just starting out

You don't say whether or not you've been staged, but the details of your post sounds like you may be stage 3.  You will find many stage 3 survivors on this site.  Don't despair.  Email them directly to get their stories and advice.  Now is the time to draw on your network of family, friends and colleagues.  It is surprising and heartening to find out how many people want to help and care about you.  I have found that when you reach out, surprising things happen.  

Second opinion of diagnosis is good.  Also ask for a second opinion on treatment.  I have found that treatment varies widely by institution and region of the country.  Don't forget to ask about clinical trials.  There are alot of them going on all over the country.  You should have a treatment team made up of at least an oncologist and surgeon.  A radiation oncologist may be added if your treatment includes radiation.  You may also have a GI doctor or even a GP as part of your team, depending on your healthcare system.  It is important to feel comfortable and confident with each member of your team.  You have the right to ask that any or all of them be replaced with another doctor.  If you want to go out-of-network for treatment, talk to your insurance company right away and keep insisting. 

Remember that the commonly cited EC statistics apply to large numbers of people, so they do not make any accurate statement about an individual.  My husband was Stage 2 N0 M0 and he had surgery.  The treatment consumed 8 months of our lives.   There were many, many adjustments, that did not end with surgery.  But we've taken one thing at a time as we've probed to understand what may lie ahead.  You can do this, too, with courage and strength, and the love and care from those around you.

Good luck. 

hello,

i say this to everybody who is new: make sure you have been tested for HER2 or are going to be tested for her2 if you have an operation. it affects treatment. if it isnot  mentioned to you make sure to ask about it.

all the best,

danièle 

You're right about this being a life changer.  Accepting that is a large part of finding ways to deal with what lies ahead for you.  No one can tell you exactly what you'll experience b/c everyone gets affected differently even if they're receiving similar treatment for a similar situation.  The one thing you can be asssured of is that you will be affected in ways that are different from your first 52 years.  Speaking of which, it is in your favor that you are relatively young and that you say you're in good pysical condition.  In enduring treatments, young & strong is the thing to be.  Stage IV will not usually include surgery as an option to you, but stage III will frequently be operable, especially if the person is relatively young & fit.  As far as getting chemo goes, it can certainly be very disquieting when you are first approaching it, but hopefully your oncologist is adept at managing the side effects.  As far as nutrition and eating go, ask your doc about taking some vitamins or other supplements (for protein or calories or whatever you may need).  I don't think there will be any impact on your ability to eat from chemo (actually, a lot of folks report that it's easier to eat b/c the chemo is shrinking the tumor), although it may well reduce your desire to eat and your enjoyment of food/drink.  It's been my experience (and I believe most other folks' as well) that radiation and surgery have a vastly more significant impact on your ability to eat.  As long as you're getting enough calories and nutrition, I'd suggest eating whatever is most appealing to you at any given time.  For dealing withh the mental aspects of what you'll be doing, looking at it as a time-limited thing that you just have to endure might be helpful.  Realizing that it's short term and that you've already completed xx%, so what's another yy% can be a motivator to continue and complete your treatment.  

A further couple of things:  This is a very personal thing, base your decision making on what you think is going to work best for you, not on what someone else thinks is best for you.  Also, while no one else will have the exact experience you're going to have, someone will undoubtedly have experienced each aspect, even the craziest sounding things.  Someone here will probably be able to share their own experience and let you know what worked/didn't work for them.

Best wishes as you start down this road,

Ed

I toowas to healthy to be sick, but last year a this time I was in chemo and radiation. Surgery was later in July. I was lucky, I had known my abdominal surgeon for 15 years, I was an emergency department Registered Nurse. I hope things are going well, maintain a positive atttitude.

Now I only have slight difficulty getting a deep breath while running, I was a miler.

Good luck!