Question for you Ladies

Not sure how to advise you, exactly -- an alternate idea might be to email her

I was fortunate in that at work I have two colleagues who have dealt with what I have had to deal with the past year plus.  I also have a few others there, as well as at church, who had less drastic problems than I but still offered support.

One of my best friends lost her battle with bc -- her husband thinks that part of that was because her DR did not take her a more aggressive route.  She had a recurrence of cancer which ended up in her bones and elsewhere.  Her husband and mine have been friends for years.  Actually, my husband has another friend whose wife, someone I work with, who has battled bc.  So, over the years, the three of them have talked, although this time my husband had a different perspective.

Our friend Brian has been good for both of us, as he has shared things with us.  I also think that in ways, we have been good for Brian.  Even though it has been almost 2.5 years since Val died, it seems that he feels he can talk with us about things that went on, as he knows we understand and understand it all better than anyone else he knows.  It was a relief to me to know that if he wanted to, my husband had someone he could talk to -- and he did, sometimes. 

So, it may be that both you and your wife can be a source of encoruagement to this couple.

When I was going through treatment I had a lot of people that I did not really know come up to me and ask me guestions about the beast, my treatments and how I was doing. One of them was the Social Worker for our unit. She wanted to know my experiences so that if there was someone else on base fighting the beast she would be better prepared to help them. She used to visit me atleast once a week. I finished chemo in Feb of 2010 and Rads in July of 2010. I retired from Civil Service in Sep 2010 after 37 years. I have been crocheting hats since May of 2010. I donate most of them to local chemo clinics but some I donate to individuals. I used to just keep to myself and would never approach someone that I did not know. Now I just walk up to people, that I can tell are going through treatment, and ask them if they would like a hat and give them my phone number. I never, in my life thought that I would be able to do something like that but I do it all the time now. Cancer changes us all. I was lucky my supervisor also had BC. She had finished her treatments but was still taking Herceptin. So she knew exactly what I was going through. She and I used to have dscussions and compare notes. I was glad that I had enough leave that I never had to ask for it while I was in treatment. The Social Worker for your unit may have already talked to your co-worker but it never hurts to have a friend especially one who has been there.

Hugs

Donna

Double Whammy said:

I think it would be perfectly appropriate

to introduce yourself to her and make that offer.  If the unit was asking for leave donations and included her name in the email, she is obviously not opposed to people (i.e., strangers) knowing.  She is in fact reaching out for help by requesting leave donations.  So, I see nothing wrong and think it is perfectly appropriate for you to approach her.  The worst thing that can happen is she'll say "no thank you" and if she does, you can leave the door open if she changes her mind. 

Suzanne

I would like to agree 100% with what Suzanne/Double Whammy said. Go ahead and make that introduction and your offer of help. I think you would be a great resource. You will have lost nothing by making the offer and she could have something to gain.

IRENE