Scared

Pauley,

The truth is that you will be fine. You are having surgery to attack and remove a small tumor in your body. There is CANCER and there is cancer. You got the little one and you will be fine. It is normal to be scared when you here the word cancer and surgery at the same time. All of us on this board have either had Kidney cancer or are caregivers for someone who had kidney cancer.

You are one of the lucky ones whose cancer was found early and a full recovery from the surgery alone is in the cards,

You will be in the hospital for a couple of days, home on the couch for a few weeks and backto work in a month or 6 weeks depending on what you do.

The surgery is not  fun, but it beats the alternative. Mine was 11 years ago. Faye across the street is 82 and hers was 18 years ago, 

Icemantoo

pauley13 said:

Thanks G!  i have 3 beautiful babies i want to see graduate college!!  I have always been healthy, i dont smoke, i am not overweight or have any other health issues, so this was a big shock for me.

 

Crystal

For stage 1 RCC, which is what it sounds like you have, the treatment hurts a lot more than anything else.  With that said, you need the treatment, which is surgery, as you know.

You will get through the pain, and with a little luck, will be back to normal by mid july.  Or you will define a new normal.

I had my surgery on June 19, 2012.  It has been hard; my tumor was somewhhat bigger, and has matastistised.  But, I am still alive and typing.  And living.  Make sure you have help at home for the first 3-4 weeks, and possibly up to six.  But, the long term prognosos is excellent.  You should live to see your babies get married.

I remember that feeling of  first "What the hell did he say," and then breaking the news to family and keeping a calm demeanor while my mind was reeling.

I am four weeks out from, surgery as of today. Mine was 4.5 cm, grade 3.  The procedure was a hand assist Laparascopic radical nephrectomy (you'll learn this jargon pretty quickly.) I am fine and I will continue to be fine as long as I remain positive and follow through.  I am planning on being shot by a jealous husband on my 93rd birthday.  I feel you will have equal prospects!

Be grateful it was found early and you have a loving family to support you!  Bring them into the loop.  They need to know what is happening and why, adjusted to age appropriateness. They also need to see you armed with a positive attitude and an understanding of what is going on.  They deserve that.

Use this site for your education.  There are lots of people here whop have gone through this whole process and can help you allay any anxieties.

If you have to be in a club like this, you have picked a good one!  Welcome, with all the regrets for needing to be here!

Michael

pauley13 said:

Thanks

After all this i am really starting to feel a little better.  Most things you find online are so negative, its good to hear some POSITIVE

 

Crystal

Most of the stuff on line is about more advanced cancer:  mets and all.  Without mets, the cancer is likely cured with surgery, particularly, if it is low grade (you will know that after the pathology report).  You still have the followup scans and all, but that is it. 

Regarding what you read on line, 1) it is based on data that is 5+ years old.  In addition, individuals that blog tend to write about problems.  Even on this board, with one or two exceptions, the people that are here a lot have more advanced cancer.  So, it makes things look bad.  But even those with advanced cancer are still here...Fox, Texas, and others (myself included).

Darron said:

Crystal

I had a much larger tumor - more than 15 cm and was out of the hospital in 3 days. I was out of work a total of 3 weeks after surgery. I recovered quickly with lots mild short walks, lots of water and rest. My surgery was a hand assisted laproscopy.

I am a fellow non smoker, healthy, 43 year old with 11 and 14 year old boys. We told the boys early and have involved them with some limtations. Cancer impacts the entire family, not just you. You are scared of the unknown, they are too. There are plenty of caregivers on this site too.

if you only have a urologist at this point, I would suggest an oncologist meeting as well. IF you ever do need follow up treatment, you will already have an established relationship. Find an oncologist that specializes in kidney cancer, not just any oncologist. Kidney cancer can be sneaky, and a eye trained to look will do a better job of reviewing your follow up scans.

keep in mind when you read anything from the internet, you are reading old data. If you look at a five year survival rate, you are looking at 5 year old data And treatments.Most of the treatments you see mentioned have been released in the last couple years, if not months.

Stay positive and know you can beat this, and you will!

 

I agree with Darron and believe both of his comments are important.  I think the phrase " When one person has cancer the entire family has cancer" is really true .  I did not handle telling my children well.........especially my daughter. In retrospect I would have been straight forward and omitted the false bravado at home and in the office which I think exhausted me  

I also had a much larger Stage 3 grade 3 tumor, but believe his advise on finding an oncologist is critical. As I have mentioned before I had a great deal of confidence in my urologist as a surgeon but less so as a Doctor.  My oncologist specializes in kidney cancer and his active survaiellance with CT scans and blood tests makes alot of sense to me.

The surgery is not that bad.  A few days in the hosipital and a few weeks ar home and you will be fine.  You have to make sure you have a TV with cable and netflix and not to try to do too much too soon.  It is great news that they caught it is so early and it can be cured by surgery.  I never had any symtoms at all even though my tumor was 11 CM which I still find hard to be believe.  You are really lucky and will be fine

Don 

ajens2528 said:

Definitely scary Pauley! I am

Definitely scary Pauley! I am 24 and had a 3.2 cm tumor removed from my kidney on April 18th. It was in the cortex which is up and away from all the renal veins and other things that affect your kidney function. That sounds like where yours is, so thats great news right there! It was stage 1 and grade 2 which was excellent. They got it all and the chances of it coming back are slim! You will likely share the same story

My advice to you is let your family help you out with some of your stress. (Maybe not the kiddos, but other close friends and family) I did not so much, and I had a short episode of some PTSD for a day. Not fun. Also, learn as much as you can and write up a list of questions at every appointment. I went in with 2 pages of hand written questions and my doctor took the time to answer every one. You want to know as much as you can! Keep asking questions- even the hard ones!

But otherwise it was just like everyone said! 2 days in the hospital, 3 weeks off from work. My recovery went fantastically, I felt completely  normal by 5-6 weeks post op! Good luck!

Just tell them there is something inside you that makes you sick, the Drs. are going to take it out and that you'll be sore and not be able to bounce them on you lap or tummy.  Kids are very perceptive and will pick up on your cues. They'll be able to visit and will be curious about bandages. tubes, IV's.  When you're able, let them push the IV pole while you take a walk with them.  My grandson's about wore me out walking around the unit.  Time in the hospital can vary depending on what the docs find, how long the surgery lasts, how invasive they must explore, how soon you recover from anesthesia, can do all the required's (eat, pee and poop and walk).  2-3 days up to 4-5 days in hospital.  Rest, fluids, and help with housework and kids at home.  As you begin to sleep comfortably, walk without tiiring, etc. you'll know when to add a little more activity.  Don't overdo it, even when you think you are flying on top of the world at about 4-5 weeks.

I've Been There, Done That, and here to talk about it 7 years ago this month.

Good Luck, Safe Travels, and have a happy LaLa land.

Donna

donna_lee said:

All sorts of "Advice'

Just tell them there is something inside you that makes you sick, the Drs. are going to take it out and that you'll be sore and not be able to bounce them on you lap or tummy.  Kids are very perceptive and will pick up on your cues. They'll be able to visit and will be curious about bandages. tubes, IV's.  When you're able, let them push the IV pole while you take a walk with them.  My grandson's about wore me out walking around the unit.  Time in the hospital can vary depending on what the docs find, how long the surgery lasts, how invasive they must explore, how soon you recover from anesthesia, can do all the required's (eat, pee and poop and walk).  2-3 days up to 4-5 days in hospital.  Rest, fluids, and help with housework and kids at home.  As you begin to sleep comfortably, walk without tiiring, etc. you'll know when to add a little more activity.  Don't overdo it, even when you think you are flying on top of the world at about 4-5 weeks.

I've Been There, Done That, and here to talk about it 7 years ago this month.

Good Luck, Safe Travels, and have a happy LaLa land.

Donna

Our grandson who is very close to us..is 4 he has been apart of this process from the beginning.  Our oldest his Mom is a nurse...and wanted him to understand why Papaw could not do certain things for awhile..Chuck was inthe hospital for almost 3 weeks after he was diagnosed Kaleb visited often and got to know Chucks Drs...he is very comfortable with them and at visits..he says they are going to fix Papaw he's 4 he gets limited info but enough that he's comfortable...our children are older than yours but our youngest left for college after his nephrectomy.. that was tough on her..we promised not to hide anything and she comes for appointments when she can...if kids think parents have  a big scarey secret (because they pick up more than we think) it makes them uncertain and insecure...all the best huggggs

P.S. congrats on hitting the cancer lottery early detection is an awesome thing!!