I CAN TALK!!!

on 2/28/12 i had a complete laryngectomy for cancer of the larynx, stage 3 (i had 35 rad trmnts in sept./oct., 09, this was a recurrence).  since the surgery, i've tried several devices to make me talk.  one was a sticky thing that stuck to my neck around the stoma.  trouble was they never lasted more than 10 minutes b/c i would cough up phylem and it got between my skin and the sticky.  that broke the seal and i couldn't talk b/c the air leaked.  i also tried a plastic sticky w/the same issue.  again, couldn't talk.  then i bought this thing called a lary button.  the speech therapist said f i didn't cough when we put it in, then it wasn't in.  well, i coughed every time we tried it.  i coughed it right out!  that piece didn't even let me talk for 1 minute, much less any longer!  well, i withdrew from my family, friends and life in general.  we had a family gathering in may.  everyone was laughing and talking and just having a good time and there i was unable to participate.  it depressed me so i went n the house and went 2 bed.  i pretty much spent everyday in my room, alone.  i felt completely disconnected from the world and totally alone.  well, i had an appt w/the ent on 7/18/13 and the speech therapist stopped n 2 c how i was do'n.  i told her not good b/c i still couldn't talk.  well, i couldn't believe what happened!  she said, "i can put holes in ur lary tube and u'll b able 2 talk, do u want me 2 do that?"  HELL YES!!  y didn't she do this 2 start with 1.5 yrs ago???  y did i have 2 go 1.5 years not talking?  y did i have 2 spend all that money on crap that didn't work?  y did i have to suffer such a deep depression and withdraw?  i have been talking non stop since she put the holes in.  i still cough up mucus but i simply clean the lary tube w/a tissue and i'm right back 2 talking!  it took her less than a minute to put the holes (3) in the tube!  i thot my sister was going 2 cry when i called and told her.  after our phone call ended, she waited 15 minutes then called me back to hear me say hello.    this was my first phone call.  it sure feels good 2 b able to answer the phone.  oh, yea, we went out to eat from the doctor's office and for the 1st time n 1.5 years, i ordered my own food!!  i go out 2 eat now whenever i want.  i also go to thestore and anything else normal people do.  i can talk for myself now and its a great feeling.  no more wanting people to b able to read my lips and we would both get discouraged.

i know there is only one other person here w/a complete laryngectomy but we may have more in the future.  this is to let them know there is an easy way for them to talk and they don't have to go thru what i did.  sharon, i think ur husband talks already but f not, maybe this can help him.  john, now f u call me, i can answer   !

God bless,

dj