Update: Hospice

daisy366
daisy366 Member Posts: 1,458 Member

Well ladies the decision is made. Doc admitted they "beat me up real bad" over last 8 months. I told him I felt 80% dead already. Blesses with little pain, my body can barely walk. I use a cane and essentially rest with eyes closed most of day. Appetite poor. Doc prescribed Magace to stimulate appetite, give energy, and hormone treatment that might slow things down, he then made referral to hospice. I will be admitted today. But will stay home.

ths bloating in abdomen is really tumor growth. They don't appear to be attached to organs.

it's been emotional. Planning funeral. Rudy visited a couple funeral homes. Saying goodbye to friends& family. friends helping to clean out garage! Now that's good kind soul! I struggle with paperwork that must get done. I am writing some family history down & making book to help Rudy with home maintenance which always fell on me. He's been apologizing for that. Guilt is haunting him. He's so good to me.

rudy's mother is dying too in ElPaso Tx. So he has lots going on. 

That's the latest. No high tea for me- God bless Linda! I'm tring to put closup up pix of me. But I' need to crop pix. 

I'll keepmyounposted. Love, Mary Ann

«1

Comments

  • Kathy G.
    Kathy G. Member Posts: 244 Member
    May Ann,
    My thoughts and

    May Ann,

    My thoughts and prayers are with you and your dear husband. I am so sorry you are going through all this...saying final good-byes to loved ones has to be gut-wrenching!

    May you continue through without pain.

    Please keep us informed if and when you feel up to it.

    You are on my mind.

    (((Hugs & tears)))

    Kathy

  • ConnieSW
    ConnieSW Member Posts: 1,677 Member
    Kathy G. said:

    May Ann,
    My thoughts and

    May Ann,

    My thoughts and prayers are with you and your dear husband. I am so sorry you are going through all this...saying final good-byes to loved ones has to be gut-wrenching!

    May you continue through without pain.

    Please keep us informed if and when you feel up to it.

    You are on my mind.

    (((Hugs & tears)))

    Kathy

    Dear Mary Ann

    It is said we live on as long as we are remembered.  Please know I will keep you with me.  You have had such a tremendous impact on those who use this board, and, like Linda, will continue to do so as future members seek help in the archives.  I don't know what to expect for myself but hope I will be able to deal with whatever comes with the courage and dignity you have modeled for us.  I thank you.

     

    My heart goes out to Rudy too.  

     

    Wouldlove to see your picture and put a face with your words.

     

    Love, Connie, who lives in the most northeast corner of NYS, bounded by Lake Champlain, the Canadian border, and the Adirondack   Park.

  • jazzy1
    jazzy1 Member Posts: 1,379
    Kathy G. said:

    May Ann,
    My thoughts and

    May Ann,

    My thoughts and prayers are with you and your dear husband. I am so sorry you are going through all this...saying final good-byes to loved ones has to be gut-wrenching!

    May you continue through without pain.

    Please keep us informed if and when you feel up to it.

    You are on my mind.

    (((Hugs & tears)))

    Kathy

    Mary Ann

    You've always been "the force", never wandering off the battle field and keeping the vision to endure.  This news truly breaks my heart as I've always looked up to you for guidance and support.  God does work is mysterious ways and know he has a plan for you.  

    Happy you have time to plan for good-byes and spend time with Rudy.  Wish I could be there as I'd give you a big hug and never let you go

    You'll continue in my daily prayers for continued strength......plse keep us posted~~

    Love always

    Jan

     

  • Cindy Bear
    Cindy Bear Member Posts: 569
    Dear Mary Ann

    You're post brings me to tears. Not because of cancer, or hospice, but because you're such a wonderfully strong, dignified, classy, articulate lady. I don' t know if you realize what a legacy you've left here on these pages. Always full of support, kind advice, and lots of great info. based on experience and research.  Though we never met, you're one of my personal heroes. Keeping you close in my thoughts and prayers.

     

    Love,

    CB

     

     

  • paris11
    paris11 Member Posts: 159
    Dear Mary Ann

    You are Magnificence personified.

    All blessings and all love to you and your wonderful Rudy.

    Connie

  • txtrisha55
    txtrisha55 Member Posts: 693 Member
    You are such a strong lady

    You are such a strong lady and full of courage.  It is always hard to say those good byes but so necessary to do so, especially family and friends.  I pray you and Rudy find some peaceful moments together.  I am so sorry to hear this news but know that you leave behind a wonderful, caring legacy of support and encouraging words for all the ladies on this site. Giving you lots of cyber hugs to get through this.  Trish

  • Stabler
    Stabler Member Posts: 51
    Mary Ann,
    I haven't been on

    Mary Ann,

    I haven't been on this sight long but I've read your posts and I'm in awe because you are such a strong woman and a great insperation to us all.   I am so sorry that you and your husband have to go thru this.  You and your husband are in my thoughts and prayers daily.  Please keep us posted.  And I would love to see a pic of you.  God bless you.

     

    Hugs and Tears

    Debbie

  • NoTimeForCancer
    NoTimeForCancer Member Posts: 3,352 Member
    Thank you

    Mary Ann,

    I was one of the newbies to this board but I have read many of your posts.  You have helped me so much with the things I read and I must say THANK YOU.  I pray for you and that God holds your family in His hands.  Not many people get to know what kind of impact they have made on this world but as you can see from this internet discussion board, you have touched many. 

    E

  • Sisters three
    Sisters three Member Posts: 165 Member

    Thank you

    Mary Ann,

    I was one of the newbies to this board but I have read many of your posts.  You have helped me so much with the things I read and I must say THANK YOU.  I pray for you and that God holds your family in His hands.  Not many people get to know what kind of impact they have made on this world but as you can see from this internet discussion board, you have touched many. 

    E

    God Bless.....

    Hard times for you, loving actions by you. I can only pray that your time will be eased with the greatness of Gods love and knowing that another adventure is just through the next door. I am praying for you and yours! thank you for all your continued shared wisdom.

    Write to us again soon!

    Lisa

  • Fayard
    Fayard Member Posts: 438 Member
     
    Mary Ann,
     
    I am going to

     

    Mary Ann,

     

    I am going to miss you, even though we do not know each other in person. I cannot help it, but I am deeply sad.
    You will always be in my prayers, as well as you family members who now need all the strength to live without you. It has been a real pleasure to meet you!

    (((((HUGS)))))

     

  • Ro10
    Ro10 Member Posts: 1,561 Member
    Mary Ann

    My heart breaks for you and Rudy.  This is such a difficult time for both of you.  I am so saddened by your report.  We started our journey about the same time.  I have long admired you and been inspired by your courage and determination.  I am so sorry you have had such a rough time these last eight months.  I am so blessed to have met you and have called you my friend.  I am glad you will find comfort with hospice.  You have been a true warrior.

    i can't imagine how difficult it is for you to say your good byes and planning a funeral.  It has to be very emotional.  Even though Rudy worked in hospice, this has too be more difficult for him now.  I am so sorry to hear Rudy's Mom is dying,too.

    thank you for sharing your difficulties with us.  You and Rudy remain in my daily prayers.  I pray for peace and comfort for you and your family.  You will  long be remembered by many.  In peace and caring.

  • kansasgal
    kansasgal Member Posts: 122 Member
    Dear Mary Ann,

    Ever since my journey with this select group began in 2009, I have always watched for your posts. Linda, Deanna, Marge, Mary Ann, Ro, Diane, Jill, Annie, California Artist, our sister with the yen for a little gambling, and it goes on - all of you are so very special to me. I hold you all in my heart and think of you every day. I still have not developed a true appreciation for green tea or for a mixture of turmeric, black pepper and a little olive oil, but these, too have become a part of my daily life.

    I send you and Rudy some gentle and loving hugs.

    Sally

  • nempark
    nempark Member Posts: 681
    Daisy

    Dearest Daisy:  I have not been posting, but I have been reading on a regular basis.  There are times since I have lost my daughter that I cannot bring myself to write, but I find it extremely necessary to write to you at this time.  Daisy I remember when my daughter told me she was dying, I told her that "God gives us relief, even if it means death".  Devastated as I was I learned to lean on the Scriptures which I will share with you, and which has brought me great comfort.

    Jesus compared death to a sleep. Speaking of the death of his dear friend he said: “Lazarus our friend has gone to rest, but I am traveling there to awaken him from sleep.” Then in explanation he said outspokenly to his disciples: “Lazarus has died.” (John 11:11-14, NW) Our new version shows where the verb “sleep” means death. When the martyr Stephen was being stoned and had said his last word, we read: “And after saying this he fell asleep in death.” Also, David “fell asleep in death and was laid with his forefathers”. 

    Death as Jesus was explaining is just like sleeping, when we go to sleep, we do not even know when we fall asleep, the same is death... it is like a deep sleep awaiting a ressurection.  Revelation 21:4 "And he will wipe out every tear from their eyes, and death will be no more neither will mourning nor outcry nor pain be anymore.  the former things have passed away." 

    For the living are conscious that they will die; but as for the dead, they are conscious of nothing at all. Ephesians 9:5.

    Daisy, you have been through a lot and have faced it with great strength and dignity.  Death is not a bad thing, it is the ultimate peace.  You will see your loved ones again in the resurrection, when God will make all things new.

    I wish you peace, comfort and most of all, I am happy that God has given you the opportunity to spend precious moments with the ones you love and can still take the time to write to us.  You are SPECIAL!!!! 

     

  • Alexandra
    Alexandra Member Posts: 1,308
    Dear Mary Ann

    I wanted to let you know how much your strength, courage and wisdom helped me and others.

    I am so sorry that your journey has been so difficult, especially lately.

    Love and blessings,

    Alexandra

  • sunflash
    sunflash Member Posts: 197 Member
    Alexandra said:

    Dear Mary Ann

    I wanted to let you know how much your strength, courage and wisdom helped me and others.

    I am so sorry that your journey has been so difficult, especially lately.

    Love and blessings,

    Alexandra

    Dear Mary Ann,
    I'm so sorry

    Dear Mary Ann,

    I'm so sorry to read about the struggles you're having. You are one special lady, and will always hold a very special place in my heart. 

    Please give Rudy our love...........I can only imagine how he feels dealing with everything he's faced with. He's as special as you are.

    Hold on to God's hand and draw strength from Him....He is there for you.  I'm glad you've made the decision to remain at home...may you be comforted in your own familiar surroundings.

    We love you, Mary Ann. Thank you for opening your heart to us.

    May you feel  all the love we're sending to you..........

  • NorahS
    NorahS Member Posts: 92
    sunflash said:

    Dear Mary Ann,
    I'm so sorry

    Dear Mary Ann,

    I'm so sorry to read about the struggles you're having. You are one special lady, and will always hold a very special place in my heart. 

    Please give Rudy our love...........I can only imagine how he feels dealing with everything he's faced with. He's as special as you are.

    Hold on to God's hand and draw strength from Him....He is there for you.  I'm glad you've made the decision to remain at home...may you be comforted in your own familiar surroundings.

    We love you, Mary Ann. Thank you for opening your heart to us.

    May you feel  all the love we're sending to you..........

    Mary Ann...

    I'm so very sad that the last road on your journey is not going to be as long as we thought it would be. You and Rudy should have had many more years together...

    much love,

     

     

     

     

  • laura25
    laura25 Member Posts: 180 Member
    Mary Ann

    People come into our lives for a reason.   They come to us in happy times; they assist us through difficulties, hold our hand and wipe away the tears.   These people leave footprints in our hearts and we are never the same.  We are better people for having known them.

    This is how I feel about you Mary Ann, thank you for being there for me. xoxo   

  • ConnieSW
    ConnieSW Member Posts: 1,677 Member
    laura25 said:

    Mary Ann

    People come into our lives for a reason.   They come to us in happy times; they assist us through difficulties, hold our hand and wipe away the tears.   These people leave footprints in our hearts and we are never the same.  We are better people for having known them.

    This is how I feel about you Mary Ann, thank you for being there for me. xoxo   

    One good thing

    No matter how hard the days are, I hope you find one good thing on each one.    Was there something today?

  • janh_in_ontario
    janh_in_ontario Member Posts: 151 Member
    blessing

    Someone said people come in your life as either a blessing or a lesson. I believe you have been both to me. I have learned from you, been supported by you and encouragdd so many times. I hope to meet you in the afterlife to give you a big hug!

    love to you, Rudy and your families.

    thank you so much for all that you do for us!

     

    janh

     

     

     

  • HellieC
    HellieC Member Posts: 524 Member
    So sad and difficult to read

    Oh Mary Ann.  I read your latest post with such sadness.  I hoped you would have much longer, but it seems from your words that you feel the time is coming nearer.

    You have been such a great support to me and to other ladies on these boards and that is a legacy that will continue for a long, long time.  Please hold that thought - everything you have said and done to comfort others and to offer hope will never dim.

    My heartfelt good wishes to you, Rudy and your family as you face such difficult times.  Saying goodbyes and making plans for your funeral must be so hard, but you are strong and brave and are tackling what must be done.  You have always been an inspiration to me and continue to be so.

    May God bless you and keep you comfortable.

    Helen