Diagnosed stage 4 just one week ago; very scared and alone.



  • I am alive
    I am alive Member Posts: 315
    MJ, please don't feel guilty

    MJ, please don't feel guilty taking care of yourself. Hit the gym, have lunch with a friend, do what you would normally do. It will make your husband feel better - not such an invalid -  and it will help bring home a sense of normalcy. Remember, you're in for the long haul. On one of these sites - maybe its smart patients - there's a big, long chat about caregivers, by caregivers. You might want to look it up. Don't ever feel alone. you have many friends here, and there.

  • jason.2835
    jason.2835 Member Posts: 337 Member

    Oh, Thomas. Though I am lucky enough to have a great marriage and a supportive family, I cannot tell you how alone I felt at first. its such a shock to know you have this battle ahead that you didn't plan and didn't want. And you almost want to be alone to spare those around you the anguish of watching you go through this battle. The first few days are THE WORST. 

    While I know I am speaking from a much different standpoint in that my road was relatively easy as it was caught early, I can totally relate to the lonely feeling you are experiencing. But that will pass. You need to find a doctor who is a partner with you in this journey. Someone who will figure out a clear plan of attack that is comfortable for you. That will change a lot of things. Once the cancer diagnosis went from crushing pain to "we are going to attack it," things start moving and you barely even have time to feel bad about yourself. I would highly recommend a doctor who feels they can safely remove the tumor. I'm not a doctor but in all my research it's clear that removing the tumor is very important (obviously). 

    Good luck and keep us posted.