Got to vent, can't tell anyone yet.

2ndtymeround said:

Got out of the house

I decided to go out buy some funny movies.  It helped.  Going to try and have a movie night with my son.

 

That was a very good idea!! Good for you!! Try not to worry too much...and don't forget...you can live without a colon.  It is not so bad. I lost all of mine at my initial surgery. The first thing I said when the surgeon told me was..."well I guess it won't come back there again!" Best of luck to you...sending positive energy and thoughts your way.

First, congratulations on 15-years!

Sometimes, Life can get in the way of even our best intentions...I had a trying time all of last year and still some residual left this year in a non-cancer arena and I know how hard it is to keep all the balls in the air when you're being torn in several directions at once.

It happens...

I'm concerned at the size of that mass...I found a chart and did a conversion...it told me that 40mm = 4cm. 

I remember the scope that revealed my cancer...I woke up from the sedation in the middle of the procedure...it was running longer than usual, because the gastro was also using a hot rod trying to burn that tumor out.  All he did was make a big ol' mess...it was so big that he couldn't really eliminate too much of it.

I woke up and said "What's happening?" and they hit me with the juice and back down I went....but before I left, I saw the screen...and it looked like this great big ol' bright red sun....he had poked around so much he could no longer see due to the blood flow.

Anyway, I'm sorry you have nobody to talk to.  Are you and your wife still friends at all?  Can you confide in her?  Do you want to?

I can understand protecting your son with his condition....it is hard to go through cancer alone...I've done much of that during my 9-years....I totally get it.  You have to be really strong upstairs in your head to weather the storm on your own.

But hey, you do have an outlet up here...guaranteed!  Plenty of folks to talk with up here...and that's a good thing for everyone involved. 

Talking about this will free up the emotional trauma and pop the cork on those feelings you've got bottled up inside you right now...

We'll wait with you as you await the path reports...we'll have lots to talk about.

Your story already points to the fact that we must never let our guard down - even when we think we've safely slipped out under the fence under the cover of the night.  I've never gotten that far out clear, so I can't say that I would have not begun to take things for granted.  I'm sure it is much easier to do the further you get removed from the disease. 

But today is today...and we'll worry about tomorrow....tomorrow. 

Best wishes as you move forward!

2ndtymeround said:

I just got the call

I am really emotional now.  The Doctor confirm that it was not cancerous. Even though it was quit large, I squeaked by.  I have to go back in 2 months for a follow up.  Thanks for all the support.

 

I want to add that I awoke during the procedure 15 years ago.  I watched as they took plugs from the tumor.  I said out loud " That doesn't look good", last thing I remember.

 

I now have Flex-Sigs and stay awake through the procedure.  This time I was joking around with the Doctor and asking questions regarding what he is seeing.  He was pulling the Flex-Sig out and viewing the colon and rectum.  Everything was looking good, I was getting relaxed.  We both noticed the Polyp at the same time, how could it be missed.  They put a pad on my hip that completed the circuit for the equipment.  I then watched as he used a snare to take chucks out of the polyp.  This took a long time and he had to clean up a lot of blood and burned flesh.  I got more worried as I began to realize the size of the polyp.  I guess everything festered from there.

 

Thanks again for all your support.  You are all truly a wonderful group of people. I've decided to stay on this board and put my two cents in when I can.  I will be changing my name (bad karma), maybe Scared Straight?

 

 

 

 

 

 

2ndtymeround said:

I just got the call

I am really emotional now.  The Doctor confirm that it was not cancerous. Even though it was quit large, I squeaked by.  I have to go back in 2 months for a follow up.  Thanks for all the support.

 

I want to add that I awoke during the procedure 15 years ago.  I watched as they took plugs from the tumor.  I said out loud " That doesn't look good", last thing I remember.

 

I now have Flex-Sigs and stay awake through the procedure.  This time I was joking around with the Doctor and asking questions regarding what he is seeing.  He was pulling the Flex-Sig out and viewing the colon and rectum.  Everything was looking good, I was getting relaxed.  We both noticed the Polyp at the same time, how could it be missed.  They put a pad on my hip that completed the circuit for the equipment.  I then watched as he used a snare to take chucks out of the polyp.  This took a long time and he had to clean up a lot of blood and burned flesh.  I got more worried as I began to realize the size of the polyp.  I guess everything festered from there.

 

Thanks again for all your support.  You are all truly a wonderful group of people. I've decided to stay on this board and put my two cents in when I can.  I will be changing my name (bad karma), maybe Scared Straight?

 

 

 

 

 

 

I'll tell you- you got my attention! It's 20 years since my visit with the beast, and I still wonder if I'll ever have to go through that again. I used to go every two years for a c'scopy, and the last time I went was 3 years ago. They also found a polyp, and I was a nutcase 'til the result finally came back negative. I really need to get back for another look in there, but lack of funds has been making me put it off. I have to bite the bullet and get it done. Thanks for the reality check!

Carl

OOPS Double post