Does anyone else get uneasy on your treatment "anniversaries"?
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DATES
I do still remember the dates, as it all happened last year. I think that it is because some of those dates were, to me, milestones as I worked my way back to some sort of normalcy. My tests were throughout December 2011; my diagnosis was January. Surgery, chemo, and then rads took me to the end of September last year. Now I look back at those dates and see how far I have come.
I think that as I get farther away from those dates, I get a little more apprehensive about my upcoming appointments as they draw near, wondering if something will show up -- I am one who seems to "grow things." I try not to let that become a consuming thought, though. I have my three-month check Monday with my oncologist.
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Peg, I always feel guiltypegalina said:cancer check ups
Hi Bluewillo, I cant stand cancer check-ups..I do not sleep the night before..then when I go..I have to walk thru the cancer ward..brings everything back full-swing..I'm trying to put it behind me..well..I'll never put it behind me..@ least once a day I remember..& I dont think it will ever go away
When I go to the oncdoc's office...cos I'm usually telling him how tired I am, how I think I have a touch of PTSD...and this n that hurts-sadly, he's one of those docs who hasn't gotten the memo on cancer survivors and PTSD. And then I see the really sick women getting chemo and I feel so ungrateful. I also feel like that feeling will never go away, but I think it will. I'm kinda sorta planning my life so that if the cancer comes back, I'll be ready for it. Yes, that is correct....I BOUGHT 2 NEW PAIRS OF COWGIRL BOOTS! Frakkin' cancer won't stand a chance!!!
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anniversary dates...
Traci,
I haven't reached the anniversary point yet - as I just went thru / and still going thru this - but, I'm one that keeps a journal (love to write) So, I do know every date as to what happened and when...I also wanted to keep track of patricular dates for future appointments/tests/treatments and such...I'm one that's forgetful -
When my anniversary date does roll around - I am going out to celebrate!!!!! And, if I don't have any other problems I will probably celebrate yearly...I'm always thinking it's going to 'pop up' in the other breast - I'm just a pessimistic. But, I live my life to the fullest...as life is too precious not too...
Whatever you may 'feel' is normal - they're yours to have...
Andi ~
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