Ready To SCREAM

You really do deserve to scream, to be frightened, to want to vent. And yes, sometimes when people say 'its going to be OK', I'm like, 'How on earth do you know its going to be OK?' But you know deep inside that they only mean the best for you. 

Like you said, its real, it hurts, its scary, I might die, I don't want to die, I'm scared. I'm beyond scared. 

You are young, you are facing your mortalily and it hurts to think about it. I am so sorry about your son's paternal grandparents. Talk about kick you when you're down. I hope that works out for you, and your mother continues as his caregiver. 

I wish I could impart just how much I feel your pain, your fears. They are so much more different than mine right now, but I feel your pain, your fear and my heart just goes out to you in every way. 

You are a good woman. Inspite of what you are going through, you posted a message to me that was so beautiful, special to me. That, my friend, shows me that you are a very special woman, who can leave her pain for a short while to make others feel good. 

I hope your recovery moves along, and that this stage can be left behind, never to be revisited. 

May you be comforted and blessed. 

SUE

KayeKay said:

BTW

by the way, does anyone know what i should do. My kids father and his parents (who are the biggest scum walking the earth) are trying to use my sickness to their advantage and gain custody of my son. this all happened the first time i got sick so i signed guardianship to my mother so they couldnt do anything. now that im sick again their trying again. to do this to anyone is sickening. they disgust me and i do not want him growing up with them. u just dont even know. i wanna do everything i can to keep them away and especially if something happens to me. what should i do? can a judge actually use cancer as a justified cause? 

Re:

“…..by the way, does anyone know what i should do. My kids father and his parents (who are the biggest scum walking the earth) are trying to use my sickness to their advantage and gain custody of my son…..”

The courts will usually allow custody to be granted to the surviving parent upon the death of the parent having sole custody. If there is a legally compelling reason that the surviving parent is not legally suitable to have custody, the child will be a ward of the court until the matter can be resolved. That’s not “the rule”, but of the most common procedure.

The child’s interests should take precedence. Especially so under the circumstances, since the death of a parent does not come lightly. Watching a parent suffer is as much of a traumatic event as death, so the child’s feelings and welfare should come first.

It’s a painful choice, and not always ours to make, but it ours to resolve in our own minds and soul.

If it were me, I would attempt to make the conditions the best for my child. If temporary custody, or shared custody can be accomplished, perhaps that’s the better choice under the present circumstances.

The child’s welfare should come first; we owe that to those we bring into this world.

Sometimes, a child can tell you more than you wish to know….. Ask the child…

I’m not a religious guy (the last time I prayed the Pope quit), but I want you to know that you have all my best wishes for better days.

John

devotion10 said:

You can get through this.

Have you heard the saying ... whatever you are given to bear, you will be given the strength to bear?  I can tell you've got courage. Best -- Cynthia

It's okay to scream, or cry, or be angry. Right now though, don't let this anger at these people consume you. It will do nothing for your healing process. This is the important thing to concentrate on.  Also when you're stronger, I'll bet your head will be clearer in order to think it all through and make a plan.

Wishing the best for you and your son.

Luv,

Wolfen

wolfen said:

Kayekay

It's okay to scream, or cry, or be angry. Right now though, don't let this anger at these people consume you. It will do nothing for your healing process. This is the important thing to concentrate on.  Also when you're stronger, I'll bet your head will be clearer in order to think it all through and make a plan.

Wishing the best for you and your son.

Luv,

Wolfen

You have every right to express the way you feel. We have all been there. "You can pick your friends but not your family" Try to leave even a small light on if you fear or ssn electric andle bedside. This helped after a recent surgery. Probably sounds crazy....it was my hourly symbol of hope and strength. You have good advice here. Try to focus on your wellness. All will fall in place for your son. You are strong and intentional. I have an ex -husband whose girlfriend has a van lined up.(guess he is spotting what to take) :-( and my mother's youngest sister who is random in involvement with my diagnosis. One minute she says she's available in June to help and then texts its spring break...can I help. Same person who failed to pick my mother up when released from second surgery due to car problems? My mom doesn't ask about chemo etc., and says cancer is too scary to ask about.> I do not understand my family. You are not alone - try to heal and focus on your son as you can. Use the cane if needed. I had to.....you can get thu this phase one day at a time. Its very difficult to accept how cancer changes us and many times the family around us. Barb

I feel your pain. I hate chemo more than surgery. It really hit me the day after they put my port back in and I cried. I felt like I was on parole and just sent back to jail.