Kinda Personal (as in sex)

robswife87
robswife87 Member Posts: 209
edited April 2013 in Head and Neck Cancer #1

We were told by the Medical Oncology dept, that from time chemo is given and for 48 hours after infusion, we should not be kissing, sharing drinks, etc. because of the possible chemo being expelled through saliva, urine, etc.

Now here is the question, should we use barrier type protection if we choose to get intimate?

I know a lot of people would ask "get intimate? He is sick". But the answer is he doesn't feel sick yet. 

On the good side, chemo #2 done feeling good, taste is just about gone, He can taste a little sweet, but meat he said is horrible. 29 more Rads to go.

It was nice to see all the NED's this week, Keep on keeping on.

Sandy

Comments

  • NJShore
    NJShore Member Posts: 429 Member
    #2
    We asked too

    Sandy,

    No need to be embarrassed.. normal question. Although our RO and ON were both surprised when we asked.. our RO actually said no one has ever asked her... I think she needs a memory check.. :)

    The answer is yes, barrier protection is a good idea during treatment. Not just for 48 hours. As you will see when the effects 'might' set in, if the other side effects last for days - why take a risk? You don't need to feel poorly either.

    As long as he's feeling up to it, there are no other rules we were told.

    Kari

     

  • Alexandra
    Alexandra Member Posts: 1,308
    #3
    Hi Sandi

    I am from a different board, but I thought I will drop my 2 cents.

    I was told by chemo nurse to use condom for intercourse and for giving oral and rubber dam (like dentists use) for receiving oral. All the time, not just for 48 hrs. And no one was surprised. They even run a workshop at my cancer center about sexual side effects of cancer and treatment.

    Never stopped "being intimate" before, during or after chemo. That's what kept me out of depression. And never actually used any of that rubber stuff.

    Best wishes in your husband's treatment

     

  • Tim6003
    Tim6003 Member Posts: 1,514 Member
    #4
    Alexandra said:

    Hi Sandi

    I am from a different board, but I thought I will drop my 2 cents.

    I was told by chemo nurse to use condom for intercourse and for giving oral and rubber dam (like dentists use) for receiving oral. All the time, not just for 48 hrs. And no one was surprised. They even run a workshop at my cancer center about sexual side effects of cancer and treatment.

    Never stopped "being intimate" before, during or after chemo. That's what kept me out of depression. And never actually used any of that rubber stuff.

    Best wishes in your husband's treatment

     

    I have five kids (all natural) ...so......

    ...so nothing is too embarrasing to me...lol....

    I knew I was in trouble when at my cancer treatmet center I went to the restroom my first day and it said "chemo paitients please flush twice" ....so yes, I would  imagine some type of barrier would be good ......

  • fisrpotpe
    fisrpotpe Member Posts: 1,349 Member
    #5
    sorry

    sorry but i must ask? 

    Why take the risk?  when i did mine we did nothing for months. in the beginning it was a challenge no doubt but two weeks into treatment it was easy to not have any. 

    for me the few times even daily is not worth the short reward over the large risk

    john 

  • robswife87
    robswife87 Member Posts: 209
    #6
    fisrpotpe said:

    sorry

    sorry but i must ask? 

    Why take the risk?  when i did mine we did nothing for months. in the beginning it was a challenge no doubt but two weeks into treatment it was easy to not have any. 

    for me the few times even daily is not worth the short reward over the large risk

    john 

    Easy, No risk taking here then

    We know that this is an unimportant issue yet important. It will be completely up to him when and if he wants to get intimate. Chemo day he is like the energizer bunny because of the steroids, but he is afraid to hold hands because he does not want to poisin me.

    We will definitely use protection if we choose to have relations. He would never risk getting me ill with the chemo. 

    In my thinking, I will do whatever he does or does not want to do. I just want to keep his spirits and energy up during this time. 

    Sandy

  • amy_h414
    amy_h414 Member Posts: 98
    #7
    condoms

    We used condoms while hubby was receiving chemo.

  • Skiffin16
    Skiffin16 Member Posts: 8,305 Member
    #8

    Well..., as I am totally Abi-Normal.... I see way too much material for me to use in cracking stupid human jokes...and I must ReFrain..though it's really .... ummm tough.

    But a lot of good advice here...

    I can't really tell you the longevity of chemo retention in the body. I believe most is flushed out fairly quickly. Not sure on the heavy metal based platinum derivitives... But I'm sure you can find some work arounds if absolutely necessary.

    After all this is a fight for life, and that is what's the main thing...

    But also, no questions that have come up before are off-limits....

    And please excuse my tendancy toward attempted humor and mis-direction at times... I'm abi-normal, and always have been..., not chemo induced, LOL.

    JG

  • CivilMatt
    CivilMatt Member Posts: 4,724 Member
    #9
    Skiffin16 said:

    Well..., as I am totally Abi-Normal.... I see way too much material for me to use in cracking stupid human jokes...and I must ReFrain..though it's really .... ummm tough.

    But a lot of good advice here...

    I can't really tell you the longevity of chemo retention in the body. I believe most is flushed out fairly quickly. Not sure on the heavy metal based platinum derivitives... But I'm sure you can find some work arounds if absolutely necessary.

    After all this is a fight for life, and that is what's the main thing...

    But also, no questions that have come up before are off-limits....

    And please excuse my tendancy toward attempted humor and mis-direction at times... I'm abi-normal, and always have been..., not chemo induced, LOL.

    JG

    protect and serve

    Skiffin,

    Kind of puts a different spin on our big get together, but that’s okay there is a 24-hour Walgreens everywhere.

    Testing the waters,

    Matt

  • hwt
    hwt Member Posts: 2,328 Member
    #10
    CivilMatt said:

    protect and serve

    Skiffin,

    Kind of puts a different spin on our big get together, but that’s okay there is a 24-hour Walgreens everywhere.

    Testing the waters,

    Matt

    What the heck....

    I finished tx last May and this is the first I ever heard about not kissing, sharing drinks, sex, etc. while I was getting Cisplatin.  Since my first tx hit me pretty hard, it probably wasn't an issue but one would have thought my ONC would have said something upfront.  Apparently, some doctors feel it is more of an issue than others.

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