Your Opinion Please

Annabelle41415 said:

Thank you Lori

Thank you for responding and yes just saw your post on the other board.  Just wanted to chime in on the other board that their support was so much appreciated and yours as well.  I'm sorry that you have had to go through so much.  I'm hoping that you are doing well and wish you much health in the new year. 

Kim

Hi Annabelle,

When I had stage 2b lung ca 5 years ago. I had lost 20 lbs of basically muscle before I was diagnosed and had a successful resection.

I had this much weight loss despite eating regularly.

After the resection it took me almost a year to regain the weight back.

This is typical for patients who have cancer or any other major disease insult to the body. Its referred to as a catabolic stress response

where the body would normally burn carbohydrates and fat for fuel it burns muscle mass as a preferred fuel. Folks with advanced

cancer also are hypermetablic since the body is at war with the disease. If he is running a fever as I was, (101-104) this also contributes to the hyper metabolic state.

It sounds like he is getting good treatment with a feeding tube since that may prevent further wasting.

My professional back ground is in selling IV nutrition to hospitals and critical care nursing. I just found this site today and I have not completed my profile yet but I felt for your comment. You are advocating well for your brother. Cancer just stinks.

Regards, Chris

Keep the faith!!!:)

Hi Kim!

Hoping all is going better for your brother. So much happens mentally and physically with the diagnosis, as you have been there and know. The issue is that there are no 2 of us alike. My solution has always been to look at works for others, then tweak it for yourself. There are certain chemos which are more effective on one cell than another -  some are more 'sickening' than others - and we all seem to handle them differently physically. I don't believe it's unusual to be on antidepressants as dealing with this can be overwhelming mentally. I'm hoping the chemo will, in the long run, make your brother feel better. Did the feeding tube help with his weight and stamina? Hoping all of these components will work to get him stronger and better able to deal with with the pain and lack of appetite. Follow your brother's cues and gently support him while prodding him along. I know it can be frustrating, but as you know, going through treatment can be nauseating and exhausting. Gather information! Best wishes! Deb

And thanks to Lori, if you read this, for your help and positive attitude!

(My story 'Putting out Fires' is on my page. Adenocarcinoma of heart doesn't happen? Well, hello!!). 

Annabelle41415 said:

Thank you all

Thank you all for your responses and concern.  My brother is dying and probably too far to help.  He is on a feeding tube and that is the only nutrition that he gets.  He doesn't want visitors so I'm not sure if he will allow me to visit him or not.  I've not seen him since diagnosis because we live out of area.  I'm torn about abiding by his wishing about not seeing him or just go - my SIL needs someone to talk to so bad.  I'm sorry about previous post about your board not caring.  I'm now dealing with a new diagnosis of kidney cancer with my husband, my previous diagnosis with colorectal cancer and now my brother.  I'm just overwhelmed.  Thank you all.

Kim

Kim, I just joined this site today and read your post.  You are dealing with more than one person should have to bear, and it's no wonder you are overwhelmed. I'm so sorry. Your stress level must be through the roof.  I think you need to first look after yourself to be sure you are healthy and strong enough to be able to support your husband as he begins a battle of his own.  No offense to the men out there, but it seems that most men depend on their wives to take charge in situations like this, and he will need you as his caregiver.  It's tough when you are also worried about your brother.  Does your SIL have other family members to help her?  It just isn't possible for you to do much for your brother, but if you really think he is dying, I think you should visit if you can, even if he says no.  A lot of times people will ask others not to visit or do anything for them, but then are depressed that it seemed like no one cared enough to come.  In terms of your original question about your brother not eating, that's what I am going through with my husband now.  He has completed concurrent radiation and chemo treatments, but has just laid in bed the last 2 days and will eat hardly anything.  I am so worried and have tried everything to get him to eat, but then he just gets mad.  It's a viscious cycle -- he feels bad so he won't eat or get up which then makes him that much weaker and feeling that much worse.  I'm afraid that he may be headed toward a blood transfusion and feeding tube if nothing changes soon.