My sweet Sister

TracyT831
TracyT831 Member Posts: 4
in Colorectal Cancer #1

Hi all.

Where do I begin.....my sister was diagnosed with Colon Cancer 12/24/12 and told she only had a year, maybe less.  She, thank God, is still with us but is beginning to decline rapidly. 

The cancer has spread to her liver (about 80% filled with tumors), her Kidneys, her stomach lining, her pancreas, and her Sternum bone.  She now has severe swelling due to the kidneys and liver not functioning and is jaundice now in the face (not her eyes yet).  She can't walk anymore due to all the fluid on her legs and they kidneys are being crushed by her liver and the ever growing / expanding tumors in her liver so she is now catherized.   Hospice and their sweet nurses come in every day and love her.

She is the strongest person I have ever met in my life.  Always with a smile on her face.

My question is.....like most people I am sure......what does all this mean?  Does this mean I only have a few more moments, days, weeks, months with my sweet sister?

I know she is in extreme pain and they are treating that with lots of good pain meds but what about the rest....how fast does the decline begin?  How much more does she have to endure? 

I know that no one really can answer the "time line" questions but what might we expect next, just some sort of heads up.....

Thank you all

Comments

  • Lisa2012
    Lisa2012 Member Posts: 142
    #2
    So sorry

    Tracy,

     

    So sorry to hear that you are going through this.  I am a stage IV cancer patient and I often think this disease is wore for the caregivers than it is for me.  A timeline is not possible to determine, all is in God's hands.  Enjoy each moment you have, every day is a gift.   Prayers for you and your sister.

     

     

  • Lovekitties
    Lovekitties Member Posts: 3,364 Member
    #3
    My thoughts are with you

    I lost my sister to uterine cancer 11/15/2013.

    I found the Hospice nurses to be very helpful and knowledgeable.

    While there are certain signs, the nurses may be your best source of the information you seek as it pertains to your sister.

    Wishing her an easy journey and all of her loved ones strength and solace.

    Marie who loves kitties.

     

  • fatbob2010
    fatbob2010 Member Posts: 467 Member
    #4
    So Sorry

    Dear Tracy

    This is a time most of us dread as either caretaker's or patient's Realistically, there is every day and minute you have together.  Since there never seems to be enough time.  My suggestion would be to not worry about how much time, but rather, how to make that time as precisous as possible.  

    Much love and prayer for you, your loved one and the rest of your family.  

    Peace, Art

    P.S. The hosipice nurses can be your best source of help as far as what comes next.  They (IMHO) can/should address your concerns and provide this to you in the form of routine educartion.

  • TracyT831
    TracyT831 Member Posts: 4
    #5
    Thank you all for your words

    Thank you all for your words and message.  You are all right and I treasure each minute I have with her. 

    Thank you all for your comfort

  • LivinginNH
    LivinginNH Member Posts: 1,456 Member
    #6
    Your sister...

    Hi Tracy,

    I've sent you a PM in regard to hospice and a link to an ACS site that may help to answer your questions.  Cherish your time together and take comfort in that the hospice nurses will make her crossover as peaceful as possible.

    All my best,

    Cyn

  • annalexandria
    annalexandria Member Posts: 2,571 Member
    #7
    I'm so sorry that you are facing this with your sister.

    My sister died at the age of 43 from cancer.  She lived only a little over a year past her diagnosis.  This is truly a dreadful and overwhelming experience for everyone involved.  As others have said, hospice should be able to give you some idea of how much time is left.  I would say just try to spend as much time with her as you can.  Every memory that you can make now will be priceless for you in the future.

    Hugs to you, and to your family~AA

  • here4lfe
    here4lfe Member Posts: 306 Member
    #8
    My Wife

    Died within a week after jaundice showed up. Cherish the moments. If her journey is coming to an end, make it one surrounded by family, peace, and love.

    Mark

     

  • suekell
    suekell Member Posts: 11
    #9
    here4lfe said:

    My Wife

    Died within a week after jaundice showed up. Cherish the moments. If her journey is coming to an end, make it one surrounded by family, peace, and love.

    Mark

     

    So sorry

    Dear Tracy...

    I am so so sorry to hear that your sister is suffering but i am sure that by you being there for her is a massive comfort. I hope she is made as comfortable and pain free as possible so you can spend quality time together and enjoy every precious moment.

    My heart goes out to you both 

     

    Sue 

  • TracyT831
    TracyT831 Member Posts: 4
    #10
    I am so sorry to hear of each

    I am so sorry to hear of each of your tragic stories.  It is truly heartbreaking to know that my sister won't be with me for much longer.

    An update - she has good and bad days now, is jaundice, especially in her face, but the nurses say that is to be expected.  However, they did say to watch her eyes, which thankfully are clear at this time.

    She is still in pain and is beginning to see "hallucinations", hopefully that is the morphine they give to combat the pain.  She is so brave - much more so that I could be - I think.  She is now pretty much bed-ridden as the fluid can't be drained from her safely and they don't think it is a good decision for her to move.    She still hasn't lost that smile or sweeet spirit yet. 

    Thank you all again - this is a nice release for me.....

  • peterz54
    peterz54 Member Posts: 341
    #11
    TracyT831 said:

    I am so sorry to hear of each

    I am so sorry to hear of each of your tragic stories.  It is truly heartbreaking to know that my sister won't be with me for much longer.

    An update - she has good and bad days now, is jaundice, especially in her face, but the nurses say that is to be expected.  However, they did say to watch her eyes, which thankfully are clear at this time.

    She is still in pain and is beginning to see "hallucinations", hopefully that is the morphine they give to combat the pain.  She is so brave - much more so that I could be - I think.  She is now pretty much bed-ridden as the fluid can't be drained from her safely and they don't think it is a good decision for her to move.    She still hasn't lost that smile or sweeet spirit yet. 

    Thank you all again - this is a nice release for me.....

    Sorry, for your sister and for you...

    Tracy  I also recommend hospice.   My wife Patricia passed a while back and it was liver tumors which were the cause.   They were also the source of significant pain which I'm sorry to say the hospital did not manage well.   Our local hospice was in our home 24/7 for the final week.   Once hospices nurse took over, pain managment was far better and almost seamless.  They were right there, always attentive.  I don't believe they relied on morphine or at least not totally.   

    peter 

     

  • TracyT831
    TracyT831 Member Posts: 4
    #12
    Update on my Sweet Sister

    I visited with her this past weekend.  She has jaundice now in her eyes, eating very little but loves Starbucks Mocha Frap's.  I made sure to bring her one......she has be come addicted LOL.

    She has constant pain in her stomach from the spread of it to her pancreas now but they have begun giving her Methadone with the liquid fast acting Morphine now.

    Hospice is there EVERY day and say that it is only a matter of a few weeks.  Without Hospice I know my family and especially my sweet sister would be completely lost.  She loves her nurse and I know the feeling is mutual.  What a sweet lady she is.

    So, here we sit, waiting, which is horrible to think and say, but waiting I am.....not sure what else to do.

    Thanks to all for listening.

  • annalexandria
    annalexandria Member Posts: 2,571 Member
    #13
    TracyT831 said:

    Update on my Sweet Sister

    I visited with her this past weekend.  She has jaundice now in her eyes, eating very little but loves Starbucks Mocha Frap's.  I made sure to bring her one......she has be come addicted LOL.

    She has constant pain in her stomach from the spread of it to her pancreas now but they have begun giving her Methadone with the liquid fast acting Morphine now.

    Hospice is there EVERY day and say that it is only a matter of a few weeks.  Without Hospice I know my family and especially my sweet sister would be completely lost.  She loves her nurse and I know the feeling is mutual.  What a sweet lady she is.

    So, here we sit, waiting, which is horrible to think and say, but waiting I am.....not sure what else to do.

    Thanks to all for listening.

    I'm glad you're there with her...

    as hard as it is, it's a gift, really, to be with them at the end.  Waiting together is a little less painful than waiting alone.  I'm sure she appreciates your presence.

    Warm hugs to you both~AA

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