That Time Again

osmotar
osmotar Member Posts: 1,006
in Head and Neck Cancer #1

Hi everyone , while I don't post all that often anymore , I still stop by now and then to see how you are all doing . As for me I'm sitting waiting to go into my 6 month CT scan , had my labs earlier this week and all good, see my onco next wed for the checkup ... But still the scanexity ... Even though in 2 weeks I will be out of treatment 2 years , I feel great , a little dry mouth now and then , I eat better than I ever did pre-C , I work full time , yet sitting here today I still get flash backs of all day chemo every 21 days , how  I hated that dang 5FU pump and fanny pack thing it was in, radiation everyday for 7 1/2 weeks ... While I did really well thru all treatments , is it possible that we have cancer PTSD? Just rambling I guess trying to rationalize the thoughts and feelings... I'll go into this 6 month scan , head up ,one foot in front of the other , knowing that like so many of you , we are a band of unique warriors , and this is just an other step in the journey.

take care all ... Blessings & Light

linda 

Comments

  • jim and i
    jim and i Member Posts: 1,788 Member
    #2
    Praying still NED
    Debbie

    Praying still NED

    Debbie

  • phrannie51
    phrannie51 Member Posts: 4,716
    #3
    Yes...we do seem to have a

    cancer PSTD and scanxiety seems to bring it to a head every few months.  I wish I had a trick up my sleeve to relieve it, so far none of my tricks work for me....I sit on the edge of a cliff until I hear the words NED......then all the fear/nerves/symptoms magically disappear. 

    Sending positive mojo.....I'm sure we'll be hearing NED from you in just a few days.

    p

  • debbiejeanne
    debbiejeanne Member Posts: 3,102 Member
    #4
    linda, sending lots of

    linda, sending lots of prayers and good mojo your way!!

    God bless,

    dj

  • katenorwood
    katenorwood Member Posts: 1,912
    #5
    hello Linda !

     It sounds like your life is rocking !  Sending POSITIVE thoughts your direction wonderful lady !  When the darn scanxiety is in the house I say chase it out with the broom !  Hugs sent !  Katie 

  • CivilMatt
    CivilMatt Member Posts: 4,724 Member
    #6
    nice

    Linda,

    You sound like you are doing well.  The 2-year mark is a good one.

    Best,

    Matt

  • Duggie88
    Duggie88 Member Posts: 760 Member
    #7
    Linda

    I suspect it will lurk in our minds forever. But my theory is lurking takes up time and if it comes back we fight it. But at this stage in life with no fight in the picture, I'm going to live it. Spending the kids inheritance is so much fun.

    Heal on Linda your doing just fine.

          Jeff

  • boardwalkgirl
    boardwalkgirl Member Posts: 269
    #8
    RIGHT THERE WITH YOU

    Linda, I am right there with you. I go Monday for my 6 month scan. The scanxiety has been running wild for about the past month. I thought it would get easier but it hasn't and I just can't get it out of my head. I think it being the Holiday season has made it worse because that thought keeps sneaking in my mind, could this be my last?? Of course no one ever knows that but I love Christmas so much and I just try to make it the best I can for our family. I have tried to just turn the worry over to God but I guess I am not succeeding at that either. I will be praying that you get an all clear. NED is what I love to hear. Scan Monday, and 3 doctors Tuesday. And hopefully celebrating Tuesday night! 

  • denistd
    denistd Member Posts: 597
    #9
    boardwalkgirl said:

    RIGHT THERE WITH YOU

    Linda, I am right there with you. I go Monday for my 6 month scan. The scanxiety has been running wild for about the past month. I thought it would get easier but it hasn't and I just can't get it out of my head. I think it being the Holiday season has made it worse because that thought keeps sneaking in my mind, could this be my last?? Of course no one ever knows that but I love Christmas so much and I just try to make it the best I can for our family. I have tried to just turn the worry over to God but I guess I am not succeeding at that either. I will be praying that you get an all clear. NED is what I love to hear. Scan Monday, and 3 doctors Tuesday. And hopefully celebrating Tuesday night! 

    PTSD

    Hi Linda, yes PTSD is a real and not uncommon result of cancer. I was officially diagnosed with it a month ago and am now in therapy, PTSD sucks, robs you of joy and can be very frightening, but we face it, as we did cancer, and fight. Denis

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