Back from Mastectomy

I had my mastectomy at a teaching hosp. The surgeon came in took off the dressings, she said it looked good from a med standpoint. Left the room to give.me.time alone to see it. I was very emotional and crying. Seeing it was the.first.time that it hit me that I really had cancer. I was a.mess. I had a uti, was crying, when a teaching dr.came and asked if he could bring in students. I said not now. He left came back.10 seconds later with 8 students. I asked him to leave and he.ignored.me. The surgeon was at.the.door, heard the exchange, took charge.and kicked him.out, said I had rights.and he overstepped them. She.redressed the.wounds, told me I had to stay another.nite, hugged me and left. 15 min later, a nurse came in said I had to be out in 15 min or I would have pay for another night out of pocket. that insurance would only.allow 1 night. Even with an infection. So I packed up,put on sweats. She had me sit at nurses desk with.a.102 temp waiting for.my sister to come. About 5, I got a call from.surgeon wanting to know why I went homet, explained. The.nurse never called for an approval. Never got a.script for antibiotics. My sister called raised hell with.nurse. Asked for spvr. He called me in am. The nurse had charted that I left on my own after my surgeon reamed her. The o.ly good thing was the night.of surgery was opening.cerimonies of.the 2002 Olympics and my room overlooked the.stadium at.the.U so I had a.great view of fireworks and I was.watching the program with great seat. It only took a few days.to get.use to my chest, and that was the.beginning of my treatment and also the.beginning of my healing. After reconstruction, I went to get.the.nip tatoo, and ended up instead wih a beautiful tatoo of a hummingbird suckling a beautiful pink hibiscus. Now I see these scars as beauty, not only the artwork, but knowing that this shgery removed.the.cancer and I have been blessed with 8 1/2 years with Ned, and have beed fighting for 3 years with Mets. It takes time, but my scars and tats remind me of how blessed I am.

I had a left breast mastectomy - and I am small chested anyway - so it wasn't to devestating for me...I also had an expander put in at the time of my 1st surgery.  I was just greatful the scar didn't resemble what my grandmothers' had looked like 30 yrs ago.  I remember her chest looked like railroad tracks...they sure have come a long way since the '80's...I do think that vitamin E oil might help to minimize the scarring...I've been using that and aloevera cream ever since I started radiation.  You'll heal inside and out and you'll still be beautiful - regardless of 'boobs' ...    Now get to healing....

IE_Hope said:

The Aftermath

I was fortuante in that every one in the hospital were extremely pleansant and very compassionate, even the Dr. I also got an infection but in the JP drain.  I thought I was prepared but like many of you I really was not prepared to see what it looked like and even after 3 weeks I still have a hard time.  I do feel better knowing that I am not by myself.  Thank you everyone for your replies.

 

love and hugs

 

To IE_Hope,

I wasn't upset as I had looked in a few books what it would look like.  I had abdominal surgery 3 months earlier, a staph infection and 2 more surgeries.  When I looked at myself at home and saw all the scars I had, I was very upset.  The surgeon left what is known back then as a "dog ear" a flap of skin.  It looked awful.  I eventually had it removed.  

I remember one woman telling me that in due time, I would not even think about it.  In one way it was true.  I didn't have reconstruction and putting on my prosthesis was as normal as brushing my teeth.  One morning, going to work, I had gotten in my car and kept thinking I forgot something.  I looked over on the passenger seat, I went over mentally, purse, lunch and etc.

Then I looked down and realized that I had forgotten to put on my prosthesis.  So I guess that woman was correct, in due time, you do forget about it.

Best of luck to you,

Doris

Yes I know exactly where your head is right now. I looked on the internet and I saw what it looked like but when it was me if was devastating!

The drains alone freaked me out! I had a morphine drip and the pain was terrible. The day after surgery when I was able to move better they gathered 6 women (including me) into a conference room in the hospital to discuss how to care for our drains and how to exercise our arms.

I was in such disbelief and I looked around the room and felt worse for everyone in the room especially those girls in their early 20's!!!

You need to walk with one foot in front of the other.....one day at a time....nothing more! Breast Cancer is a lesson on putting yourself first and have patience! No its not fun...no its not something we feel we deserved BUT this is our life's journey and BC is part of the trip!

As you go through the next phase it will be expanders and being pumped up. That is something else you'll need to adjust to.

Just realize you are not alone. We are all here...having gone through and/or going through it at the same time as you.

I actually met Bethsbaby Lynne on here when I was going through it...she reached out to me. It was a big help to me. We are now great friends!!!!

Once you get the drains out and then expanders changed out...the scars will heal....you can hardly see mine. I also used scar tissue to make nipples. You would never know mine are not real.

Am I upset that I have no sensation....yes very....but I am glad I am alive and if that was my trade off...then OH WELL!!!!

You did what you had to do to get rid of the big "C" be proud that you came this far!!! You are a sister warrior!!!

You will be fine and better than before ...you'll see. Just be kind to yourself. If you need to ever talk reach out to me and I will give you my number. ((HUGS))

Patrice

IE_Hope said:

The Aftermath

I was fortuante in that every one in the hospital were extremely pleansant and very compassionate, even the Dr. I also got an infection but in the JP drain.  I thought I was prepared but like many of you I really was not prepared to see what it looked like and even after 3 weeks I still have a hard time.  I do feel better knowing that I am not by myself.  Thank you everyone for your replies.

 

love and hugs

 

You are never by yourself.  You've got a whole group of pink sisters!

Angie2U said:

Hoping and praying you don't

Hoping and praying you don't need chemo too.  Let us know what he says.

Good luck,

Angie

Wishing you good luck tomorrow.  Hoping for no chemo!

IE_Hope said:

Need Chemo

Well I got the news today,  I need Chemo.  I go in next week for the picc line then get appts for Chemo. Dr said I would need to go every week to have the picc line cleaned and the next day after Chemo I need to go in for an injection to prevent infections which will cause my bones to ache,  what the heck,  more pain !  After Chemo is done he will put me on Tamoxofin.  When will this night mare end?

 

De

I had 4 treatments of red devil ( adrimycin and cytoxin) and now am ready for 12 weeks of taxol. I have my last neulasta shot today! My onco told me to take Claritin, the day of chemo and 2 days post to help with bone pain and it has worked well. Don't understand how a histamine does that, but, who am I to question? Ask your onco about it. The neulasta makes the bones work harder to produce more white cells, that's where the pain comes from. I have had a few side effects, but nothing really major. Chemo has went fast for me. I took the does dense treatments, every 2 weeks rather than every 3 weeks. I loose taste about day 3, get tired and have racing heart beats for a few days and constipation is bad. That's been the worst for me, but it could have been worse. Hang in there friend!