Feel like crying

lucy07
lucy07 Member Posts: 51
edited April 2013 in Breast Cancer #1

Hi everybody,

Three years ago I was told I had uterine cancer. I never told my hasband since he was dying from CLL and lymphoma. He died in February 2010 and I had my sergery in April 2010. I did radiation and kept up all my appointments. Returned to work and thought I was home free........Went to the doctor in March this year, he sent me for mammogram. Few days later he called and said he needs additional film on my left breast and sonogram. I went on the 24 th. Been scare since than every one at work said or it ok don't worry yo do not have any thing... but I am scared really really scared. The doctor called today but I missed his call... was in the meeting at work... will not be able to talk to him until Monday....so worried... He never calls with the good news ...something is wrong..Can I face another "you have cancer". Will I be able to handle it by myself... 

Comments

  • Lynn Smith
    Lynn Smith Member Posts: 1,264 Member
    #2
    I don't think he will tell you

    I don't think your doctor will tell you over the phone you have cancer.I had a needle biopsy(after my mammo found something). The  day after the needle biopsy the doctor's office called for me to come in. Cancer.My doctor told me in person and also another doctor was in the room.I didn't have my husband go with me. Probably why the second doctor was there.

    Very Very sorry about the loss of your husband.I know you didn't  have time for tests or wanted him to know.It had to be very hard.You were put in a bad spot. I'm so very sorry you are going through this now. Let us know the outcome.Hopefully the doctor has GOOD NEWS!!!!!!

    Thoughts and Prayers to You

    Lynn Smith 

  • RozHopkins
    RozHopkins Member Posts: 578 Member
    #3
    Gosh

    You have been through it.  So sorry.  Fingers crossed but if something is going on PLEASE keep it touch and we will help you through what comes next.  Good luck.

  • muffingranma
    muffingranma Member Posts: 107
    #4
    Sorry

    I had the four surgery's from August 2012 till February 2013. I never thought I could go through each one but I     have made it. Do you have any other family for support. So sorry for your loss of your husband. There is places on the Internet that will help you find people in your area going through the same thing. Hugs and prayers for you

  • smilingdeb
    smilingdeb Member Posts: 50
    #5
    It is okay to cry

    Hi lucy07,

    First, I am so sorry for the loss of your husband. It is not easy losing a love one. Second, it is okay to cry. When I was diagnose with my rare and aggressive IBC, stage 3b, I cried for about a week. More so out of fear cause my mom died of breast cancer. I did not have health insurance at the time and it was the doctor, I think that is was he was, at the Radiology Associates who called and told me I had cancer and that it was bad. I was crying so hard and could stay focus that I ask him to call my stepmom in Denver. And bless his heart he did. You had ask if you would be able to handle this by yourself and from what you have been through you sound like a strong warrior to me. Do you have family or friends that can help you? My sister and niece was with me on a few of my appts. but I did not want them having to sit around while I was having my chemo (about 4 hrs) so when I saw that I was handling the chemo okay I went by myself. I felt like it made me a stronger person and I knew it was my battle that I had to fight. So I put on my pink boxing glove and went in for the biggest fight of my life and very determine to win. I have now been in remission for 2 years and still have fear of "what ifs". Please feel free to conctact me if you want. I would love to hear from you.

    Lots of ciberhugs,

    Deb

  • jennifer101
    jennifer101 Member Posts: 26
    #6
    Lynn Smith said:

    I don't think he will tell you

    I don't think your doctor will tell you over the phone you have cancer.I had a needle biopsy(after my mammo found something). The  day after the needle biopsy the doctor's office called for me to come in. Cancer.My doctor told me in person and also another doctor was in the room.I didn't have my husband go with me. Probably why the second doctor was there.

    Very Very sorry about the loss of your husband.I know you didn't  have time for tests or wanted him to know.It had to be very hard.You were put in a bad spot. I'm so very sorry you are going through this now. Let us know the outcome.Hopefully the doctor has GOOD NEWS!!!!!!

    Thoughts and Prayers to You

    Lynn Smith 

    My doctor called meon the

    My doctor called meon the phone. I had biopsy on two sites on a Thursday and was told results due on Monday.  I had alreday done a lot of rresearch on door foams the radiologist had shown me my second mammograms and I coulease the pattern of calcifications band was able to find similar describes online. I figured it was most likely DCIS.

    well my gynecologismc called me around 6 pm.. I was alone (no husband or boyfriend) when he told me matter of faulty that one of the sites was atypichey hyperplasia. The second eras DCIS anyours "it is cancer"

     I was numb but as I had already seemed to have figured it out, I had also been able to read that DCIS was very treatable.  What I was not prepared for was the info I got from the onco surgeon that I saw nine days later, that while not invasive, my DCIS was high nuclear grade and of the comedo type.  Very rapidly growing and very deformed cells.

    We opted for a double mastectomy. 

    So yes, the doctor did phone. In retrospect, I think it would have been harder if he had said that it was urgent to come in to see him ASAP as that would have caused a sleepless night.

     

  • kdawg
    kdawg Member Posts: 7
    #7
    Lucy,
    So sorry you are going

    Lucy,

    So sorry you are going through this again. Being scared and crying is OK. When you speak with the doctor on Monday you will feel better no matter what the news is.

    Please keep us posted and know you have many friends and support hetre.

    Hugs coming your way.

    Kathy

  • Double Whammy
    Double Whammy Member Posts: 2,832 Member
    #8
    kdawg said:

    Lucy,
    So sorry you are going

    Lucy,

    So sorry you are going through this again. Being scared and crying is OK. When you speak with the doctor on Monday you will feel better no matter what the news is.

    Please keep us posted and know you have many friends and support hetre.

    Hugs coming your way.

    Kathy

    Waiting for results

    is nerve wracking to say the least.  Especially, when you get a phone call after a mastectomy.  I received the news via phone calls and in hindsight, I think it's a good idea - because I would have gone to an appointment by myself because I didn't believe anything would be wrong.  Not with me!  Getting the call (at home for me) was good.  I could gulp and cry and not kill anyone with my car on the way home after hearing the news personally.

    Lucy, I too had uterine cancer.  I was diagnosed with both 4-5 days apart.  One phone call and then another 4 days later.  What the????  I was told it is not unusual for a woman to have both uterine and breast cancers over the course of her lifetime.  It was unusual to be diagnosed with both at the same time, but not unusual to have both.  The risk factors are pretty much the same.  My cancers were both estrogen receptor positive.   It's been 3 years since this happened and I'm still ok.  I finished treatments in December 2010.  Surgery alone and follow up is all I needed for my uterine cancer, as it was early stage, low grade, but I had both chemotherapy and radiation for my breast cancer.   

    I hope you get good news on Monday and learn that you do not have breast cancer.  If you do, we're here for you.    So sorry to hear about your husband's death and hope you do have some support this weekend.  It's the pits to hear those words once and once we've heard them, I think we're always more worried we'll hear them again.  Please let us know.   I'll send some good mojo through cyberspace for you.

    Suzanne

  • Alexis F
    Alexis F Member Posts: 3,598
    #9
    kdawg said:

    Lucy,
    So sorry you are going

    Lucy,

    So sorry you are going through this again. Being scared and crying is OK. When you speak with the doctor on Monday you will feel better no matter what the news is.

    Please keep us posted and know you have many friends and support hetre.

    Hugs coming your way.

    Kathy

    My doctor called me and gave

    My doctor called me and gave me the news, even though I already had the feeling that it was bc.  We are all praying for you and wishing you good luck Monday.

    Post when you can to let us know.  Many hugs and prayers to you!

    Lex

  • LoveBabyJesus
    LoveBabyJesus Member Posts: 1,679 Member
    #10
    We are here for you!

    Hi Lucy -- I am sorry you are experiencing "THE WAIT", which we are all very familiar with. I will pray for you tonight. But I can tell you this, you are already a strong woman! You have been through a lot from the little bit you wrote. I am so sorry for your loss too. I pray that you don't have to deal with another diagnosis. If you do, we will be here to support you in all we can. I have faith you will handle whatever comes, because you've already handled so much more! I know this may not be the words you are looking for, because hey, who needs more? I don't want you to face more bad news. I do believe you will see the light at the end of the tunnel, whatever the news may be. Remember you are not alone. We are here holding your hand. Hang in there, and be at peace knowing this. Sending you hugs and prayers.

     

    And PLEASE let us know what he says.

  • Josie21
    Josie21 Member Posts: 382 Member
    #11
    Hope

    I hope tomorrow brings good news for you.  I know it must have been a long, hard weekend, but tomorrow will soon be here.  I pray the news is good, but even if it is not you Will handle it because you are a strong woman.  Your past has proven that and if it is breast cancer you will have a team of pink sisters and brothers behind you all the way.

    Hugs and positive thoughts coming your way,

    Ginny

  • lucy07
    lucy07 Member Posts: 51
    #12
    Josie21 said:

    Hope

    I hope tomorrow brings good news for you.  I know it must have been a long, hard weekend, but tomorrow will soon be here.  I pray the news is good, but even if it is not you Will handle it because you are a strong woman.  Your past has proven that and if it is breast cancer you will have a team of pink sisters and brothers behind you all the way.

    Hugs and positive thoughts coming your way,

    Ginny

    not crying

    Thank you all for the wonderfull words and heart felt support... I am not crying any more but very upset and worried... I did not tell anything to my mom and dad. Did not want to worry them ....Did tell my mammo and sono results to my daughter, she went through so much with seeing her dad dying and me going through my bit in 2010. She is very active with RElay for Life and even was a guest speaker two weeks ago at Relay. Thanks again..

  • lucy07
    lucy07 Member Posts: 51
    #13
    lucy07 said:

    not crying

    Thank you all for the wonderfull words and heart felt support... I am not crying any more but very upset and worried... I did not tell anything to my mom and dad. Did not want to worry them ....Did tell my mammo and sono results to my daughter, she went through so much with seeing her dad dying and me going through my bit in 2010. She is very active with RElay for Life and even was a guest speaker two weeks ago at Relay. Thanks again..

    More waiting

    went to get my films and report on Monday. Must have a biopsy and surgical consult. Gave me run a round but finally I called MSKCC Breast Center and now I have an appointment next Tuesday the 7th. So must have to wait again, but I am a little more calmer thanks to all of you. I'll keep the posts

  • lolad40
    lolad40 Member Posts: 5
    #14
    lucy07 said:

    More waiting

    went to get my films and report on Monday. Must have a biopsy and surgical consult. Gave me run a round but finally I called MSKCC Breast Center and now I have an appointment next Tuesday the 7th. So must have to wait again, but I am a little more calmer thanks to all of you. I'll keep the posts

    Lucy07

    I am so sorry about all that you have gone through.  Know that you are in the right place with the board and these wonderful sisters.  My heart and prayers are with you and please continue to keep us posted.  You are not alone here.  Know that and believe that.

  • lolad40
    lolad40 Member Posts: 5
    #15
    lucy07 said:

    More waiting

    went to get my films and report on Monday. Must have a biopsy and surgical consult. Gave me run a round but finally I called MSKCC Breast Center and now I have an appointment next Tuesday the 7th. So must have to wait again, but I am a little more calmer thanks to all of you. I'll keep the posts

    Lucy07

    I am so sorry about all that you have gone through.  Know that you are in the right place with the board and these wonderful sisters.  My heart and prayers are with you and please continue to keep us posted.  You are not alone here.  Know that and believe that.

  • lucy07
    lucy07 Member Posts: 51
    #16
    lolad40 said:

    Lucy07

    I am so sorry about all that you have gone through.  Know that you are in the right place with the board and these wonderful sisters.  My heart and prayers are with you and please continue to keep us posted.  You are not alone here.  Know that and believe that.

    Thanks Lolad.....hugs....

    Thanks Lolad.....hugs....

  • Pink Rose
    Pink Rose Member Posts: 493
    #17
    lucy07 said:

    More waiting

    went to get my films and report on Monday. Must have a biopsy and surgical consult. Gave me run a round but finally I called MSKCC Breast Center and now I have an appointment next Tuesday the 7th. So must have to wait again, but I am a little more calmer thanks to all of you. I'll keep the posts

    Sending lots of hugs!

    Sending lots of hugs!

  • lucy07
    lucy07 Member Posts: 51
    #18
    Pink Rose said:

    Sending lots of hugs!

    Sending lots of hugs!

    Thank you Pink Rose
    I needed

    Thank you Pink RoseSmile

    I needed that.. too much on my mind...worry worry.. and what if.. what if it's cancer again

    what if I need chemo.. will I loose my hair.. what if I do...I probobly be the one with the wig all messed up and backwards...I think I might go crazy by Tuesday...So hugs a very much welcome right about now. Thanks again

  • Josie21
    Josie21 Member Posts: 382 Member
    #19
    lucy07 said:

    Thank you Pink Rose
    I needed

    Thank you Pink RoseSmile

    I needed that.. too much on my mind...worry worry.. and what if.. what if it's cancer again

    what if I need chemo.. will I loose my hair.. what if I do...I probobly be the one with the wig all messed up and backwards...I think I might go crazy by Tuesday...So hugs a very much welcome right about now. Thanks again

    Hi Lucy07

    Don't get ahead of yourself.  What if's will drive you nuts!! I see you are going to Sloan.  That's where I went and you are in great hands.  

    Sending you hugs, positive thoughts, prayers and anything else you need to get you through until next week!

    Hugs,

    Ginny

  • Noel
    Noel Member Posts: 3,095 Member
    #20
    RozHopkins said:

    Gosh

    You have been through it.  So sorry.  Fingers crossed but if something is going on PLEASE keep it touch and we will help you through what comes next.  Good luck.

    My deepest sympathy for the

    My deepest sympathy for the loss of your husband.  Wishing you good luck and praying for you.

    Hugs, Noel

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