What gets you through?

I hope these don't seem too trite, but they are my honest responses.

My list:

1)      Song: Centerfield (aka: Put Me In Coach) – John Fogerty

2)      My happy place – My Garden or, when feasible, the Chesapeake Bay

3)      My dog named Precious (Only a 15 year old would do that to a dog.)

4)      Movie: Somewhere in Time or, oddly, Deep Impact. Yes, I am a romantic, incurably.

5)      Working in my kitchen, distracted by my mistress, cooking!

6)      BIG Thunderstorms with lots of lightning and thunder. (Much to the chagrin of     Precious)

There are other things-I often retreat in my memory and relive times when life was simpler and tomorrow always promised another day of hope and expectation.

You asked!

Michael

elpasorudy said:

Unwinding

I have had a lot going on in my life over the past year. My father died November 30. My wife Mary Ann lost her five-year battle with uterine papillary serous carcinoma June 1. My mother died four days later. I was told Friday that I probably have kidney cancer. When Mary Ann was alive, I used to pray that God would keep me healthy until after she died so that I could take good care of her. When the urologist gave me his tentative diagnosis Friday, I said to God: "Really? You couldn't give me a few more months of good health." Music keeps me in good spirits as does yard work.

Music: "I Gotta Feeling" by the Blackeye Peas, Lady Gage, Journey, Dixie Chicks, Marvin Gaye, Dire Straits, "Come on Eileen" by Dexys Midnight Runners.

Exercise: Walking (I was doing four miles a day on treadmill), have started walking in local park. Enjoy mowing the lawn, landscaping and other yard work.

Calming influence: I wear my wife's baseball cap. She was a beautiful person, inside and out. She handled her cancer with tenacity, courage, dignity and tears.

Movies: "Beasts of the Southern Wild", "Defending Your Life," "Little Miss Sunshine"

 

 

 

Thumbs up on Defending Your Life! 

A great film!

I'm sorry that life has handed you so much strife.  Quoting another wise friend here named Texas Wedge, who quotes yet someone else, "Accept the change and keep moving forward."

Embroil yourself with this group of fine people!  They are quite unlike any I've ever met. They have, each one, found a special place in my life.

(I think my wife is beginning to suspect!) 

Michael

Sources of strength for me (as caretaker) are friends, family, and,  of course, John. 

But I think you’re talking about the places I  go when no one is looking or at least when no one suspects I need that extra infusion of whatever it is that ignites my courage and inner  strength.   Personal refuges for me are quiet times at water’s edge, particularly at the Ocean where the quiet is only interrupted by the sound of the surf on the sand, but the Inner Harbor  and Chesapeake work too. Then there's the thunderstorms and the tin roof lullabies that come with them.  And I can't forget the love and company of animals, both at home and in nature.  All  provide me that zap during down times. 

 Music also holds a strong spot for me.  And I find myself at moments craving to hear the words of songs  I love, though the words are not always relevant.  There are way too many to mention but ones that immediately scream VOLUME UP are Tim McGraw’s “Live Like You Were Dying,” and Alicia Keys’ “Empire State of Mind.”  But I also never  get tired of forever classics like Judy Garland’s “Over the Rainbow”. Another one that always inspires is Dan Fogelberg’s “Run for the Roses” . “Run for the Roses”, as most realize, was written for the Kentucky Derby, but I so love the  chorus,  “ And it's run for the roses as fast as you can. Your fate is delivered, your moment's at hand. It's the chance of a lifetime in a lifetime of chance. . .” That’s one of those songs I instantly loved first time I heard it and  still do to this day. . .

MeMeJoy said:

Animals!!!!

I can't believe I left my 4 legged baby off my list!!! Our dog ( Luke "sky walker" - the most awesome Great Pyreneese in the world) is a huge source of strength for me! The week after I came home from the hospital he laid by my side and never moved unless I did. Animals are amazing. He is definately a rock and if I ever need a good cry, like a really good all out boo-hoo ugly cry, he never judges

My Wife and Grand-daughter put up a kennel for Precious to keep her from jumping up on me or rough-housing, as we are wont to do, following my surgery. It lasted a day before I put my foot down.

Precious somehow knew I was fragile and was as gentle with me as I suspect she would be with one of her own pups, if she were allowed to have them. I've had many remarkable dogs in my 66 plus years, but she ranks at the top!

Gross as it may seem to some, big sloppy dog kisses have the greatest emotional healing power I've ever known.

It would be a very dark world indeed wthout them!

MDCinSC said:

LOL

My Wife and Grand-daughter put up a kennel for Precious to keep her from jumping up on me or rough-housing, as we are wont to do, following my surgery. It lasted a day before I put my foot down.

Precious somehow knew I was fragile and was as gentle with me as I suspect she would be with one of her own pups, if she were allowed to have them. I've had many remarkable dogs in my 66 plus years, but she ranks at the top!

Gross as it may seem to some, big sloppy dog kisses have the greatest emotional healing power I've ever known.

It would be a very dark world indeed wthout them!

I couldn't agree with you more. You guys might enjoy this clip that a friend sent to me. Remarkable animals. Don't have a dog now but I did.  When he*(Magoo*) died, it almost destroyed me. And to this day, I cannot bring myself to get another dog, and it's been 13 years. I do, however, still have a cat that he rescued 14 years ago as a tiny kitten, one of many he rescued during his time with me.  So Magoo's memory is alway close at heart.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Jb8qMM-bXs

I'm with you Michael, no therapy is better than dog therapy.

What gets me through is first and formost remaing focused at the the present, and not thinking past the next scan....that works for 2 1/2 months; the last half month becomes problematic (I am 1 week away from my next set).

Specific things:

Driving my car hard

Spending time with my family

Baseball (Go Nats, please win a few in a row)

Music (Bruce!:  No Surrender)

For those owie days, pain meds

MDCinSC said:

Amen Alice!
I was the same

Amen Alice!

I was the same way for a long time.  I lost a lovely, smart, loving border collie back in 1995 to cancer. I didn't wnat anymore of the loss and hurt that went with having a dog, that is until 2009 when Precious was thrust into my life. LOL  I am so glad it didn't take even one day longer!

It was a hard lesson well learned. If it ever comes to that again, I will not wait that long. The love given is far more powerful and postive than the loss and heartbreak.  Plus,there are lots of dogs ending up in shelters these days, being "recycled" as it were, out of need or simple inconvenience to their owners.  There is a whole lot of love wasting away, or being put down, in shelters.

Never again!

Michael

 

 

 

Michael-I agree with everything you say. Most of my volunteer time is going toward cat and dog rescue and whatever it takes to lower the euthanasia rate of healthy animals. The current euthanasia rate is a national disgrace IMO. The thought that our society continues to think cats and dogs (and other animals) are disposable is horrendous. I've fostered a couple of dogs (and one was a beautiful border collie) over the past few years and may do more in the future. But prior to retiring in February (2013), my days were too long to have a dog full-time. After losing Magoo, I slowly began volunteering in rescue projects that eventually lengthened my days to  11 or 12 hours a day.  

I know one day I'll adopt another dog or one will adopt me. Magoo found me many years ago in a local park. Could never find out where he came from though I advertised, but I''ve come to think of our meeting as something other than mere coincidence.  Even after finding Magoo a new home, the new owners enacted the return policy and I ended up with him again. In retrospect, Magoo was the best things that ever happened to me. Right now, most of the dogs at local rescues (in Baltimore) are pitbulls or pitbull mixes. I have no problem with them personally. (I've never met a dog I didn't love.) But, unfortunately, many pitbulls cannot  be trusted with cats. And I can't put my cats in harm's way.  But everything you say is right; it will happen and maybe sooner than I expect.

Dan-Magoo was a Dachshund mix, but looked and acted 99% Dachshund, so my heart melted when I read about your dog. A dear friend has a pair of them that I visit anytime I have the opportunity. i'm  so jealous.

I apologize to other members of the Board for going off topic here, but get me talking about animals,  and I don't shut up.  Hope I haven't offended anyone.

dhs1963 said:

What gets me through?

What gets me through is first and formost remaing focused at the the present, and not thinking past the next scan....that works for 2 1/2 months; the last half month becomes problematic (I am 1 week away from my next set).

Specific things:

Driving my car hard

Spending time with my family

Baseball (Go Nats, please win a few in a row)

Music (Bruce!:  No Surrender)

For those owie days, pain meds

 

When it comes to dogs. I don't have any. But my wife has 5! This week it's 6 as we are sitting our daughters while she is at the beach. Also we are sitting her fish and 4 birds. Plus a cat of our own. What a zoo. My interests have not changed. Most important are my 2 granddaughters. My motorcycle, golf, and guitars are next. I continue to exercise but find weight training hurts the rib mets too much. Jogging less but bicycle riding more. I'll be unable to do much with upcoming treatments so I may just let it all slide for awhile. Then start over ..again..One thing that I really appreciate is being retired. It has allowed me to dummy down. More time to stop and smell the roses. I don't care about the date, politics, or weather. I like that alot. Also and very importantly, I have not slipped even one notch in maintaining a positive attitude. I live every day as if I have a million more in front of me. (I don't buy much new stuff though. Still working on using up all the stuff I got.) Maybe being half brain dead from the seventies makes me oblivious. But don't care. Life is good!