My Doctor was a jerk

I too fired my Oncologist and got a new one. When my wife said,"you can't do that."  Yes I can, since i'm paying the bills. I don't have to keep a jerK!!! Good luck to you. Become NED!!

Trubrit said:

Good for you

I am so glad that you are taking the bull by the horns, changing your medical team and getting things moving. 

I hate it when a Doctor stands outside the exam room reading my chart. I'll do that when I'm on a regular visit, but when I go to my Oncologist or surgeon, I want to know that he has read my records before he gets outside the door. 

In fact I called his office today and asked if my latest blood resutls had been recieved and read by the Doctor. 

I pray that your new team will get started with you right away.

This forum is filled with both the good and the sad. There is no denying the fact that we lose our friends here, too many and too often, but while we are alive and kicking, we are kicking and we're here to help others on this journey as well as getting help ourselves. 

Keep that war-face on, and march right into battle. We're by your side. 

And please keep us updated and visit often. 

Yeah, I would find a new oncologist lickety split. Her behavior was not professional, and not to mention flaky! 

As time goes by and new options open up, your primary onc will be an anchor on your team and new specialists you may want to work with will usually contact your primary for a referral or an opinion as to whether the new treatment might help. You will need an advocate, and not someone who has a shallow understanding of your case. 

Good move making a switch now. Good luck with your treatments and welcome to the board.

Karin

Sounds like our experience with my husband's former oncologist.  He drops bombs, then tells you to wait 2 weeks for an appt., reads your chart as you're sitting there (after waiting an hour) and then makes phone calls for consultations while you're there that he should have made prior to your visit.  He's more interested in talking about golf, his vacations, etc. than cancer.  We moved on to a larger, more hopeful and professional cancer center and are SO GLAD we did it.  It's hard and it sucks that sometimes you are treated that way, but it worked out for us.  He called my husband and asked if he did anything wrong after we switched.  I wanted to tell him SO many things, but I didn't.  I just told him it was time for more specialized care. He had told us the 2nd tumor they found in his small intestines was very rare and he was puzzled by it.  New oncologist said it happens around 20% of the time and would not call it rare.  New onc. deals only with GI cancers.  We are SO happy there, there is no comparison to the old place. 

It can feel daunting to start over, but you need to pursue it.  We went to the new place within 24 hours of calling.  They had access to ALL his info, scans, etc.  We did not have to fill out one form or wait for anything.  The old place would make you fill out forms almost every time you went as if you were a brand new patient.  It's amazing how different two places can be (and they are affiliated).

Good luck and keep at it.  It will be well worth it.  Don't let anyone make you feel that way again.

Linda

We have had a couple doctors similar to your description.  We tell them, "Do not even think about billing me or my insurance company!"  We then wrtie certified letters to their practice and the Hospital they are associated with.  In no other business would this level of incompetence be accepted.  (OK, Politicians.)

In no other business could one bill their client with no knowledge of the problem, no preparation for meetings, etc...  Why this is acceptable with our doctors, is mind numbing to me.   We had a Doctor looking at a folder, and telling us he was reading my wife's chart.  There was nothing mentioned about my wife's known chronic disease.  I walked over and grabbed the "Chart" out of his hand.  It was an empty folder!  I then screamed at him and asked for a partner of the business immediately.  When the second Doctor came in, I showed him the fraud that the first Doctor was trying to perpetrate.   We found out from a Doctor friend that the Doc in question was let go and admonished from his rights at the hospital also.  So, I do recommend to complain to the practice. Why should any one else get this bad doctor?

Best Always,  mike

I had similar experiences and that was at the large cancer center, you have to be your own advocate!  It's shameful.  At my original hospital after my first failed surgery, my surgeon did not want to do chemo or radiation.  That was a red flag.  I switched to Sloan, had to wait two months just to get in, then had some warped info going around because residents were not giving complete reports, then the whole team went on vacation!  Finally I said no more students involved, no more waiting, let's get this organized.  My sister stepped in and took notes.  Really my sister and this board are what helped me make sure I was using logic.  If I posted "this is what's happening".  I got back "this is what you should be doing".  I'd call my sister and she'd take notes, we'd come up with our own questions since it's so confusing in the beginning and then we'd ask them all at the next visit (my sister was on the phone through every visit). 

I am so glad things turned out better.  I agree with all the advice. I am 10 weeks out of surgery. It helps to walk as much as you can. My advice is to give yourself plenty of time to heal. We tend to try to rush things. Everyone heals at a different pace. I work at home so I had the ability to adapt my working time.  I started feeling my "new normal" around 8 weeks. I hope that helps. Good luck. You'll be in my prayers. 

Yolanda