rhyme or reason to the pattern. Now I seem to go 3 or 4 weeks with no pain or bleeding then a couple of weeks on. My rectal surgeon does feel it's scraping on the tender tissues. He has me on fiber supplement (I didn't think I needed one because I already have high fiber diet, but whatever the boss says). Then short term, two months, high dose of vitamin A and , uh, lubricate the chute. We will see what we will see.

i think some people on the forum drink wine but honestly I haven't liked it since chemo so I don't know about that.

mp327 said:

Adam

I hate to say it, but even at almost 6 1/2 years out of treatment, I experience cranky bowels sometimes.  I have an occasional painful BM if I get constipated and the stool is hard to pass.  For some of us, unfortunately, this is something we may have to deal with the rest of our lives.  It's one of the cruel realities of this disease.

I'm sorry to hear about your dog.  How I wish we could have our precious pets forever. 

I'm glad your mom is getting exercise--it's great for the body, mind and soul!

Martha

4 1/2 later I have incredible pain every time i have a BM.  Sometimes I vomit!   I bled for three years.  No blood now for over a year.  Somemetimes i scream out lound from the shooting pains in my groin and inside me. I hope your moms reovery from chemo and radiation goes as smooth as it can. I never expected to go back to normal as my doctor explained that would be impossible.

On the other hand if I give myself plenty of time for bowel movements, keep my diet light and healthy, and get plent of exercise I feel ok sort of.4/12 years later I am still feeling improvements in my energy level.

My advice is get plenty of rest, drink tons of water, keep a food diary and roll with it.

qv62 said:

Adam26

Happy Birthday Adam, glad to hear mom is out and about. I am 8 months out and just starting to exercise so kudos to her for sure. As for the pain and urgency I have occasional pain and unfortunately urgency every day, several times a day. I hope she continues to feel better.

My doctor went over all the possibilities with me.  I signed a sheet or two listing all the possible side effects.  The painful B.M.  were not even on the list. Things like malabsorption, pernicious anemia, chronic pain, stenosis, neuropathy and even cancer plus many others were on the list.    I don't know why I have the pain.  I have perfect poop and lots of it.  But it is difficult to get it out.    I have run the gamut from perfect poop for a year to constipation for 1 1/2 b years back to perfect poop again.  I pray I can keep it that way.  This is a twisted road .  The urgency, I would  never hold it in.  I think that is how I ended up with the chronic constipation.  Everything  is a delicate balance.  I eat and drink at home.  I do go out to eat with my husband.  But I never go alone now.  Why risk it!  It's 4 1/2 years now and I have accepted all of it.   I have had three accidents out, big ones!  Ihave horrible gas for months at a time.  I have no control over it.  Hysterical!    It was worth it!  I love my life!  The urgency for your Mom may or may not go away, the same with the pain.  It never seems to let up for me problem after problem.  Poop is the least of it!

i play with my dog , walk, work and even surf.  I wouldn't be doing that if I had not had the TREATMENT!

im very impressed that your Mom is back at the gym.  I was 49 at diagnosis. It was at least a year before I had the extra energy for anything.  Maybe she  will be one of the lucky ones.  Is she using her dialator!  I think we all get the vaginal stenosis.

I am sorry to hear about your dog.  I have lost my soulmate , my dog soulmate  a few years ago.  I think of him everyday.

Happy Birthday Adam!

Adam26 said:

Hey guys!
Firstly, to Eihtak,

Hey guys!

Firstly, to Eihtak,  I hope your chemo goes well and you can get back to your normal life again soon. I wish you all the best with your recovery and also, thank you for the link, that was exactly it!

To everyone, thank you so much for your replies. They made total sense to me. Luckily, this "friend" hasn't been on the scene since then. My mum has had more positive support around her which is fantastic. People need to be more considerate with what they say!

My mum's doing good. Although she gets paranoid about the odd pain somewhere and suddenly she thinks she had another form of cancer. She spoke to her doctor about anxiety etc and had a check up of her weight which was normal and various other questions were answered. She's much better now and it was her birthday yesterday, she actually was feeling subdued because she didn't like all the attention - it reminded her of when she was first diagnosed. I can't believe it's been over 5 months now since she finished her treatment! It seems to be mainly the mental aspect of recovery that is worse for her, but she's gradually getting better both mentally and physically.

One thing I obols like to know. We were hoping to be moving abroad at the end of the year, mentioned it before, to Barcelona or just outside it. At the moment though, she can't really get on a plane because of her urgencies. She's worried about a lack of public toilets in Barcelona and inter-European planes are tiny and normally the toilets aren't that great. If she's 5 months out now and doing better, based on your experiences, do you think she'd be fit to travel by October which would be a year after treatment? She's a very restless lady and hates that she has to wait around.

Martha I know you mentioned about considering staying off the site at some point. It must be very hard to decide because on one hand, perhaps you want to distance yourself from cancer after many years NED and on the other hand, you do such a lot of good work for other people, such as myself and my mum. But you have to do what is best for yourself. Thank you for all of the help you've given me and thank you to everybody else too. This website was really useful for me during the darker days and still is useful now. My mum wants to write a message so I'll start up another thread.

All the best,

Adam

Thank you so much for your kind words to me--that means a great deal to me and I'm glad that something I've said along the way has helped you or your mom or others on this site.  As is obvious, I'm still here, checking in daily and trying to respond whenever I feel I have something to offer.  I really appreciate your support and kind comments to me and I will do my best to not fade completely into the sunset!

As for your mom's concerns about traveling, I can understand.  I made a trip to California about 2 1/2 years ago and was so worried that I'd get on that plane and not be able to get to the bathroom in time.  However, I tweaked my diet somewhat a couple of days before the trip, cutting back on high-fiber foods, such as fruits and veggies.  Basically, I followed a low-residue diet.  If you look that up on the internet, you'll find that it is good for resting the bowels, which means fewer or no BM's.  Of course, it is meant to be used only for short-term, but perhaps if your mom could eat differently a day or two ahead of the trip, she could avoid any incontinence or urgency issues.  It's just a suggestion.  Hopefully by October, however, her bowels will be behaving even better, as things do get better with time. 

Please tell your mom that Martha from across the pond wishes her a belated happy birthday.  I never celebrated birthdays quite like I do now since having had cancer.  I have come to realize what special days they are and a celebration is definitely in order!  I wish her many, many more happy birthdays!

God bless you and your mom as you both continue to move forward in your lives.  I hope you'll both enjoy living in Barcelona and I wish you both the very best!

Martha

mp327 said:

Hi Adam

Thank you so much for your kind words to me--that means a great deal to me and I'm glad that something I've said along the way has helped you or your mom or others on this site.  As is obvious, I'm still here, checking in daily and trying to respond whenever I feel I have something to offer.  I really appreciate your support and kind comments to me and I will do my best to not fade completely into the sunset!

As for your mom's concerns about traveling, I can understand.  I made a trip to California about 2 1/2 years ago and was so worried that I'd get on that plane and not be able to get to the bathroom in time.  However, I tweaked my diet somewhat a couple of days before the trip, cutting back on high-fiber foods, such as fruits and veggies.  Basically, I followed a low-residue diet.  If you look that up on the internet, you'll find that it is good for resting the bowels, which means fewer or no BM's.  Of course, it is meant to be used only for short-term, but perhaps if your mom could eat differently a day or two ahead of the trip, she could avoid any incontinence or urgency issues.  It's just a suggestion.  Hopefully by October, however, her bowels will be behaving even better, as things do get better with time. 

Please tell your mom that Martha from across the pond wishes her a belated happy birthday.  I never celebrated birthdays quite like I do now since having had cancer.  I have come to realize what special days they are and a celebration is definitely in order!  I wish her many, many more happy birthdays!

God bless you and your mom as you both continue to move forward in your lives.  I hope you'll both enjoy living in Barcelona and I wish you both the very best!

Martha

Adam is certainly correct in saying that you surely should do what feels right to you in your life, which may well be not being immersed in the anal cancer 'community".  That said, I know you have been a wonderful help to me, particularly as I was reeling during treatment.  Your kind and gentle spirit sets the mood for this site. You are the angel of hope!

Love to you,

June