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Well said!

GSRon said:

Yes indeedie... what the Fox

Yes indeedie... what the Fox man said...  I kno we all do a lot of good when a newbie shows up, all scared and like 10 of us reply with good thoughts, etc.  You can often see the good in their replies even if they do not come out and say it..  We all do a lot of good when like earlier today a Dr told their patient they have only 3 to 6 months.. we all know that is B.S.  But then we also get folks from other countries that do not have all the treatments we do here in the U.S.  sigh...

Not sure how many of you picked up on it.. but I have purposely kept one of my old posts going... I do that for two main reasons.. one to not just add more posts, but also because of the Wedge A Man...  I miss him so much around here...  so I keep that post going as his comments can stay with me.. and all of you...   Now he is a man that kept helping others, when he was down to his last few breaths..  sigh..  Hope he is making all his putts up there...!

Ron

I've hit the back button instead of submit dozens of times, sometimes just getting it out is all that is needed. I find the cyber-relationships we develop to be quite perplexing, to care so deeply for people I've never met, to wish I could hold their hand or give them a hug when needed just seems so odd. I guess we crave contact no matter what form especially from those with similar experiences, but in "real" life we form bonds with only a small percentage of the people we meet, here its 100%.

GSRon said:

Hmm.. I did something that

Hmm.. I did something that maybe I shouldn't have done..  I looked at a couple of old posts here.. and clicked on the profiles of some folks we had not seen here in a while..  I then saw that a bunch have not been here in about a year... I just hope they moved on and are living happily...  I hope...

Be Well All...!!!

Ron

I have a wonderful husband and a great family support system, but they do not have Cancer! I was a basket case, I was thinking of nothing but Cancer every minute of the day, and crying all the time, even waking my husband at night as he was trying to get some sleep.  He always did the right thing, got up held me and finally I would fall asleep cause I had cried myself out.  I couldn't even say the word Cancer without falling apart! Then someone told me about this site and I was able to read about others going through what I was going through.  And Fox is right, it was a while before I pushed the "enter" key.  I have found out that Kidney Cancer was not a death sentence there are plenty of us out here living and fighting this awful disease, and most importantly still living while fighting, all from reading post from this site!

The friends that I have made on this site are amazing, and are the best support system anywhere, mostly because no matter what we are going through, no matter what the emotion is, and no matter what the results are, they are here to give us love, support, and strength!

If you are at this site for the first time, press the "enter" key, ask your question, cry, get mad, compare, whatever you need you will get answers and support from some of the greatest people on this earth!! 

                                            Thanks for 24 hour support!

                                             Love, Brenda

This is a very interesting topic Fox....one that is going to haunt me for a few days I am sure.  Sometimes things I read here touch my heart, hit a nerve, cause sleepless nights, enlighten me, etc..  I lurked for a very long time.  I didn't know where to begin.  If I started, would I be able to stop.  Would I be understood?  I would assume that there are other caregivers, like myself, that aren't quite sure if they belong here.  ahhhhhh  enter or delete.....and I sat staring at this screen for awhile.  Submit won.

This forum is like crack (I suppose, never having tried it) - I love it, I need it, but I'm thinking it's not  really good for me. By that I mean I am constantly trying to wean myself off my daily, often several times a day, perusal. Two years this summer I wrote my first post.  I met Fox and Wedge and PJune and  ..oh forgive me, John's wife. Senior moment. I can't remember  your sign-on name. It 'll come to me as soon as I push the submit button. Oh, wait!!! Alice!!!!!

But today Wedge is gone and PJune disappeared in a way that makes us think she died suddenly of an unexpected serious side effect. She would never have drifted off, almost mid sentence, in the way that she did. I miss these people. ( I think we form special bonds with the folks who first greet us when we wash ashore here.) .Their absence makes me sad when I log in. Yes, Fox still waves the banner and I smile every time I see a post from him. Our warrior brother who takes no sh-- and dares us to do the same.  But I keep thinking I need to stop trolling so much and get out of the house and live more. (Easier to do once spring arrives.) I don't post much. I let others greet newcomers. I care about all you guys....otherwise why would I keep lurking? But I'm okay with peering over somebody else's shoulders. And I feel bad about that. Unbelievably generous Wedge contributed vital information and good cheer and positivity until he entered the hospital for the last time. He knew exactly what was happening to him but he chose to spend his energy helping others. I fall so far from his example. But we are who we are.

Tomorrow my finger will hover over the GO button as I try to convince myself once again to not  start the day with quick visit to the  KCSN. "Skip it today," I'll say to myself. "Dare you to check it once a week. Can you do that?" What do you think?

Fox, how can we ever get tire of your comments? Remember, Wedgie said you are our poster boy!  Well, I wonder what he would say now!  We love you dearly and you are so encouraging to us all!  We are very happy that you are doing well and hope to see the NED very soon!  I miss Paula too. In fact, right before she left she encouraged me! I was afraid to go for some tests and she talked me into it!  Going through her own hell but was concerne about me! What a gal!  I read one of her posts where she said she lurks and doesn't post. I am still hoping this is the case. Does anyone know her full name and where she lives? Maybe we can check up on her once and for all and see what the story is.  I am hoping she is ok.. Keep up those wonderful posts, Fox  We love you!  XX

Srashedb said:

Caretaker

I understand the bond of those with this disease and I certainly hope that caretakers are included.

My husband does not go to any sites and it is always me who brings up the subject; we have a large and supportive family but they either don't discuss or don't understand that although he's been through many procedures and is regaining weight, he is at high risk for recurrence.

Our sons have their own lives and care very much but it doesn't impact them as it does me; so, it is a lonely place for this caretaker when it comes to husband's health.

We have a 41 year old marriage; I actually was young....so, the idea of not having my best friend, my rock terrorizes me. 

Having this place provides hope, answers and support; I have only been here since last summer but it does appear that the losses are few, even though heart-breaking.

TW was one of a kind, reaching out to help others even as his own health deteriorated. He carefully explained how his situation was different so that no one would lose hope. 

And, Fox, your posts are always of interest.

Sarah

Sarah,

Caregivers are always welcome! In many ways the mental side of this trip is much harder than the physical and you deal mostly with that. As patients we have the disease and all that goes with it to occupy our brains thats mainly on the physical side of things and not facing the fear of losing someone we love on a daily basis and the need to stay strong and positive for them. What you go through is far more difficult and deserving of being here in my opinion. I think as everything is focused on the patient the importance of the caregiver can be overlooked, but not by us, you are our rock, our reason to fight. We appreciate all that you do for us more than you can ever know.

Thank you,

Gary

angec said:

Fox, how can we ever get tire

Fox, how can we ever get tire of your comments? Remember, Wedgie said you are our poster boy!  Well, I wonder what he would say now!  We love you dearly and you are so encouraging to us all!  We are very happy that you are doing well and hope to see the NED very soon!  I miss Paula too. In fact, right before she left she encouraged me! I was afraid to go for some tests and she talked me into it!  Going through her own hell but was concerne about me! What a gal!  I read one of her posts where she said she lurks and doesn't post. I am still hoping this is the case. Does anyone know her full name and where she lives? Maybe we can check up on her once and for all and see what the story is.  I am hoping she is ok.. Keep up those wonderful posts, Fox  We love you!  XX

Hmmm.. been over 2 weeks, and nothing from DJ.. hope she is OK...  

And yes Caregivers are wonderful people...  Sometimes we forget you are not a patient, but very important to those you give care to.  Heck it may be worse on you than for the patient...  Hang around... this helps everyone..!

Ron

I just wanted to admit to lurking.

I enjoy reading everyone's posts. I always enjoy yours. Please post.

I often can't think of anything helpful to say, or if I can, often I'm not sure it's correct. Sometimes I'm just lazy and don't feel like typing a response. I pop in and out often. I also want to admit that I can't keep up with all the new posts from people that have been around awhile, or the new posts from new(er) people.

It's great we have this forum. It's one of the few places I can go and feel like people understand what's going on with me in regards to my anxiety about my cancer. Nobody gets it like you guys. I'm sorry you're all here, but I'm glad I'm not alone.

Todd